Any Xena:WP fans on the boards?
- Thread starter JanewayRulz!
- Start date
Glad you liked the Xexer ficCount me in for a Buffy/Angel rewatch.
Personally my favourite season was 3 leading up to Gabby's 'death' in the lava, it's Callisto heavy and that's enough for me.
I think a series based on evil Xena would get a bit boring after a while, maybe one of good Xena vs Evil Xena?
I'm not ignoring act IV, guys, its just I'm taking a small holiday to celebrate a birthday. (Yep, mine.
)I loved season 3 and its "rift". I'm so thankful I watched this series first on DVD so there was "no significant wait" time between the start and end of "the rift". I suspect that was exceedingly painful for you guys who watched it at time of broadcast http://whoosh.org/dates/xwp3_97-98.html .
Evil Xena vs Good Xena?
They did that, they just called it Callisto vs Xena.
Episode 132 season 6 # 20 "Soul Possession"
ACT IV begins:
Xena has just sommersaulted in the pike position off the edge of the opening to the lava pit.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_985.jpg
Ares is in shock and Joxer is beside himself in disbelief.
Joxer: “No-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o!"
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_984.jpg
He turns to the god of war who has caused him unmeasurable grief in these last few months. Remember what Xena told the Amazon kid in the land of the dead when the kid asked her if Gabrielle was a "very good" friend? "She's the only friend."
Joxer: Now you’ve taken away both my best friends-- my only-- the only peopleI know!”
Ares: (Snears as only a god of WAR can snear!) “Right.”
Joxer raises his sword and heroically if stupidly rushes Ares.
Joxer: “Ra-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a!"
Ares winks away and Joxer runs into the cavern wall.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_986.jpg
Joxer: "Ooh!”
****
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_988.jpg
Xena is still falling down the incredibly deep shaft that leads to the lava pit.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1018.jpg
Suddenly we see ARES appear at the bottom of the shaft...
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1023.jpg
... and catch her in his arms. Looking as sly as any bride being carried across the threshold for the first time...
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1028.jpg
...Xena says nothing as she puts her arms around Ares' neck and he wordlessly shrugs before winking them both away.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1031.jpg
They are back in the forest that surrounds the former temple of Dahak and its deadly lavapit.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1039.jpg
Ares: “Get cold feet?”
He sets her down.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1043.jpg
Xena: “More like I got an idea... one that paid off. You know, it always bothered me that you didn’t intervene to save Hope. She was carrying your baby, after all.
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_333cd.htm
Xena: Then you showed up acting all interested in my search for Gabrielle and I knew you had to have something to do with it. I’d just have to play along with your little game to expose the truth.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1040.jpg
Ares: “So, what exactly did you uncover, Xena?”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1049.jpg
Xena: “You saved me from the fall, Ares. There’s no way you didn’t do the same thing for Hope. A wedding in front of the Fates. That was a nice touch. That way, you could prevent me from finding Hope and killing her. But you didn’t just save Hope, did you?
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1055.jpg
Xena: You saved Gabrielle as well. Yes... you thought she’d make a good bargaining chip... knowing that she was the only thing in the world that could induce me to make a deal with you.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1051.jpg
Ares: “That is... some detective work, and you were close, real close, but... not quite.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1073.jpg
Ares: See, Gabrielle made a deal with me. In exchange for saving Hope’s life, she offered me her soul. Yeah, you’re right. It is quite a bargaining chip. Unless we cut a new deal. So, I have Gabrielle’s soul. What could you possibly have that I would exchange for that?”
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_353cd.htm
Xena: “You want my soul.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1082.jpg
Ares: “That could work. I let Gabrielle live, but you must be my wife in your next life. And I guess, seeing as how it was one of those in-front-of-the-Fates kind of deals, that would be forever? Eternity.”
Xena: “And you would let Gabrielle and me live out this life in peace.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1095.jpg
Ares: “OK, sounds like a deal. ’Cause you know... she’d do it for you."
He holds out his hand for the contract Xena is still grasping in her's.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1099.jpg
As he unrolls it to the "signature line" he stops.
Ares: (To Xena) Oop-- thumbprint right here on the bottom line." (With trepidation, Xena applies her thumbprint and her promise to the cotnract)
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1110.jpg
Ares: "Thank you. That didn’t hurt, did it?" (Smug is sooooo unbecoming in a god)
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_362cd.htm
Ares: (Looking at the contract) "And there it is... my free-access pass to your soul. And as long as I have this you’re pretty much mine.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1113.jpg
He rolls the contract up tightly, and sticks it into the back of his waistband for "safe" keeping. Obviously this takes place before the invention of the "bum-bag" AKA "fanny pack"
Xena: “Wait! The other half of the deal. I don’t see Gabrielle.”
Ares: “Oh, I let her go, but you gotta find her. I can’t do everything for ya.”
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_367cd.htm
Xena: “Oh, I’ll find her.”
Ares: (There's no limit to the male god ego, is there!) “Just out of curiosity what would ’a happened here today if I’d really been asking for your hand in marriage no strings attached?”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1119.jpg
Xena's eyes get that sultry hooded look as her right hand goes around Ares' neck and she pulls him into a voice altering, heart stopping kiss.
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_375cd.htm
When she finally pulls away she simply adds...
