Caption Contest 28: subcommander vulcan blues

[Triskelion]

Well alright players, that's all for that contest. Sorry for taking a while to replace it. I've actually been spending most of my bbs time creating a 100 + image photo-art screensaver for Enterprise lovers. I'm nearly finished with it and will be posting it for download soon!

Now I'll be replacing the contest weekly (mostly). I'm going to simplify it a bit to make it a faster & more regular thing, but before I do we can play another game of:


Let's Make a Deal!!!

Alrighty players, behind one of these doors you may win:


A Star Trek Home Makeover!

<Ooooh Aaaaah Murmur Murmur Murmur>


And behind another door you may win:

An all-expenses paid Star Trek Theme Wedding and honeymoon in beautiful Las Vegas, Nevada!

<Ooooh Aaaaah Yada Yada Yada>

(If you can't afford a geek hottie one will be appointed to you).

And now without further ado...
​

First Image:

"J.J.'s Trek movie is kicking ass.

I told Scott and Jolene we shoulda pushed harder to get in that damn thing."

Second Image:

Connor: This again? Why did they create a "T'Pol narcolepsy" story line.

Third Image - a 3 way tie!:

Kolos: "Want some cocoa? It's got marshmallows."

Kolos: Do not fret, human. It happens to Klingons all the time.
Archer: Really?
Kolos: Nah. We are strong like targ.

Kolos: Now I shall read bad poetry and you shall hurl things at me.

Photoshop Award:

Director: You know, Connor, she's gonna kick your ass when she gets up.
Connor: I know, but it was well worth it.

Conner (to cameraman): "Helen Noel she ain't."

Now let's play Let's Make a Deal!

Choose your door!...........
Not that one...
Not that one...
Ok!

You get:

An evening of dance with Scott Bakula!

<Ooooh....>

Each of our captioners will be taking home:


A new fur coat!

<Oooh, uh? Nooo! Booooo!>

...and a year's supply of - ah frak it!



Our next contest comes from Future Tense and features a singing Vulcan, a brain trust, and porn from the future:

_____________________________________________
Start your engines!

 

[Nerys Myk]

T'POL: If you gentlemen are done comparing penis sizes, we have work to do.

 

[Shatmandu]

T'Pol: "Any of you assholes wanna shoot some pool?"

 

[Triskelion]

T'Pol: My heart will go on....!
Archer: Every time we leave spaceport...

Phlox: He's right, Commander. Vulcan DNA.
Archer: And...?
Phlox: And Denobulan.

Archer: Daniels' Myspace page.
<T'Pol sags with ennui>

 

[Captain Crow]

.23
The new Enterprise T'Pol Blow Up Doll.

 

[cooleddie74]

"We need to make a quick stop at New Malawi Colony, Captain.

I need to get a new child."

PHLOX:"Oh, no worries, Mister Reed.

Nothing that can't be cured with a little bed rest, a shot of mild analgesic and coming to sickbay at 1900 hours this evening to give me a handjob."

T'POL:"Incredible.

150 years...and the Trek BBS is still a complete and utter mess."

ARCHER:"Now you understand how and why the 'Shipper Wars of the early 21st century began."

 

[cooleddie74]

"What do you mean...

I'm WIGGING OUT?!"

 

[SFRabid]

T'Pol singing "It's been a long road, getting from there to here...."

Trip whispering to the guys - "She will not stop singing that stupid song. Last night she started singing it when we were, ummm, you know."

T'Pol - "I can hear you, and you will not be inspiring me to sing tonight."

Archer - "3 .. 2 .. 1 .. Hypnosis program complete. That song should now be out of your head.

T'Pol humming - "Do the Hokie Pokie and turn yourself around."

 

[Captain Crow]

BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURP!

Archer: Any ideas on what to do T'Pol?

T'Pol: Captain IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII....

Archer: Oh crap, she's crashed again.

Reed: You're damn right I'm mad! T'Pol has beat my high score on the bridge pinball machine.

Tucker: Captan, I think something is wrong with Reed. He keeps claiming his name is Sam Beckett and he's been talking to himself alot.

 

[Nerys Myk]

Well, shake it up, baby, now, (shake it up, baby)
Twist and shout. (twist and shout)
C'mon c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, baby, now, (come on
baby)
Come on and work it on out. (work it on out)

Well, work it on out, honey. (work it on out)
You know you look so good. (look so good)
You know you got me goin', now, (got me goin')
Just like I knew you would. (like I knew you
would)

 

[Skywalker]

Yay, thanks for the W!

Archer: "T'Pol, run a sensor sweep of the--T'Pol, what's Trip doing underneath your console? T'Pol?"

Phlox: "It's as I suspected. He's English."
Trip: "Poor bastard."
Archer: "Can he be cured?"
Malcolm: "What?!"

Archer: "What the hell!? Why does Trip have more friends on Facebook than me?"

 

[Triskelion]

John: Alright alright, who keeps singing "Kohlinar Rigby"??
T'Pol: Surak to where you once belonged?
Paul: Stop it.
T'Pol: Lucy in the Sky with Dilithium Crystals?
George: Stop.
T'Pol: Fool on the Hill?
Ringo: Sto - hey, that's a good one.
T'Pol: <singing>
"The fool on the hill
Sees the suns going down,
And the superfluous eyelids in his head,
Sees the Minshara-class world spinnin' round!"

<everyone stares at her>

- Too cerebral?
I Wanna Meld Your Brain?
Baby You Can Drive My Pod?
Phlox's Silver Hammer?
While My Pon Farr Gently Weeps?
Back in the USS NX01?

<Crickets chirp, band slowly backs away>

 

[Mach5]

ARCHER: "...And that's why we call it a 'pile driver!'"

 

[Herkimer Jitty]

T'pol: "Beeelaaaayyyyy thaaaaat phaaaaaaaase caaaaaanoooooon oooooordeeeeer!"

Phlox: "According to this medical scan, your nipples have migrated to the back of your eyeballs."

Phlox: "According to this medical scan, Mr. Tucker stuffs the ass end of his uniform with socks."

Trip: "Come on! It's the only way I can compete with T'pol! for 'sexiest crewmember'"

Archer: "Who the hell is 'Riker'? And why does he keep sending me friend requests?"

 

[cooleddie74]

T'Pol couldn't hide the secret anymore.

Trip COULD fit under her science console.

PHLOX:"As I suspected, gentlemen.

Mister Reed IS gay...in addition to being English."

TRIP:"I always thought they were one and the same...huh."

ARCHER:"Damn.

Enterpriser came back to the BBS. Well. There go my evening plans."

 

[cooleddie74]

ARCHER:"This new XBox 9000 just plain kicks ASS.

End of story."

 

[Triskelion]

Archer: Huh. Wet t shirt.
T'Pol: Captain, the Temporal Cold War.
Archer: Huh? About four o'clock.

T'Pol: Would everybody please stop staring at my boobs and get back to work, please? Thank you.
Hoshi <under her breath>: Bitch.

 

[cooleddie74]

ARCHER:"Look at that.

The Ford Pinto eventually makes a comeback. Who knew."

"It's been a lonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnng road..."

 

[bluedana]

Inspired by new movie, T'Pol tries singing along with the Trek: Original Series theme song.

Trip: "No, seriously, does this uniform make my butt look big?"

Archer: No, I think I've figured it out.
T'Pol: Captain, please, just read the manual.
Archer (muttering): Damn. Recording on TIVO used to be so easy.

 

[Nerys Myk]

ARCHER: It's all porn and something called "Star trek"?