Ever had a teenager around?

[An Officer]

I haven't had a teenager around ever, as far as I can remember... so when I recently had one over to stay a while, a lot of things came as a shock...

The amount of time they spend in the bathroom (2 hours at least)
The amount of mess they can leave behind every step they take
The absurd sleeping hours
The amount of nutrients they can pack away, and still remain hungry
The strong emotional outbursts, whether of happiness or annoyance
The shoes that have to be left outside

Was I ever like that? I find it difficult to imagine! I must have been, and worse too, I'm sure!

It was like having a little person from Mars come to stay... makes me wonder what it's like to raise a teenager full-time! Exciting and exasperating all at once, I imagine. I've never cleaned nor cooked so much in a long time!

Have you had experience with a teenager? What was it like? Would you trade them over for a different aged child? Or would you not have them any other way? Share your stories please...

 

[Kestra]

I was able to spend a decent amount of time with my 16 year old cousin in India earlier this year, and I was definitely struck with how much she had grown up. She totally reminded me of myself at that age.

Anytime I was talking about anything having to do with men with my older cousin, she wanted in on the convos. At my cousin's wedding, her earring kept coming off and to her it was such an important part of her outfit. Then another part of her outfit was getting messed up and she looked ready to cry. I know she had picked all of it out way in advance, and it was such a big deal to her. So I took her in the bathroom, helped her repin her outfit, and gave her the backings from my own earrings. Because I didn't care, but I remember being at that age where everything was a big deal.

I wish I could be around for her in a big sister sort of way. She's a good girl, and doesn't know a lot about guys, or sex. And there's no one around for her the way my sis was around for me, covering for each other's secrets, fixing each other's hair, gossiping late at night, etc.

I feel like the teenage years are so tumultuos and I wish I was around just to tell her that it's all normal.

 

[sidious618]

All of those things match my sister except for the shoes. She's 15 years old.

 

[RandyS]

The only experience I've ever had with a teenager (other than myself, and I was as perfect then as I am now) was my younger brother. And he had already started his alcoholism at age 11. He made both my, and my mom's life a living hell for those years. I'm not sure I even know what a "normal" teenager is like.

 

[Mr Awe]

The amount of time they spend in the bathroom (2 hours at least)
The amount of mess they can leave behind every step they take
The absurd sleeping hours
The amount of nutrients they can pack away, and still remain hungry
The strong emotional outbursts, whether of happiness or annoyance
The shoes that have to be left outside

Funny, other than the amount of time in the bathroom, this very same list can apply to toddlers as well!!

Mr Awe

 

[Brent]

My sister just turned 15 this past March, she needs a belting!

Seriously, teenagers make no sense. They need to insert their brain into their head and use it.

 

[An Officer]

I remember what it was like to have a toddler around as well, and it was certainly exhausting, but at least they weren't talking about peer pressure and the activities of their friends yet... sometimes quite shocking and heart-breaking to listen to from a teenager! It looks like most teenagers lead more stressful lives than those in their 30's!

You are echoing exactly how I felt with my dear little cousin, Kestra... She brought out all my maternal instincts, but she felt able to confide in me as a peer of sorts at the same time I think. She appears to be going through what I went through much later in my teens. It seems everything is much more accelerated for them now, sex, clubbing, drugs... and she's only 14! I think she enjoyed having an ear around that wasn't quite a mother, nor a peer, but someone old enough to confide in and listen to. It was a pleasure... but it really brought back what a strange time being a teenager was - complete with being taller than you feel, and bumping into things, and being all arms and legs! I don't think I would want to go through that phase again myself for all the tea in China. The experiences of her age-group now seem to be much more stressful and damaging than mine in the 90's. My little cousin seems to be remarkably insightful and handling it well for her age, I must say.

I believe you probably have to be a genius, have a sixth sense, and be clairvoyant to boot, to raise a teenager successfully. Not me mention being possessed of masses of empathy, patience, and limitless energy too.

 

[Michael Chris]

A few: my older brother and the siblings of friends.