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1137.jpg
Xena: “Guess you’ll never know. Hm-m.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1142.jpg
Ares: [He backs up hesitatingly, motioning its time for him to go, finally managing to SQUEAK out in a very high pitched tone before he winks away...] “Call me?”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1151.jpg
Now... before all you subtexters get your collective shorts in a twist... as soon as Ares winks away we see Xena turn away and in her LEFT hand we see the rolled up contract she lifted from Ares' waistband during their passionate exchange.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1158.jpg
HUZZAH XENA!!!!!
ACT IV continues:
ACT IV begins:
Xena has just sommersaulted in the pike position off the edge of the opening to the lava pit.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_985.jpg
Ares is in shock and Joxer is beside himself in disbelief.
Joxer: “No-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o!"
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_984.jpg
He turns to the god of war who has caused him unmeasurable grief in these last few months. Remember what Xena told the Amazon kid in the land of the dead when the kid asked her if Gabrielle was a "very good" friend? "She's the only friend."
Joxer: Now you’ve taken away both my best friends-- my only-- the only peopleI know!”
Ares: (Snears as only a god of WAR can snear!) “Right.”
Joxer raises his sword and heroically if stupidly rushes Ares.
Joxer: “Ra-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a!"
Ares winks away and Joxer runs into the cavern wall.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_986.jpg
Joxer: "Ooh!”
****
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_988.jpg
Xena is still falling down the incredibly deep shaft that leads to the lava pit.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1018.jpg
Suddenly we see ARES appear at the bottom of the shaft...
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1023.jpg
... and catch her in his arms. Looking as sly as any bride being carried across the threshold for the first time...
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1028.jpg
...Xena says nothing as she puts her arms around Ares' neck and he wordlessly shrugs before winking them both away.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1031.jpg
They are back in the forest that surrounds the former temple of Dahak and its deadly lavapit.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1039.jpg
Ares: “Get cold feet?”
He sets her down.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1043.jpg
Xena: “More like I got an idea... one that paid off. You know, it always bothered me that you didn’t intervene to save Hope. She was carrying your baby, after all.
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_333cd.htm
Xena: Then you showed up acting all interested in my search for Gabrielle and I knew you had to have something to do with it. I’d just have to play along with your little game to expose the truth.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1040.jpg
Ares: “So, what exactly did you uncover, Xena?”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1049.jpg
Xena: “You saved me from the fall, Ares. There’s no way you didn’t do the same thing for Hope. A wedding in front of the Fates. That was a nice touch. That way, you could prevent me from finding Hope and killing her. But you didn’t just save Hope, did you?
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1055.jpg
Xena: You saved Gabrielle as well. Yes... you thought she’d make a good bargaining chip... knowing that she was the only thing in the world that could induce me to make a deal with you.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1051.jpg
Ares: “That is... some detective work, and you were close, real close, but... not quite.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1073.jpg
Ares: See, Gabrielle made a deal with me. In exchange for saving Hope’s life, she offered me her soul. Yeah, you’re right. It is quite a bargaining chip. Unless we cut a new deal. So, I have Gabrielle’s soul. What could you possibly have that I would exchange for that?”
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_353cd.htm
Xena: “You want my soul.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1082.jpg
Ares: “That could work. I let Gabrielle live, but you must be my wife in your next life. And I guess, seeing as how it was one of those in-front-of-the-Fates kind of deals, that would be forever? Eternity.”
Xena: “And you would let Gabrielle and me live out this life in peace.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1095.jpg
Ares: “OK, sounds like a deal. ’Cause you know... she’d do it for you."
He holds out his hand for the contract Xena is still grasping in her's.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1099.jpg
As he unrolls it to the "signature line" he stops.
Ares: (To Xena) Oop-- thumbprint right here on the bottom line." (With trepidation, Xena applies her thumbprint and her promise to the cotnract)
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1110.jpg
Ares: "Thank you. That didn’t hurt, did it?" (Smug is sooooo unbecoming in a god)
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_362cd.htm
Ares: (Looking at the contract) "And there it is... my free-access pass to your soul. And as long as I have this you’re pretty much mine.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1113.jpg
He rolls the contract up tightly, and sticks it into the back of his waistband for "safe" keeping. Obviously this takes place before the invention of the "bum-bag" AKA "fanny pack"
Xena: “Wait! The other half of the deal. I don’t see Gabrielle.”
Ares: “Oh, I let her go, but you gotta find her. I can’t do everything for ya.”
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_367cd.htm
Xena: “Oh, I’ll find her.”
Ares: (There's no limit to the male god ego, is there!) “Just out of curiosity what would ’a happened here today if I’d really been asking for your hand in marriage no strings attached?”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1119.jpg
Xena's eyes get that sultry hooded look as her right hand goes around Ares' neck and she pulls him into a voice altering, heart stopping kiss.
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_375cd.htm
When she finally pulls away she simply adds...
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1137.jpg
Xena: “Guess you’ll never know. Hm-m.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1142.jpg
Ares: [He backs up hesitatingly, motioning its time for him to go, finally managing to SQUEAK out in a very high pitched tone before he winks away...] “Call me?”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1151.jpg
Now... before all you subtexters get your collective shorts in a twist... as soon as Ares winks away we see Xena turn away and in her LEFT hand we see the rolled up contract she lifted from Ares' waistband during their passionate exchange.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1158.jpg
HUZZAH XENA!!!!!
ACT IV continues:
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well have a good birthday.
Thanks Tim.
It was a lovely weekend until Irene showed up and spoiled the last part. Oh well, at least I got act IV started.
