I feel kind of sad because I don't have the relationship I feel I should with my half-sister. The story gets a little muddled due to the fact that my dad (whom is also her dad) divorced her mom, and thus threw us all into separating, more than 10 years ago. She stayed with her mother 1,000 miles away from where I moved to, back home with my mom, while my dad went his third way back to his home state.
For 10 years of my sisters life (age 4-14) she hardly knew me and my other sister (her half-sister, my full-sister.) We saw each other every year at Christmas when my dad would bring her down to my Grandmas house, and we would have that time together, but for for the rest of the year I was very stupid (young myself) and did not try to even show any interest in her life growing up.
She has another half-brother, on her mothers side, whom did live with her all those years, and thus they have a close sibling relationship. Me however, she just doesn't. However, I am much older than her, 14 years older to be exact, and as of a few years ago, I wanted to change this. I wanted to get to know her, include her in my life and be involved in her life and her interests.
I genuinely want to develop a strong sibling relationship with her, as I currently have with my other (full-sister) whom I am 5 years apart in age. So, I started making attempts at communicating with her more, staying up to date on happenings in her life, telling her about things in mine.
As of 2 years ago I made the decision to move back up here to where I use to live, and she currently lives. Even odder is that only 6 months ago my other sister also decided to move up here after I did, and now she lives up here too, so all of us siblings are here in the same place. Yet, the relationship we have with our half-sister just isn't what we both hoped it would be.
At first, she was very excited we were up here, and we did a lot of things together, then I guess the newness wore off, and now it is incredibly hard to communicate with her, she just won't talk with us like siblings do. Then there are the trips her mom and her take, and neither me nor my other sister are ever invited or welcomed to go with them, it is as if they are their own little family, and we just aren't included in that. I understand WHY it is this way, but I don't like it, and wish it to change, but of course nothing will happen if the other party isn't willing for it to be that way.
Thus, we are at a standstill as far as the relationship goes. We all live in the same place, only 15 minutes from each other, but yet we live apart, not as a family, not as siblings. It should also be noted that we get along with her mother quite well, she is very nice to us, treats us well, communicates with us frequently. The problem isn't with our previous "step-mother", but rather with our own flesh and blood sister. We just don't have that sibling relationship with her that we should, and sure, it is our fault, but we have a desire for that to be different, and better.
Our hope, is that our 16 year old sister will mature, and accept us both as her siblings at some point in the future. She is young, and will go through many changes, so we hold on to that hope, and in the meantime we are there to help and support her when she needs it, but as it stands right now she just doesn't want to have anything to do with us. It should also be noted we don't call her other half anything, I always make sure we refer to each other as just "sister" and "brother" cause that is how I feel about it.
I kind of just needed to vent, and get that off my chest. I'd like to hear about others troubles, so that I know I'm not alone, and through opening up perhaps I won't be so worried about it, cause I'm a worrier!
For 10 years of my sisters life (age 4-14) she hardly knew me and my other sister (her half-sister, my full-sister.) We saw each other every year at Christmas when my dad would bring her down to my Grandmas house, and we would have that time together, but for for the rest of the year I was very stupid (young myself) and did not try to even show any interest in her life growing up.
She has another half-brother, on her mothers side, whom did live with her all those years, and thus they have a close sibling relationship. Me however, she just doesn't. However, I am much older than her, 14 years older to be exact, and as of a few years ago, I wanted to change this. I wanted to get to know her, include her in my life and be involved in her life and her interests.
I genuinely want to develop a strong sibling relationship with her, as I currently have with my other (full-sister) whom I am 5 years apart in age. So, I started making attempts at communicating with her more, staying up to date on happenings in her life, telling her about things in mine.
As of 2 years ago I made the decision to move back up here to where I use to live, and she currently lives. Even odder is that only 6 months ago my other sister also decided to move up here after I did, and now she lives up here too, so all of us siblings are here in the same place. Yet, the relationship we have with our half-sister just isn't what we both hoped it would be.
At first, she was very excited we were up here, and we did a lot of things together, then I guess the newness wore off, and now it is incredibly hard to communicate with her, she just won't talk with us like siblings do. Then there are the trips her mom and her take, and neither me nor my other sister are ever invited or welcomed to go with them, it is as if they are their own little family, and we just aren't included in that. I understand WHY it is this way, but I don't like it, and wish it to change, but of course nothing will happen if the other party isn't willing for it to be that way.
Thus, we are at a standstill as far as the relationship goes. We all live in the same place, only 15 minutes from each other, but yet we live apart, not as a family, not as siblings. It should also be noted that we get along with her mother quite well, she is very nice to us, treats us well, communicates with us frequently. The problem isn't with our previous "step-mother", but rather with our own flesh and blood sister. We just don't have that sibling relationship with her that we should, and sure, it is our fault, but we have a desire for that to be different, and better.
Our hope, is that our 16 year old sister will mature, and accept us both as her siblings at some point in the future. She is young, and will go through many changes, so we hold on to that hope, and in the meantime we are there to help and support her when she needs it, but as it stands right now she just doesn't want to have anything to do with us. It should also be noted we don't call her other half anything, I always make sure we refer to each other as just "sister" and "brother" cause that is how I feel about it.
I kind of just needed to vent, and get that off my chest. I'd like to hear about others troubles, so that I know I'm not alone, and through opening up perhaps I won't be so worried about it, cause I'm a worrier!
Last edited:
). 
