DS9 Caption That # "The Empire Strikes Back"

[Judas Ascendant]

The pics for this round

Extra credit

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Jake: "You're a Cylon aren't you?"

Sisko: "What gave it away?"

 

[-Brett-]

I'll take some easy ones.

"Holy crap! It's huge!"

This year, for April Fools Day, O'Brien attached a cannister of nitrous oxide to the runabouts life support system.

 

[Navaros]

Odo: "It is true your clothing has gotten slightly-less obscene over the years. However, with what you are wearing now, it still remains my duty to arrest you again for committing indecent exposure upon the Promenade."

Jake: "I thought for sure we finally fixed the problem this time."

Sisko: "Chin up, Jake-O. We just have a bit more work to do!"

Garak: "This slash fiction is obscene. Clearly it is understating my endowment by at least four inches!"

Siddig reviews the old DS9 MU reels to determine if a possible civil lawsuit is in the cards for likeness violation regarding "Baltar".

 

[The Cutest of Borg]

Trisha Helfer: "I'm really sorry Sid. They were all set to give you the part of Baltar when someone saw your over-acting in The Passenger."

 

[CaptainJon]

"Constable, I swear! I thought she was 18!"

Sisko: "Good form."
Jake: "Good shape."
Sisko: "Nice grip."
Jake: "There's nothing gay about this at all."

"It's true what they say...Klingons never do anything small!"

Bashir: "You know, if you go blonde, we might be able to pass as Six and Baltar."

Jadzia: "Sure, but I still won't sleep with you."
Bashir: "Aw, shit."

 

[PKTrekGirl]

Pinning this now. Have fun, all!

And thanks again, JA!

 

[grabthars hammer]

Jake: Do you think this shirt is slimming?
Odo: Frankly, I try to avoid looking at your clothing as much as possible, it tends to make my eyes liquefy.

Ben: Sorry again, Jake-O. I promise we'll keep searching the sector for some decent-looking civilian clothes.

Garak: What are YOU doing with my garter belt on?

Dax: When we get back, I promise Garak will make you a sequined jumpsuit. Just stop singing 'Hound Dog' for five minutes.
Bashir: Thank you... thank you very mucccch.

Bashir: Alright, that's the LAST time we visit the same salon. Agreed?

 

[AdmiralGarak]

Odo: "I've come to investigate some highly audible apparel in violation of anti-noise regulation 16-G of the Uniform Promenade Security Charter."
Jake: "Wha...?"
Odo: "Your shirt's too loud."
Jake: "Ah."

Jake: "Dad... to tell you the truth, I'm really more of a cricket fan."
Sisko: "I have no son."

Garak: "Wow that thing is huge! That's incredible! I mean it's just so long and muscular and full of power! I'd love to take into my hands and..."
Regent Worf: "Enough about the blasted vole! Tell me what you think of my penis!"
Garak: "I've seen better."

If this were the bass-ackwards Mirror Universe, this caption would be funny.

Gunn: "What do you mean that The Sopranos ended without closure! Who ends a television series right in the middle of the sce..."
{Fade to black}
Gunn (voice): "Joss!"

 

[CorporalClegg]

AdmiralGarak said:

Gunn: "What do you mean that The Sopranos ended without closure! Who ends a television series right in the middle of the sce..."
{Fade to black}
Gunn (voice): "Joss!"

 

[Nebusj]

``You're right, Constable, wearing your girlfriend changeling as an outfit feels great!''
``Shut up.''

``Son, I'm proud that you want to wear that little Christmas light monitor from Spock's station, but I'm afraid that if you don't change Garak in his position as station tailor will have you summarily executed.''

Nobody was ready for Cousin It to be in the remake of Profit and Lace.

``Baltar? No, I get much more of an Outrageous Okana vibe out of you.''

``I know how to escape! I'll grab the sprocket holes from the edge of the film!''
``It won't work. They put us on tape for editing.''

Why is Smeagol sneaking into a Real World confessional session?

 

[DBR]

"We hear you're looking for Candyman, bitch. Well guess what, you found him!"

 

[Nerys Myk]

Garak wasn't ready for "The Crying Game."