That's a difficult question, and one TPTB never really explained. Perhaps they were saving it for the telemovie?
I think Ares as a presence had been around Xena since she left the Norse lands and her encounter with Odin. Being able to trick the KING of the Norse Gods undoubtably brought her to Ares attention.
Sometime after stealing the Rhinegold and imprisoning Grunhilda, Ares made his presence known and when he was pleasantly surprised by Xena he gave her the dark chakram.
IIRC, it wasn't until she was imprisoned in season 1 that Xena actually MET Ares. I think, after the way she handled Odin, Ares was a little afraid of her and kept himself far from her clutches.
Ahhh, found it. "The Reckoning"
Ares: “You're probably wondering who I am.”
Xena: “No, I know who you are, Ares, god of war.”
Ares: “Very good. I should have known you'd figure it out. Who else could outfight your sword?”
The Hooded Being now comes toward her and pulls off his hood as he does so. He is tall, lithe, dark-haired and sophisticatedly handsome. He's neither slithery nor a creep. Worst of all, even we may find some charismatic charm in him.
Ares: “Behold, your former mentor, and still greatest fan at your service.”
Xena: “I used to wonder what you look like.”
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This is what happens when you start searching X/A vids.
They keep coming, and coming and...
Whoa!
A shipper vid for shippers who don't believe Xena means "No" when she says "No".
I love this next song... and I like the way they've used the eternal "triangle" of X/A/G to illustrate it.
They keep coming, and coming and...
Whoa!
A shipper vid for shippers who don't believe Xena means "No" when she says "No".
I love this next song... and I like the way they've used the eternal "triangle" of X/A/G to illustrate it.
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Oops!
I forgot to include my "FIN foreshadowing" alert to that last scene...
Wow... ain't that the truth!
I forgot to include my "FIN foreshadowing" alert to that last scene...
Wow... ain't that the truth!
well have a good birthday.
Thanks Tim.
It was a lovely weekend until Irene showed up and spoiled the last part. Oh well, at least I got act IV started.
Absolutely, happy birthday and best wishes on the post-storm clean up
well have a good birthday.
Thanks Tim.
It was a lovely weekend until Irene showed up and spoiled the last part. Oh well, at least I got act IV started.
Absolutely, happy birthday and best wishes on the post-storm clean up
Thanks!
Luckily the only "cleanup" for me is pumping the water out of the basement. "Go sump pump, go!"
Talk about "FIN foreshadowing...
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300 miles away, and yet the two bridges that unite our little town are now closed due to possible storm damage. What was a 1.2 mile drive is now a 9 mile drive to find a safe bridge. I've now seen our little river make 2 of its last three high water records, 2011, 1995 and 1856. 
Here's a reminder that Gabrielle isn't the "only" third wheel in the relationship with Xena and Ares!
Here's a reminder that Gabrielle isn't the "only" third wheel in the relationship with Xena and Ares!
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Ohhhhhh, he ADMITTED that he fantasized about Xena & Gabrielle... remember this scene in season 6's "The God you know"?
Xena as "Saba": (To Caligula) "You have no idea. And now-- let us entertain you."
http://mikes-images.com/eps/tgyk/pages/tgyk_mq_217cd.htm (The gloved hand on his chest belongs to Gabrielle. )
Ares: "You know I have fantasized about this in a hundred
different situations, I've gotta tell ya, I never got to this
scenario."
http://mikes-images.com/eps/tgyk/pages/tgyk_mq_232cd.htm
Xena: "Well, enjoy it while you can 'cause in about 30 seconds all hell is gonna break loose."
Not the right ep, but does have the right people! (Please, folks, stop flipping the video clips from left to right. Xena looks funny with her sword and chakram on the wrong side. Yessss, I KNOW Rob Tapert did it ONCE in "Paradise Found", but he HAD to correct a sight line issue. You don't have that excuse. )
Has many clips from the right ep, but "only" 2 of the 3 people.
Ares & Gabrielle:
Xena as "Saba": (To Caligula) "You have no idea. And now-- let us entertain you."
http://mikes-images.com/eps/tgyk/pages/tgyk_mq_217cd.htm (The gloved hand on his chest belongs to Gabrielle.
)Ares: "You know I have fantasized about this in a hundred
different situations, I've gotta tell ya, I never got to this
scenario."
http://mikes-images.com/eps/tgyk/pages/tgyk_mq_232cd.htm
Xena: "Well, enjoy it while you can 'cause in about 30 seconds all hell is gonna break loose."
Not the right ep, but does have the right people! (Please, folks, stop flipping the video clips from left to right. Xena looks funny with her sword and chakram on the wrong side. Yessss, I KNOW Rob Tapert did it ONCE in "Paradise Found", but he HAD to correct a sight line issue. You don't have that excuse.
)Has many clips from the right ep, but "only" 2 of the 3 people.
Ares & Gabrielle:
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I THOUGHT you would approve!
Ares fantasy # 147
More appropriate to the current ep.
I just think this is so funny, especially since it should be "Ares" singing.
Jolene:
Ares fantasy # 147
More appropriate to the current ep.
I just think this is so funny, especially since it should be "Ares" singing.
Jolene:
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Episode 132 season 6 # 20 "Soul Possessions"
ACT IV concludes:
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_378cd.htm
Xena has just stolen the wedding contract from Afres, and makes off with it before he can put it into effect.