 

[Mr Awe]

I remember what it was like to have a toddler around as well, and it was certainly exhausting, but at least they weren't talking about peer pressure and the activities of their friends yet... sometimes quite shocking and heart-breaking to listen to from a teenager! It looks like most teenagers lead more stressful lives than those in their 30's!

I have a 4 year old right now. Believe me, there is peer pressure and talk about what the friends are doing. Of course, its about totally different activities and subjects, but the behavior is remarkably similar. There even is heart break too, but usually it's over a lost or broken toy!

Mr Awe

 

[An Officer]

Yes, but it could be fixed with a bowl of sugar and lemon strawberries, or a swing in the park!

 

[Crash]

My eldest brother told me there's one universal truth to raising kids.

For the first two years you teach them to walk and talk, and for the next sixteen you tell them to sit down and shut up.

 

[Aurian]

I'm an aunt to 3 great teenagers.

Love them. Im very impressed by all of them. Great kids.
They are all taller than me.
I do all the serious talks that their parents cant have with them. And im on their side if they need a helping hand in discussions with unreasonable parents lol

 

[TheBrew]

Sounds like my brother. Who is 21.

 

[Kestra]

You are echoing exactly how I felt with my dear little cousin, Kestra... She brought out all my maternal instincts, but she felt able to confide in me as a peer of sorts at the same time I think. She appears to be going through what I went through much later in my teens. It seems everything is much more accelerated for them now, sex, clubbing, drugs... and she's only 14! I think she enjoyed having an ear around that wasn't quite a mother, nor a peer, but someone old enough to confide in and listen to. It was a pleasure... but it really brought back what a strange time being a teenager was - complete with being taller than you feel, and bumping into things, and being all arms and legs! I don't think I would want to go through that phase again myself for all the tea in China. The experiences of her age-group now seem to be much more stressful and damaging than mine in the 90's. My little cousin seems to be remarkably insightful and handling it well for her age, I must say.

My cousin's very mature in some ways too, but growing up in India, everything is different. I can't be around for her for all the little questions, and her parents refuse to acknowledge that India is changing and everyone doesn't get a medical degree and then an arranged marriage. I don't think she's into drinking, sex, or drugs, but I'm sure she's exposed to such things and it's only a matter of time otherwise. And if no one around her will talk to her about it and treat her maturely, she's going to have a more difficult time handling all the things that come with being a teenager.

Maybe I just worry too much. It's just that I used to have another female cousin only a few years younger than me, and she committed suicide when she was thirteen. I feel like an older sister that's never around ...

 

[SPOCKED]

I have a 15, 17, and 19 year old.


I try to reason with them. Help them see the better path. Help them understand that what they are doing is really, really unnecessary and most likely intensifies and compounds the problem.

But do they listen?

They got the brain damage

 

[Aurian]

^

*feels uneasy whenever people say things like that about their kids*

 

[RoJoHen]

I still eat like I'm a teenager, and I still remain hungry at all hours.

 

[K'Ehleyr]

Yes, 16yr old son has finished boarding school and returned home for good.
I totally agree with the mess, the sleeping and the eating. Currently son is surviving on sausage rolls and crisps despite the stash of ham, cream cheese, chicken, coleslaw, salad etc in fridge bagels are too complicated to make apparently

He has just finished exams and it is beautiful weather so I am relaxed with him at the moment. And he has done his cv and taken it around lots of places for summer work so he's doing ok.
He spends most of his time out with a seemingly endless variety of friends. He always tells me where he's going and calls if it gets to 9'ish to tell me what he's up to. He'll help with the table if he's home for dinner, clear up the sitting room if he has friends over to stay. He's happy, polite, will come and watch tele with us before retiring to his room with MSN (unfortunately meaning my evening time on here is gone), video games and a discreet ciggie. And we have a good laugh together too. (The pot fiasco seems to have passed.)

So all in all he's pretty fab! Thank you An Officer for making me realise this

 

[Chekov's Phaser]

I have about 100-150 every school year. Imagine spending hours and hours with them.

 

[Misfit Toy]

My son turns 13 at the end of this month. He's already got the "messy" part down. He's always been advanced.