Bashier: So in this other universe I'm a doctor and you are a scientist.

Dax (snicker)

Bashier: No really!!

 

[Elmo Dukat]

Odo contemplated pushing Jake over the edge so he wouldn't have to look at that horrible, horrible shirt again.

The Spirit of Space Invaders transferred its possession of Jake to Sisko. Finally, after centuries of planning, their scheme to take over the Alpha Quadrant was nearly complete!

"My god, what an ugly outfit!"

Julian figured he'd be more attractive to Dax if he tried to look more Klingon.

"Oh god, this wig itches!"

 

[NAHTMMM]

"One final word of advice to you before I turn over the station to you, son. Under absolutely no circumstances whatsoever should you leave Doctor Bashir alone near the weapons controls for even a second."

"Sure, Dad. Whatever you say."

"...But, ya know, I'm the station commander now, right? If I tell Bashir not to touch the weapon controls while I step out for a few minutes, he's gotta do what I tell him. And besides, I left Dax with him. She's as responsible as they come, she'll keep a close eye on him."

"Sure, Jake. Whatever you say."

"Here, watch this. A late acquaintance of mine from Starfleet Academy once told me about this really spectacular trick you can do with three photon torpedoes, a pod of antimatter, and a mug of ale. It's quite a delicate operation, but I figure I've handled those before so I'm sure I can pull this one off. This'll be fantastic, I promise. Beam a thirty-kilo pod of antimatter into space at the coordinates I'm sending you, all right?"

"Sure, Julian, whatever you say!"

"What are you staring at?"

"The sensor readouts on your screen. I very much fear that young Sisko has allowed Doctor Bashir access to the weaponry console. And it appears that the consequences are headed in our direction."

"Oh shoo--"

"Well, that didn't turn out very well."

"Didn't you say something about a mug of ale?"

"Hmm? Oh, that's for drinking afterwards."

 

[Kirby]

Bashir: Ehhhh... I just crapped my pants!

Bashir: Ewwww.... I did it again!

 

[Kirby]

Garak: Why yes, I can sew a third leg into your trousers, and I can certainly see why.

 

[Kirby]

Ben: Jake, being on a station like this, you have to get used to dealing with other races and their customs. For instance, on Prylori II, the inhabitants customarily greet each other by grasping each other's shoulders.
Jake: Ok, this is easy.
Ben: And then the shorter one, knees the taller one in the groin. I'll demonstrate....
Jake: No, wait!
Ben: I'm sorry Jake-o, but this is one of those things you are going to have to learn.

 

[Judas Ascendant]

The winners for this round

grabthars hammer said:

Bashir: Alright, that's the LAST time we visit the same salon. Agreed?

AdmiralGarak said:

Gunn: "What do you mean that The Sopranos ended without closure! Who ends a television series right in the middle of the sce..."
{Fade to black}
Gunn (voice): "Joss!"

The Cutest of Borg said:

Trisha Helfer: "I'm really sorry Sid. They were all set to give you the part of Baltar when someone saw your over-acting in The Passenger."

The prize

These really boss James Darren buttons. They're the ginchiest....
So if you are having a problem getting decked out, don't flip your wig, with these buttons you'll always have an accessory or two....

You Dig?? Cause I don't, that's what the butler is for.....

 

[Holytomato]

darn my image copying isn;t working.

#1

Jake: This is what you do. You bring her flowers, candy, and jello.

Odo: And this will cause her to have "makeup sex" with me?

Jake: Absolutely. :snicker:

#2

Jake: Dad?

Dad: No its not. It's me, you from the future!

Jake: Do I become bald?

Dad: Yes! Next question.

Jake: Ok. Do I become an as$hole?

Dad: Yes!

Jake: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH

#3

Worf: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH

Garak: You're supposed to cut off your leg, not put that tribble there.


#4

Dax: Juliiiiiiiiian!!

Julian: Remember, we're in the past. Whoever smelt it dealt it. :snarlingly:

#5

Julian/Dax: Y M C A

#6

Jake: Geez Odo, what happened to you?

Odo: I feel into a blender. What happened to you!?

Jake: I was retconned as Blade, Hiphop artist.