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_379cd.htm
Dr. Delaney’s Voice: “Xena made off with the contract.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1160.jpg
Dr. Delaney’s Voice: She hid it inside another scroll the one I’ve been reading from the one that was authored by Joxer and hid it at the bottom of the Ionian Sea to prevent Ares from claiming her as his bride in an afterlife.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1164.jpg
We watch as Xena surfaces in the Ionian sea and then climb up the cliff to stand by Joxer's side.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1168.jpg
Joxer: “Here.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1177.jpg
He hands Xena a dry cloth which she uses to dry out her ear as they leave the cliff side.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1180.jpg
Dr. Delaney’s Voice: “As we know, Gabrielle and Xena were reunited in Poteidaia.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1181.jpg
We watch a flash back to the woods outside of Potadiea where Xena meets the real Gabrielle in "A Family Affair".
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1182.jpg
Be aware of something "interesting"...
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1186.jpg
TPTB have REWRITTEN what Xena says to Gabrielle when they first meet!
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1189.jpg
Xena: “Gabrielle? Hey-y-y." [Whispers] "Oh, sweetheart... I’m so sorry.”
Dr. Delaney’s Voice: (Overlays the scene of Xena & Gabrielle's Potadiea clinch) “And I am happy to say that Ares never did locate the scroll-- ”
Scene switches back to the present.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1193.jpg
Dr. Delaney: (Thrusts the contract into the air) “... we got to it first!”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1195.jpg
Audience: [Cheers] “Look this way! Look this way!”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1198.jpg
Suddenly we hear a crash and a black motorcycle forces its way past the double doors and into the room. The rider, also dressed all in black, rides up the center aisle before parking his beast. I love the license plate... "RDHOG".
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1209.jpg
The man in black pulls off his helmet with the tinted face shield, and we finally see the 21st century version of ARES: God Of War. Actually, he looks more like a greased/slicked back version of a 1950's bad boy, but we won't go there.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1226.jpg
Ares: “First, second? What does it matter? It’s mine now.” [Chuckles as he steps off the bike. He turns back to his bike and takes out a remote. Pointing at the bike, he clicks it and the bike disappears. THAT must safe him a ton of time, looking for parking spaces!]
Mistress Ceremonies: (Whispers to Dr Delaney) “Did you schedule any celebrity appearances?”
Dr. Delaney: “Well, we contacted Bruce Campbell, but he was too much money.”
On the other side of the room, two "women" regroup.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1238.jpg
Mattie: “Harry was right.”
Annie: (Are Joxer's memories starting to bleed through?) “Matching the thumbprint on the contract is all Ares needs to claim Xena as his own.”
Mattie: “Where the hell is Harry?”
Scene switches to the mens room and we see Harry's ankles behind the bathroom stall door.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1239.jpg
Harry: [Passing flatus] “Dear, God! Not again! Oh-h-h-h-h!”
Meanwhile, back at the press conference ... Mattie pulls Annie along to face off against Ares.
Mattie: (To Annie) “Come on." (She's blocking Ares path to the podium and Dr Delaney) "Hold on, Man.”
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_394cd.htm
Ares: “Oh... Sidekick and the comic relief. This oughtta be good.”
Mattie: (Getting a little attitude!) “I don’t appreciate being called the sidekick.”
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_395cd.htm
Ares: “Don’t blame me.”
Annie: “Listen, Mr. Harbinger of Doom... we’re not gonna let you get away with this.”
Ares seems to turn away to consider this new obstacle, then quickly wheels back with a right cross, taking out BOTH Annie and Mattie with 1 continuous punch. They fly through the air and land on a couple of C.H.A.K.R.A.M. stooges. I think one was the uptight witch, the Mistress of Ceremonies.
Ares: “OK." (He looks up to the podium and the quaking Dr Delaney, still holding the ancient contract)
Ares: "Hey there. May I?" (Delaney hands over the contract, but doesn't leave the podium.)
Ares: "Thank you." (He leans down and smiles sickly at the little man) "Leave quickly.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1276.jpg
Dr. Delaney: (His feet finally catch a clue and he RUNS away... quite UNheroically, if you ask me. ) “Ah-h-h-h-h-h! Hel-l-l-l-lp! Hel-l-lp me!”
SOMEBODY has finally entered the room.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1304.jpg
Harry: “Hold it right there, Ares.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1287.jpg
Ares: “Xena! Just in time. I have been waiting an eternity-- for this. I guess-- this makes me your [As James Brown]-- Heh! Ooh! Good God!
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1295.jpg
Ares: [Normal Voice] soul man. [Laughs] Once I renew... my signature.”
Harry: “Over my dead spirit.”
And suddenly he's flipping down the aisle at the stage where he confronts Ares.
[Fight]
Harry: “Oop.”
Harry falls to the floor between Mattie and Annie, completely knocked out.
Mattie: “Harry? Harry.”
Annie’s Voice: (Just a little perturbed) “Wake up.”
Mattie: (Well, if one name doesn't work, try another.) “Xena?”
Annie: “Hey.” (She pokes him in the shoulder, to no effect.)
Well, maybe not "no" effect, as Ares is now looking at his "prize" lying dead to the world on the floor.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1353.jpg
He places his thumb on the contract and we see a ghostly REALLY pissed off XENA: LEATHER CLAD WARRIOR PRINCESS sit up from Harry's body.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1358.jpg
Interestingly, Annie and Mattie can also see her.
