BOYCOTT THIS FILM!!!

[Samuel T. Cogley]

Everyone knows that science fiction fans are loathe to jump to outrageous and cynical extremes when it comes to judging something in advance, especially on the internet.

But just in that rare, rare off-chance that you are in that tiny minority of fans, and you have decided in advance what make-or-break element MUST be included in this film, what would that be?

What would make you boycott this film? Leaving something in? Leaving something out?

I thought this might be a good place to collect all of the serious (and not so serious) reasons why people insist that they must boycott the film.

If you see someone giving a reason in another thread, copy it and paste it here, making sure to attribute it to its rightful owner. Or feel free to provide your own, original reason.

(This is not an oportunity to bash other posters or their reasons for not wanting to see the movie. It is just meant to be a Top Ten style list, which should be plenty funny with or without commentary. And half the fun will be guessing if people's reasons are serious or simply outrageous.)

I figure we can collect a fairly hilarious list of reasons between now and the release date of 5/8/2009.

 

[backstept]

SOMBREROS!








(sorry . . . just getting it out of the way early )


but seriously, I don't think there's anything that would change my mind. I will see this movie. I'm prepared to be annoyed by their interpretation of the setting and characters, or some similarly small point of contention, but in the end I'll watch anything with the name 'Star Trek' on it
I love the show, and the whole Trek universe more than any silly difference can possibly upset me. Sappy, yes . . . but true nonetheless.

 

[Swarles Barkley]

They need to replace Robau with Cap'n Crunch or I'm OUT!

 

[Samuel T. Cogley]

"Well if [Nurse Ogawa's] not in it, I'm totally BOYCOTTING THIS FILM." ~ Swarles Barkley

 

[Swarles Barkley]

^^ That too!

Cap'n Crunch, and KEIKOGAWA!

 

[The Doctor]

Absolutely nothing.

I'll be seeing this film no matter what.

 

[number6]

I will sooooo boycott this film if Eddie Paskey doesn't have a cameo.

 

[Stardate]

They need to fix the stupid paper-thin neck section for the new Enterprise.

 

[OneBuckFilms]

It had better have the Enterprise in it, or I'll BOYCOTT THE FILM !!!

The Enterprise is CANON !!!!

 

[Ryan8bit]

I'm boycotting this movie because William Shatner isn't in it. He is the only one who can play Kirk, and anyone who says otherwise is full of bull. In fact, I'm boycotting any Star Trek that doesn't have Shatner in it in some form.

 

[26138]

If the port nacelle of the Enterprise isn't played by William Shatner, I'm boycotting this film!

 

[Garth Rockett]

I doubt very much I would avoid seeing the film at least once. However, I may not see it multiple times if the movie does not include the following:

The Starship Enterprise
Captain James T. Kirk
Mr. Spock
Mr. Spock shouting
Dr. McCoy
Dr. McCoy saying, "Dammit Jim!"
Dr. McCoy saying, "I'm a doctor, not a [insert appropriate non-medical profession here]"
Mr. Scott
Mr. Scott saying, "She cannae take any more!"
Mr. Scott saying, "My poor bairns!"
Lt. Uhura
Lt. Uhura wearing a mini-skirt
Mr. Sulu
Mr. Chekov
Mr. Chekov screaming
The Enterprise traveling at warp speed
Someone setting their phasers on stun
Tribbles

 

[Augustus]

I am boycotting this film because though I barely know anything about it, I have an uncontrollable disposition to hate it already...

 

[archeryguy1701]

I doubt I will right-out boycott it, but if the movie stinks, I will likely boycott repeat viewings.

 

[Ryan8bit]

I doubt I will right-out boycott it, but if the movie stinks, I will likely boycott repeat viewings.

You are giving this film too much chance. Naturally, we should all make up our minds before we see it. Especially because Shatner isn't in it.

 

[ManOnTheWave]

As long as the film isn't about Kirk struggling with drug addiction, or Spock struggling with his sexuality, or McCoy struggling to become the greatest Hip-hop star who ever lived, I think I'll see this film. Everyone knows that's Scotty's story.

 

[archeryguy1701]

I doubt I will right-out boycott it, but if the movie stinks, I will likely boycott repeat viewings.

You are giving this film too much chance. Naturally, we should all make up our minds before we see it. Especially because Shatner isn't in it.

I'm sorry. I'm a lousy fan.

 

[The Wormhole]

I of course am boycotting this movie. Of course, by "boycotting this movie" I really mean I'll just tell everyone that I have no intention of seeing it because it ruins Trek and its fundamental principles, but I will be among the first to see it when it's released. Whenever that is.

Although, if I find out there is no SHOUTING SPOCK it maybe hard to convince me to go.

 

[Therin of Andor]

I'll be there.

 

[jbrinegar]

Bat nipples on uniform