My old jokes:
How many Kazon does it take to change a light bulb?
"Your old lightbulb has failed. A fitting end for those who would not share their technology. Let us see how you survive without it..."
How many Xindi does it take to change a lighbulb?
"Trying to change a lightbulb is like bargaining with the sun. We make no progress, and we come away burned".
How many Borg does it take to change a light-bulb?
"We are the Borg. Lightbulbs are irrelevant. Changing them is futile. Sunlamps are more efficient. Sunlamps will be assimilated. Their technological distinctiveness will be added to our own. Resistance is futile.
How many Bajorans does it take to change a lightbulb?
"We walk the path of the Prophets. Have faith my child, as we undertake this journey and change this lightbulb....what's this?!....the Cardassians have stolen our light-bulb!"
How many Cardassians does it take to change a light-bulb?
"Loyal Cardassians, today I make this pledge to you. With our superior culture and military strength, we can and will change this lightbulb. So, loyal Cardassians, follow me to victory. For my son, for all our sons!
(LATER):
...We deny all involvement in this plan; it was a lone renegade officer found changing your bulb and he will be punished".
How many Risians does it take to change a light-bulb?
"All that is ours is yours. ..... ....Can we borrow a lighbulb?"
How many Tamarians does it take to change a light-bulb?
"The lightbulb, extinguished. Darmok, in darkness. Darmok at Ikea. Jalad at Ikea. 50% reductions at Ikea. Darmok and Jalad, Uzani, his army at Lashmir! Darmok, with the lightbulb! The light restored.