Then we see a bumbling Joxer materialize from Annie's body.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1373.jpg
Ares: “Xena’s soul in that body for an eternity? This I did not bargain for."
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1360.jpg
Ares: I want Xena’s soul in Xena’s body. All right! Everybody gets their proper souls back."
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1392.jpg
He ZAPS the spirits which seem to swirl not only from Annie to Harry and vice a versa,
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1394.jpg
but they also seem to knock Mattie's consciousness in the process too.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1399.jpg
Ares: "Let’s try that again."
He applies his thumbprint once more to the contract, and we see XENA: WARRIOR PRINCESS stand up from the kneeling Annies's body. More interestingly we see ANNIE jump up and the Xena consciousness appears to take hold...
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1410.jpg
Ares: "Now that-- I can live with forever.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1419.jpg
Ares: Hey, Sugar.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1427.jpg
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1423.jpg
"Annie... AKA XENA: WARRIOR PRINCESS takes off her glasses and smiles that wonderful disdainful SNEAR.
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_423cd.htm
Xena-in-Annie: “Oh, no, you’re not taking this body. This one works much better.”
[Fight]
Ares: “To the moon, Xena!" (He knocks her across the room, landing her across the seats of a row of chairs and conference attendees. Ares then looks down on that "sidekick" he so easily dismissed 5 minutes ago.)
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1449.jpg
Ares: "Hey, I was just wondering, Gabrielle, what’s it like to have the person who gave up her life for you, just lose hers forever?”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1469.jpg
He seems to have forgotten that XENA wasn't the only spirit that was awakened by that "thumbprint". She looks around, spies a microphone stand and grabs it to use it on Ares, and use it QUITE effectively if I do say so myself! Evetnually the GOD OF WAR uses it on Gabrielle and SHE goes flying across the room to land in the middle of a bunch of empty chairs.
Harry... or the man who is NOW Joxer, finally comes to and stands up to fight for his woman. Don't ask me which one is his woman... ask Saturn5!
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1479.jpg
Joxer-in-Harry: (He swings at Ares, from behind... where's Dr Delaney when you need him?) “Uh". (Ares grabs his fist and squeezes it unmercifully) Ah-h-h-h-h-h-h!”
Ares: (Snears as only Ares can) “You would strike a man from behind?”
Joxer-in-Harry: “Ow! Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-h-h-h-h-h! Wait! Oh! Ow.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1502.jpg
And Ares throws the hapless friend across the stage sending him headfirst through the wall, knocking him out!
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1503.jpg
Xena-in-Annie: “Workin’ out the bugs.”
Xena has finally disentangled herself from the chairs and their occupants and is flexing her fingers in an attempt to wake them up before rushing the stage where she eventually throws the God of War to the floor.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1520.jpg
Ares: (From his position on his backside, he offers this seductive entreaty) “Oh, Baby... is that any way to treat an old flame?”
Xena-in-Annie: “It’s time this flame was extinguished.”
Before she can rush Ares again, he lets loose a firebolt which she dodges with a leaping somersault. Good thing too, since it creates a basketball sized HOLE in the wall behind her!
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1549.jpg
Across the room, Gabrielle is trying to get herself disentangled.
Gabrielle: “Oh-h-h-h-h. Ah-ah-ah-ah-h-h-h-h.”
Xena has been thrown yet again across the room and into the podium where she sees two scrolls. She reads from the first one she picks up...
Xena-in-Annie: “‘Sun-kissed buttock.’”
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_434cd.htm
And realizes THAT isn't the one she wants, so she grabs the OTHER scroll, the one with the marriage contract and stuffs it down her shirt. (Now, speaking as a woman... THAT's actually hard to do without ruining the lay of the blouse... and how Xena does it???? Well, lets just say its "a mystery" and leave it at that, okay?)
Ares: “You love it, right? Yeah. Who-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-oa!”
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_436cd.htm
And the FIGHT goes on.. and on as these two go at it with swords left conveniently on the stage by the C.H.A.K.R.A.M. stooges.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1632.jpg
Joxer finally wakes up but I can't figure out what's most upsetting, having his head stuck in a wall or having his stomach full of "gas".
Joxer-in-Harry: “Oh, no. I’m stuck! Ah-h-h-h!”
Ares: “Come on!”
Xena-in-Annie: “Come on, Ares!”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1715.jpg
(This part soooo makes me think of the end of GALAXY QUEST http://www.motifake.com/image/demot...-star-tr-demotivational-poster-1248602467.jpg )
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_443cd.htm
He starts throwing fire balls after fireballs at Xena as she runs along 2 walls at the back of the stage, eliciting a the typical jaded fan comment.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1719.jpg
XenaFan 1: “Hey! What’s wrong with the special effects?”
XenaFan 2: “Yeah, they’re really cheesy.”
Ares: “Stay right there."
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1722.jpg
... finally Xena is standing her ground for his last shot.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1726.jpg
Unfortunately for him... she did stay still...
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1727.jpg
until the LAST MOMENT when she sidestepped his aim
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_447cd.htm
and held his marriage contract in front of the flamming ball of godliness.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1742.jpg
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1753.jpg
Ares: Un-freakin’-believable!”
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_448cd.htm
Xena in Annie: (She flicks the remaining edge of the burned contract up for all to see.) “Ares made it. Ares destroyed it. Guess this means you ain’t got no soul. Ow!”
