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Dear BBQ Grill Thief:

I've never understood the fascination with grill. I mean, I enjoy my grilled steak as the next guy, but I always found this funny.

That said, I hope you get you stuff back! :techman:
 
iguana_tonante said:
I've never understood the fascination with grill. I mean, I enjoy my grilled steak as the next guy, but I always found this funny.
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Its one of those "if you don't already understand it can't be explained to you" kind of things.

Also, Plecostomus, if you manage to find this guy and, you know, accidentially shoot him twenty times, I think the police will understand how these sorts of accidents happen.
 
Got the grill back shortly after my last post here. They found it across town, a couple of well known scrap-scavenging 315 rednecks took it.

Cops let me slow-smoke them over a bed of poison ivy chips and pressure-treated lumber chunks. I suppose I should take the carcasses off the flag-poll before the neigborhood association complains.
 
Glad you got it back Plecostomus, are you going to press charges and make these bastards pay? Stealing a man's grill is despicable; they already have a special place reserved for them in hell.
 
I am so glad to hear you got it back. I am also very happy to hear that they caught the bums who did this. I HATE THIEVES. Too bad the punishment isn't chopping off their hands or something.
 
Plecostomus said:
Got the grill back shortly after my last post here. They found it across town, a couple of well known scrap-scavenging 315 rednecks took it.

Cops let me slow-smoke them over a bed of poison ivy chips and pressure-treated lumber chunks. I suppose I should take the carcasses off the flag-poll before the neigborhood association complains.
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Good to hear it turned out for you. Scrapers are as annoying as hell. Turn your back for a minute and they'll still anything metal that isn't tied down.

Frankly I'd laugh if thieves took my grill. It developed a gas leak last summer in a spot that if you don't know where to look you'd never know it was there till it was too late (good think I actually an anal-retentive about cooking equipment and know all my gear like the back of my hand). Let the suckers take it, first time they try to light it: Booom
 
Glad you got it back :)

TheGalifreyansith.. should you not.. fix that problem? Incase someone accidently starts using it (suprise bbq) or something?
 
Plecostomus said:
Got the grill back shortly after my last post here. They found it across town, a couple of well known scrap-scavenging 315 rednecks took it.

Cops let me slow-smoke them over a bed of poison ivy chips and pressure-treated lumber chunks. I suppose I should take the carcasses off the flag-poll before the neigborhood association complains.
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Congrat's! And your post literally made me laugh out loud. ;)

But, though it may show my ignorance, I have to ask ..., "315 rednecks"? Would that be a redneck that hasn't quite gotten to "420" yet? Just a guess. ;)
 
Aurian said:
Glad you got it back :)

TheGalifreyansith.. should you not.. fix that problem? Incase someone accidently starts using it (suprise bbq) or something?
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Probably, but no one messes with the cooking-gear but me, and most people are spooked by the thing; my in-laws are convinced I'm going to blow us up. I'll probably scrap it and go back to wood/charcoal.
 
People past Webster in the 315 area-code exchange are considered to be low-life trash. The vast majority of them are. Most 315 women will get pregnant and demand child support if you talk to them too long.

Notice I said the "vast majority?" There are quite a few good folk out here but the scum, trash, morons and rednecks outnumber the good folk five to one in most towns.

Wife and I do not count as we are non-natives. It's a genetic condition caused by decades of inbreeding and lead exposure due to some of the industries in the 315 region.
 
Plecostomus said:
People past Webster in the 315 area-code exchange are considered to be low-life trash. The vast majority of them are. Most 315 women will get pregnant and demand child support if you talk to them too long.

Notice I said the "vast majority?" There are quite a few good folk out here but the scum, trash, morons and rednecks outnumber the good folk five to one in most towns.

Wife and I do not count as we are non-natives. It's a genetic condition caused by decades of inbreeding and lead exposure due to some of the industries in the 315 region.
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I think there's a section of town/city/county everywhere like that.

Around here we had a problem for a while with people stealing copper wires & plumbing out of "abandoned" homes. Hell, if just when on a trip for a couple of days they scavenged your house. The culprits were all from the same "mobile home" park at the far end of the valley.
 
Plecostomus said:
I had a VERY stressful day at work. Was looking forward to coming home and using my special stainless steel custom fabricated tri-mode gas/charcoal grill/steamer/smoker.

Thank you SO MUCH for stealing the one single custom fabricated item on my deck. Yes it is worth about $200 in scrap, but good luck with the scrap yards... I work in The Industry and have connections at the scrap yards. Every single yard within 200 miles... alerted them and faxed photos to them.

Got your face on my camera, a picture of your truck and the police are out looking for you.

This is a miiiiiiinor setback, I have a backup grill. Not as nice but I will not be denied my fire-roasted tube-steaks.

You on the other hand, will be eating freeze-dried ribblets and steamed Lima-beans shortly. It's only a matter of time.

Tell you what, I'll forgive and forget if my grill is place in my driveway tonight. No questions asked. I'll leave the light on and everything. Just put it back and leave quietly.

Thank you for your time, have a good evening. Hope you throw your back out or get pinned under it or something ironic happens.

Sincerely,
Brian Richard
Smalltime Machine
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Hey Brian,

I'm in Connecticut. If I see any suspicious characters hauling grills down my street I'll give you a shout. Maybe he just plans on redistributing it to someone less fortunate than you? ;)
 
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