Bad Trek Jokes, Part II

Discussion in 'General Trek Discussion' started by Lord Garth, Jun 12, 2018.

  1. Lord Garth

    Lord Garth Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    I started a thread like this six months ago. Here's another one. Tell your bad Star Trek jokes!

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    "I'm going to find Odo on Genesis." -- Captain Lorca, Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country
     
  2. Tim Thomason

    Tim Thomason Commodore Commodore

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    I'm ashamed to admit, but I don't get it. What's the punchline? How do you break this joke down? Is it just an absurd statement connecting disparate elements across all of Stat Trek?

    I mean, Auberjonois (Odo) was in Star Trek VI, but Isaacs (Lorca) wasn't. The events surrounding Genesis preceded Star Trek VI in the films, but were largely unconnected.

    Is this a DS9 on Sega Genesis joke? Or, perhaps a Harry Potter reference (not that familiar with the franchise)? I'm missing something here, and it frustrates me.

    I like jokes, and I like Star Trek, and I like to think I'm clever enough to get things. But please, Lord Garth, explain what I'm supposed to be seeing here?!
     
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  3. Lord Garth

    Lord Garth Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Have you ever seen those memes on social media? Where there'll be an image of Patrick Stewart and he'll say "Use the force, Harry!" and it'll be signed off as Gandalf? They're jokingly pissing off Star Trek fans, Star Wars fans, Harry Potter fans, and Lord of the Rings fans by combining all four into one.

    Same idea here. I just purposely mismatched DS9 with the TOS Movies and Disco. Maybe it works better as a meme. And if it were easier to post pictures, I'd actually put one up!

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    On another note (showing my age): The Sega Genesis game had some catchy music. Even though all it has is Sisko running around.
     
    Last edited: Jun 12, 2018
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  4. 1001001

    1001001 Boorish Jackass Moderator

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  5. Orac

    Orac Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    Nonsense is not a joke.

    That said, here's my attempt at a nonsensical joke ~

    Knock Knock
    Who's there?
    Bones
    Bones who?
    Bones hurt Spock's feelings when he compared him to a labradoodle.
     
  6. Gavin70

    Gavin70 Commander Red Shirt

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    Here's another good way to destroy the minds of Star Trek, Star Wars, and Doctor Who fans.
    [​IMG]
     
  7. SpocksOddSocks

    SpocksOddSocks Captain Captain

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    Surely every everyone has heard these:

    Q. How many ears does Captain Kirk have?
    A. 3; a left ear, a right ear and a final front ear.

    Q. Why is the Enterprise like toilet paper?
    A. They both circle Uranus looking for Klingons.

    But on the mixed up quote front, "These are not the tribbles you are looking for. Make it so." - Grand Moff Buck Crichton (Stargate: Deep Babylon's 7).
     
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  8. WraithDukat

    WraithDukat Captain Captain

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    Yo Mama so fat the Enterprises original 5 year mission...WAS TO GET AROUND HER!!!

    What does Captain Lorca say when he wants his science specialist to destroy an enemy ship?

    Micheal, Burn 'em!
     
    Last edited: Jun 18, 2018
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  9. The Old Mixer

    The Old Mixer Mih ssim, mih ssim, nam, daed si Xim. Moderator

    If there's more like this, I'll be shutting the thread down before you know it.
     
  10. 1001001

    1001001 Boorish Jackass Moderator

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    And you made that your signature?

    Dude...
     
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  11. hbquikcomjamesl

    hbquikcomjamesl Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

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    This thread is for bad jokes. Not disgusting ones. There's a difference.

    Q: How many Klingons does it take to change a lightbulb?
    A: Klingons do not change lightbulbs. Klingons are not afraid of the dark.

    Q: How many Cardassians does it take to change a lightbulb?
    A: None. They just try to convince you to see five lights when there are only four.

    *****
    Since Lord Garth liked the above, here's one more:

    Q: How many Borg does it take to change a lightbulb?
    A: All of them.

    And here's a B5 lightbulb joke for good measure (the only ST connection is that I told it to Patricia ["Lyta Alexander" from B5] Tallman, who'd made many minor ST appearances, at an autograph table)

    Q: How many Vorlons does it take to change a lightbulb?
    A: Vorlons don't change lightbulbs. Vorlons don't need lightbulbs. Vorlons could get jobs AS lightbulbs.
     
    Last edited: Jun 15, 2018
  12. WraithDukat

    WraithDukat Captain Captain

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    Wow, sorry I offended all your sensibilities. I hope you didn't damage your monocles to much when you dropped them into your tea.
     
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  13. Tim Thomason

    Tim Thomason Commodore Commodore

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    You misspelled Michael. You're a horrible person.
     
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  14. Kai "the spy"

    Kai "the spy" Vice Admiral Admiral

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    How many Founders does it take to change into a lightbulb?
     
  15. at Quark's

    at Quark's Commodore Commodore

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    Are 'bad trek jokes' supposed to be bad jokes about trek? Or jokes about bad trek? Or, just to be on the safe side, bad jokes about bad trek?

    In the last case I wonder what TNG filler episode "50 shades of gray" would have looked like.
     
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  16. WraithDukat

    WraithDukat Captain Captain

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    2, 1 to blame it on solids and 1 to create an army to change it.
     
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  17. Kai "the spy"

    Kai "the spy" Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Read the question again.
     
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  18. Tim Thomason

    Tim Thomason Commodore Commodore

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    I'm not sure it'd involve Riker, since he's only into plain, basic sex.
     
  19. SpocksOddSocks

    SpocksOddSocks Captain Captain

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    One, and many :D
     
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  20. tharpdevenport

    tharpdevenport Admiral Admiral

    Six months is still within the appropriate amount of time to revive the thread. This new one is unnecessary.