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_449cd.htm
Ares: “You might ’a won the battle, Xena-- but I’ll win the war. Until next time, Xena.”
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_451cd.htm
Xena-in-Annie: “Oh, you think there’s gonna be one?"
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_449cd.htm
And KEVIN SMITH winks away... One Final Time.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1780.jpg
After Ares winks away, Xena notices Joxer is still stuck in the wall.
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_456cd.htm
Xena: Joxer! (Joxer pulls his head out of the wall, turns around and then falls to the floor) Joxer. Joxer. Come on. Are you all right?”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1791.jpg
She helps her old friend to stand up.
Joxer-in-Harry: “Fine, fine. It’s... just my head.”
And finally... Gabrielle has arrived on the stage. But before she can check out Joxer, she is struck by the vision that IS Xena.
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_459cd.htm
Gabrielle: (She looks HER old friend up and down, with a smile) “Xena... no matter how hard Ares has tried, he has never been able to break us up.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1802.jpg
Now... what you have to look at is JOXER's face in the background. He says nothing. He DOES nothing, except look from one woman to the other and back again, with his mouth hanging open. I know what Saturn5 thinks is going through Joxer's mind right now... and I agree. Joxer is accessing his memories from Harry's life. You remember Harry right? The guy who lived with and bedded Annie regularly until they broke up and he MARRIED and bedded Mattie regularly. I was quite surprised that Joxer didn't collapse from sensory overload right there!
Xena-in-Annie: “And he never will, I promise.”
Joxer-in-Harry: “Yeah-- because-- ”
Xena-in-Annie: (She puts her arm across Gabrielle's shoulders) “What do you say we call it a day?”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1817.jpg
Gabrielle: “All right.”
Joxer-in-Harry: (He's straightening out his suitcoat as they walk away) “Sounds good.”
Xena-in-Annie: (Now you realize that this IS Xena, seeing Gabrielle for the first time in 2 millenia) “You know, I liked ya better blonde, but I can go with this.”
Gabrielle: (Smiles) “Thanks.” (Can a bottle of Miss Clairol be in her future?)
Joxer-in-Harry: “Hey, anything I gotta know about this new body of mine?”
Xena-in-Annie: (Oh yeahhhhh, THIS is OUR Xena!) “Yeah... don’t stray too far from the bathroom.”
And she walks out of view with Gabrielle at her side, leaving Joxer the scene stealer to wrap up the final ep before the storm hits.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1823.jpg
Joxer-in-Harry: [Flatus attack commences] “Oh! Dear God! What did you eat?! Oh! Out of the way!”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1829.jpg
I've loved you before:
ACT IV concludes:
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_378cd.htm
Xena has just stolen the wedding contract from Afres, and makes off with it before he can put it into effect.
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_379cd.htm
Dr. Delaney’s Voice: “Xena made off with the contract.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1160.jpg
Dr. Delaney’s Voice: She hid it inside another scroll the one I’ve been reading from the one that was authored by Joxer and hid it at the bottom of the Ionian Sea to prevent Ares from claiming her as his bride in an afterlife.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1164.jpg
We watch as Xena surfaces in the Ionian sea and then climb up the cliff to stand by Joxer's side.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1168.jpg
Joxer: “Here.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1177.jpg
He hands Xena a dry cloth which she uses to dry out her ear as they leave the cliff side.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_2/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1180.jpg
Dr. Delaney’s Voice: “As we know, Gabrielle and Xena were reunited in Poteidaia.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1181.jpg
We watch a flash back to the woods outside of Potadiea where Xena meets the real Gabrielle in "A Family Affair".
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1182.jpg
Be aware of something "interesting"...
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1186.jpg
TPTB have REWRITTEN what Xena says to Gabrielle when they first meet!
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1189.jpg
Xena: “Gabrielle? Hey-y-y." [Whispers] "Oh, sweetheart... I’m so sorry.”
Dr. Delaney’s Voice: (Overlays the scene of Xena & Gabrielle's Potadiea clinch) “And I am happy to say that Ares never did locate the scroll-- ”
Scene switches back to the present.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1193.jpg
Dr. Delaney: (Thrusts the contract into the air) “... we got to it first!”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1195.jpg
Audience: [Cheers] “Look this way! Look this way!”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1198.jpg
Suddenly we hear a crash and a black motorcycle forces its way past the double doors and into the room. The rider, also dressed all in black, rides up the center aisle before parking his beast. I love the license plate... "RDHOG".
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1209.jpg
The man in black pulls off his helmet with the tinted face shield, and we finally see the 21st century version of ARES: God Of War. Actually, he looks more like a greased/slicked back version of a 1950's bad boy, but we won't go there.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1226.jpg
Ares: “First, second? What does it matter? It’s mine now.” [Chuckles as he steps off the bike. He turns back to his bike and takes out a remote. Pointing at the bike, he clicks it and the bike disappears. THAT must safe him a ton of time, looking for parking spaces!]
Mistress Ceremonies: (Whispers to Dr Delaney) “Did you schedule any celebrity appearances?”
Dr. Delaney: “Well, we contacted Bruce Campbell, but he was too much money.”
On the other side of the room, two "women" regroup.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1238.jpg
Mattie: “Harry was right.”
Annie: (Are Joxer's memories starting to bleed through?) “Matching the thumbprint on the contract is all Ares needs to claim Xena as his own.”
Mattie: “Where the hell is Harry?”
