Oh, I made a mistake. What I meant is that eventually it grows into a 24/7 relationship. In the beginning, they start off as acquaintances.
I really hate to be so cynical about this, but unless you are really careful about showing how this woman
wants this relationship and loves her partner because he knows how to dominate her and not despite of it, I can see the uninformed masses getting a tad upset.
This topic has no chance on network TV with the uninformed masses as viewers anyway. It belongs on premium cable where a sophisticated audience can (and does) accept a lot of shows about socially unacceptable things. In fact, socially unacceptable things are the Hot New Thing on premium and basic cable -
Big Love, Breaking Bad, Sons of Anarchy, Weeds. I'm kind of surprised that premium cable hasn't glommed onto BDSM already (and wouldn't be surprised to learn, either, that they already have a show in the works.)
And your fears are way off base. Look at the shitty way women are treated on
Mad Men, and that show gets awards up the wazoo. And don't get me started on
Big Love, yeekers. It's like
Dexter - we see a serial killer, we get his point of view, but never get the sense that the creators of the show are apologizing for him. There's a difference in depicting something as objective reality in a fictional story and depicting it in a way that signals that the creators of the fiction approve. You need a reasonably sophisticated audience to be sure they can tell the difference, but that's your cable audience so no problem there.
You could create a BDSM show with a male dominant and not "shock" the HBO/Showtime crowd in the least. Your problem will be the opposite - you better shock them a little or risk losing their interest. The bar for "shocking" keeps getting set higher and higher.
Frankly, I'd forget the BDSM idea altogether as insufficiently shocking. Do a show about a cannibal instead: modern-day, urban-dwelling, neighbors don't have a clue.
But if you want to go with BDSM, and you're serious about getting it on TV, do some market research first because my strong hunch is that the market for a show with a male submissive would be much bigger than for a male dominant. Tap into the fantasy lives of more people for better Nielsens, that's the ticket. Throw in some hot lipstick lesbian dominatrices and you're golden.