Scene switches to the mens room and we see Harry's ankles behind the bathroom stall door.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1239.jpg
Harry: [Passing flatus] “Dear, God! Not again! Oh-h-h-h-h!”
Meanwhile, back at the press conference ... Mattie pulls Annie along to face off against Ares.
Mattie: (To Annie) “Come on." (She's blocking Ares path to the podium and Dr Delaney) "Hold on, Man.”
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_394cd.htm
Ares: “Oh... Sidekick and the comic relief. This oughtta be good.”
Mattie: (Getting a little attitude!) “I don’t appreciate being called the sidekick.”
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_395cd.htm
Ares: “Don’t blame me.”
Annie: “Listen, Mr. Harbinger of Doom... we’re not gonna let you get away with this.”
Ares seems to turn away to consider this new obstacle, then quickly wheels back with a right cross, taking out BOTH Annie and Mattie with 1 continuous punch. They fly through the air and land on a couple of C.H.A.K.R.A.M. stooges. I think one was the uptight witch, the Mistress of Ceremonies.
Ares: “OK." (He looks up to the podium and the quaking Dr Delaney, still holding the ancient contract)
Ares: "Hey there. May I?" (Delaney hands over the contract, but doesn't leave the podium.)
Ares: "Thank you." (He leans down and smiles sickly at the little man) "Leave quickly.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1276.jpg
Dr. Delaney: (His feet finally catch a clue and he RUNS away... quite UNheroically, if you ask me. ) “Ah-h-h-h-h-h! Hel-l-l-l-lp! Hel-l-lp me!”
SOMEBODY has finally entered the room.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1304.jpg
Harry: “Hold it right there, Ares.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1287.jpg
Ares: “Xena! Just in time. I have been waiting an eternity-- for this. I guess-- this makes me your [As James Brown]-- Heh! Ooh! Good God!
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1295.jpg
Ares: [Normal Voice] soul man. [Laughs] Once I renew... my signature.”
Harry: “Over my dead spirit.”
And suddenly he's flipping down the aisle at the stage where he confronts Ares.
[Fight]
Harry: “Oop.”
Harry falls to the floor between Mattie and Annie, completely knocked out.
Mattie: “Harry? Harry.”
Annie’s Voice: (Just a little perturbed) “Wake up.”
Mattie: (Well, if one name doesn't work, try another.) “Xena?”
Annie: “Hey.” (She pokes him in the shoulder, to no effect.)
Well, maybe not "no" effect, as Ares is now looking at his "prize" lying dead to the world on the floor.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1353.jpg
He places his thumb on the contract and we see a ghostly REALLY pissed off XENA: LEATHER CLAD WARRIOR PRINCESS sit up from Harry's body.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1358.jpg
Interestingly, Annie and Mattie can also see her.
Then we see a bumbling Joxer materialize from Annie's body.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1373.jpg
Ares: “Xena’s soul in that body for an eternity? This I did not bargain for."
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1360.jpg
Ares: I want Xena’s soul in Xena’s body. All right! Everybody gets their proper souls back."
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1392.jpg
He ZAPS the spirits which seem to swirl not only from Annie to Harry and vice a versa,
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1394.jpg
but they also seem to knock Mattie's consciousness in the process too.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1399.jpg
Ares: "Let’s try that again."
He applies his thumbprint once more to the contract, and we see XENA: WARRIOR PRINCESS stand up from the kneeling Annies's body. More interestingly we see ANNIE jump up and the Xena consciousness appears to take hold...
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1410.jpg
Ares: "Now that-- I can live with forever.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1419.jpg
Ares: Hey, Sugar.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1427.jpg
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1423.jpg
"Annie... AKA XENA: WARRIOR PRINCESS takes off her glasses and smiles that wonderful disdainful SNEAR.
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_423cd.htm
Xena-in-Annie: “Oh, no, you’re not taking this body. This one works much better.”
[Fight]
Ares: “To the moon, Xena!" (He knocks her across the room, landing her across the seats of a row of chairs and conference attendees. Ares then looks down on that "sidekick" he so easily dismissed 5 minutes ago.)
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1449.jpg
Ares: "Hey, I was just wondering, Gabrielle, what’s it like to have the person who gave up her life for you, just lose hers forever?”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1469.jpg
He seems to have forgotten that XENA wasn't the only spirit that was awakened by that "thumbprint". She looks around, spies a microphone stand and grabs it to use it on Ares, and use it QUITE effectively if I do say so myself! Evetnually the GOD OF WAR uses it on Gabrielle and SHE goes flying across the room to land in the middle of a bunch of empty chairs.
Harry... or the man who is NOW Joxer, finally comes to and stands up to fight for his woman. Don't ask me which one is his woman... ask Saturn5!
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1479.jpg
Joxer-in-Harry: (He swings at Ares, from behind... where's Dr Delaney when you need him?) “Uh". (Ares grabs his fist and squeezes it unmercifully) Ah-h-h-h-h-h-h!”
Ares: (Snears as only Ares can) “You would strike a man from behind?”
Joxer-in-Harry: “Ow! Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-h-h-h-h-h! Wait! Oh! Ow.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1502.jpg
And Ares throws the hapless friend across the stage sending him headfirst through the wall, knocking him out!
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1503.jpg
Xena-in-Annie: “Workin’ out the bugs.”
Xena has finally disentangled herself from the chairs and their occupants and is flexing her fingers in an attempt to wake them up before rushing the stage where she eventually throws the God of War to the floor.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1520.jpg
Ares: (From his position on his backside, he offers this seductive entreaty) “Oh, Baby... is that any way to treat an old flame?”
Xena-in-Annie: “It’s time this flame was extinguished.”
Before she can rush Ares again, he lets loose a firebolt which she dodges with a leaping somersault. Good thing too, since it creates a basketball sized HOLE in the wall behind her!
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1549.jpg
Across the room, Gabrielle is trying to get herself disentangled.
Gabrielle: “Oh-h-h-h-h. Ah-ah-ah-ah-h-h-h-h.”
Xena has been thrown yet again across the room and into the podium where she sees two scrolls. She reads from the first one she picks up...
Xena-in-Annie: “‘Sun-kissed buttock.’”
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_434cd.htm
And realizes THAT isn't the one she wants, so she grabs the OTHER scroll, the one with the marriage contract and stuffs it down her shirt. (Now, speaking as a woman... THAT's actually hard to do without ruining the lay of the blouse... and how Xena does it???? Well, lets just say its "a mystery" and leave it at that, okay?)
Ares: “You love it, right? Yeah. Who-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-oa!”
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_436cd.htm
And the FIGHT goes on.. and on as these two go at it with swords left conveniently on the stage by the C.H.A.K.R.A.M. stooges.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1632.jpg
Joxer finally wakes up but I can't figure out what's most upsetting, having his head stuck in a wall or having his stomach full of "gas".
Joxer-in-Harry: “Oh, no. I’m stuck! Ah-h-h-h!”
Ares: “Come on!”
Xena-in-Annie: “Come on, Ares!”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1715.jpg
(This part soooo makes me think of the end of GALAXY QUEST http://www.motifake.com/image/demot...-star-tr-demotivational-poster-1248602467.jpg )
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_443cd.htm
He starts throwing fire balls after fireballs at Xena as she runs along 2 walls at the back of the stage, eliciting a the typical jaded fan comment.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1719.jpg
XenaFan 1: “Hey! What’s wrong with the special effects?”
XenaFan 2: “Yeah, they’re really cheesy.”
Ares: “Stay right there."
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1722.jpg
... finally Xena is standing her ground for his last shot.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1726.jpg
Unfortunately for him... she did stay still...
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1727.jpg
until the LAST MOMENT when she sidestepped his aim
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_447cd.htm
and held his marriage contract in front of the flamming ball of godliness.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1742.jpg
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1753.jpg
Ares: Un-freakin’-believable!”
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_448cd.htm
Xena in Annie: (She flicks the remaining edge of the burned contract up for all to see.) “Ares made it. Ares destroyed it. Guess this means you ain’t got no soul. Ow!”
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_449cd.htm
Ares: “You might ’a won the battle, Xena-- but I’ll win the war. Until next time, Xena.”
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_451cd.htm
Xena-in-Annie: “Oh, you think there’s gonna be one?"
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_449cd.htm
And KEVIN SMITH winks away... One Final Time.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1780.jpg
After Ares winks away, Xena notices Joxer is still stuck in the wall.
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_456cd.htm
Xena: Joxer! (Joxer pulls his head out of the wall, turns around and then falls to the floor) Joxer. Joxer. Come on. Are you all right?”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1791.jpg
She helps her old friend to stand up.
Joxer-in-Harry: “Fine, fine. It’s... just my head.”
And finally... Gabrielle has arrived on the stage. But before she can check out Joxer, she is struck by the vision that IS Xena.
http://mikes-images.com/eps/sp/pages/sp_mq_459cd.htm
Gabrielle: (She looks HER old friend up and down, with a smile) “Xena... no matter how hard Ares has tried, he has never been able to break us up.”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1802.jpg
Now... what you have to look at is JOXER's face in the background. He says nothing. He DOES nothing, except look from one woman to the other and back again, with his mouth hanging open. I know what Saturn5 thinks is going through Joxer's mind right now... and I agree. Joxer is accessing his memories from Harry's life. You remember Harry right? The guy who lived with and bedded Annie regularly until they broke up and he MARRIED and bedded Mattie regularly. I was quite surprised that Joxer didn't collapse from sensory overload right there!
Xena-in-Annie: “And he never will, I promise.”
Joxer-in-Harry: “Yeah-- because-- ”
Xena-in-Annie: (She puts her arm across Gabrielle's shoulders) “What do you say we call it a day?”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1817.jpg
Gabrielle: “All right.”
Joxer-in-Harry: (He's straightening out his suitcoat as they walk away) “Sounds good.”
Xena-in-Annie: (Now you realize that this IS Xena, seeing Gabrielle for the first time in 2 millenia) “You know, I liked ya better blonde, but I can go with this.”
Gabrielle: (Smiles) “Thanks.” (Can a bottle of Miss Clairol be in her future?)
Joxer-in-Harry: “Hey, anything I gotta know about this new body of mine?”
Xena-in-Annie: (Oh yeahhhhh, THIS is OUR Xena!) “Yeah... don’t stray too far from the bathroom.”
And she walks out of view with Gabrielle at her side, leaving Joxer the scene stealer to wrap up the final ep before the storm hits.
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1823.jpg
Joxer-in-Harry: [Flatus attack commences] “Oh! Dear God! What did you eat?! Oh! Out of the way!”
http://miroirdarc.com/xwp/s6/sp_3/xena_s6_sp_dArc_1829.jpg
I've loved you before:
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