and my Mum won't let me go to Knebworth

[K'Ehleyr]

And what did he learn from this?

I can lie, steal, (smoke,) but if I return safely and apologize to all, they'll be so relieved to see me that they'll give me what I want after all.

Bad strategy. He'll do stuff again because he now knows he can get away with it. I know it's hard with teens (I raised three,) but if any of them had pulled that, they'd be picking out flowers for their own funerals right before I killed them with my bare hands.

He did lie but he did admit to it days before the gig and it was all resolved before he went. He did take the card but returned it as soon as he was challenged about it. I confidently believe he would never have taken the money and gone which is why he fessed up. He has never made a big whopper of a lie before and always tells me where he is, who he's with and how he can be contacted if his phone goes down.

Had he done it the other way and gone without telling me who with then obviously it would have been a different story.

Personally I think I made the right decision for him and I've had regular texts saying what an awesome time he's having and thanks. I'm sure he's realised that this is the way to go about things in the future.

 

[K'Ehleyr]

Well this has taken an interesting twist... Got a text from son a bit earlier this evening saying he'd never been so scared and everybody there is insane and he'd retired to the tent. I replied ~ take a moment, eat, drink and get back out there ~ preferably at the back of the crowd of 60,000 and in sight of your tent.

Well he wanted to do it I know full well he'll be safe, I have scrutinised the site and the organisers.

I am, however, torn between the natural maternal instinct that I need to rescue him because he's scared or thinking this is an excellent opportunity for him to realise that it's a wonderful experience for him (and me *wry grin*) ~ from which, hopefully, he'll learn

 

[Plecostomus]

I wish my mother was as cool as you. She was/is a strict religious fanatic.

 

[K'Ehleyr]

I wish my mother was as cool as you. She was/is a strict religious fanatic.

Yo Plec, But I'm religious ~ I worship Bacchus

 

[An Officer]

He's only little... if he's genuinely scared, he should have an opportunity to come home. There's a lot of hard drug-taking at those sort of do's... I'm sure he's seen some freaky shit. I would rescue him if I were his mum. I'd call someone with a car and go get him. No need to expose him to danger if he feels intimidated. Poor kid. He must be desperate if he's told you he's scared. I wouldn't imagine that's easy for a teenage boy to admit.

 

[K'Ehleyr]

He's only little... if he's genuinely scared, he should have an opportunity to come home. There's a lot of hard drug-taking at those sort of do's... I'm sure he's seen some freaky shit. I would rescue him if I were his mum. I'd call someone with a car and go get him. No need to expose him to danger if he feels intimidated. Poor kid. He must be desperate if he's told you he's scared. I wouldn't imagine that's easy for a teenage boy to admit.

NO, don't do that to me. He followed it up with a 'lol'. Oh shit ~ now I have to phone him...

 

[Plecostomus]

I wish my mother was as cool as you. She was/is a strict religious fanatic.

Yo Plec, But I'm religious ~ I worship Bacchus

Oh I'm still "religious" but I've learned "in all things moderation but not to excess."

Lets just say "sheltered life." I didn't get to see a concert until I was 30. Managed to shake off enough conditioning by then.

If he's really scared he'll txt you again relax and revel in his not-home-ness for a few more hours.

 

[An Officer]

NO, don't do that to me. He followed it up with a 'lol'. Oh shit ~ now I have to phone him...

I don't mean to alarm you. The "lol" is quite encouraging. I'm just posting what I would think and do in that situation. I'd probably at least make the offer to get him, and give him the opportunity to accept, if that's what he wanted. He does sound quite vulnerable and in need of as much support as he can get. Yet, I'm not in charge of a teenager myself, so I probably don't know what it's like, and maybe I shouldn't comment at all.

I hope your mind was eased when you spoke to him on the phone...

 

[Australis]

A new experience can be quite overwhelming, especially one with a LOT of other people. If he takes that step back and a few deep breaths, he should be able to cope.

The question is... will you cope?

I've been through this a few times, as my young 'uns have to drive themselves to concerts in Sydney. So there's traffic, fast cars, police, crazed concert-goers, and so on. Fortunately they're pretty level-headed, and the only things that goes haywire are my nerves.

 

[K'Ehleyr]

NO, don't do that to me. He followed it up with a 'lol'. Oh shit ~ now I have to phone him...

I don't mean to alarm you. The "lol" is quite encouraging. I'm just posting what I would think and do in that situation. I'd probably at least make the offer to get him, and give him the opportunity to accept, if that's what he wanted. He does sound quite vulnerable and in need of as much support as he can get. Yet, I'm not in charge of a teenager myself, so I probably don't know what it's like, and maybe I shouldn't comment at all.

I hope your mind was eased when you spoke to him on the phone...

The "lol" was important. He's fine and having an amazing time. It was peeing with rain, dark and the 'moosching' (sp?!) got a bit too much. They stayed in the tent and went to sleep whilst it was still going on ~ I think they peeked too early on the first day.
He's in high spirits today and at least he knows what to expect later now.

My first reaction was to go and get 'my baby' but he'll never learn if I hold his hand all the time

A new experience can be quite overwhelming, especially one with a LOT of other people. If he takes that step back and a few deep breaths, he should be able to cope.

The question is... will you cope?

I've been through this a few times, as my young 'uns have to drive themselves to concerts in Sydney. So there's traffic, fast cars, police, crazed concert-goers, and so on. Fortunately they're pretty level-headed, and the only things that goes haywire are my nerves.

Yes I think he wanted to send 'exhilarated' rather than 'scared'. It is his first time at anything like this, but there's got to be a first time some time

He's having a ball and I expect a very muddy, dirty but happy man to return tomorrow and me and the wine are coping very well so far

 

[An Officer]

Glad both you and son are happy now.

 

[trekkiedane]

My nephew (17) went to his first music festival earlier this summer... after a few days of that he seriously wanted to come home again -the poor thing has never been roughing it before

After texting with his mum for a few hours he decided to stay though.

(He did however come home for a couple of hours to get a shower and what I can only assume was a pep-talk from his mum)

 

[K'Ehleyr]

Glad both you and son are happy now.

Thanks Officer I'm really glad he's had a great time, he texted an hour ago saying he was shattered and bedded in but it had been great.

My nephew (17) went to his first music festival earlier this summer... after a few days of that he seriously wanted to come home again -the poor thing has never been roughing it before

After texting with his mum for a few hours he decided to stay though.

(He did however come home for a couple of hours to get a shower and what I can only assume was a pep-talk from his mum)

"...what I can only assume was a pep-talk from his mum" That's the thing ~ they want to do it but just don't like the realism.

Yes, son decribed the tent his friend supplied as 'delapitated' ~ not such a VIP Yurt then
Did rib him a bit before he went as he's quite fussy about his hair ~ dryer, straighteners etc and he mentioned that you could get a locker there with an electricity supply for phone chargers etc. Great, I said, you could plug your straighteners in and do your hair as well. For a moment I swear he considered it

Well he's home tomorrow... Am going to make an extra special clean, new, comfy bed for him to crash into after a long hot bath with his special 'snug as a bug' bath bubbles. I don't care if he's 16 ~ he's still my baby.

 

[An Officer]

Ooh, sounds like a great homecoming. I always got three square meals, but it never extended to bubble baths being run or beds being made... he's a lucky boy!

 

[K'Ehleyr]

I wish my mother was as cool as you. She was/is a strict religious fanatic.


Oh I'm still "religious" but I've learned "in all things moderation but not to excess."

Lets just say "sheltered life." I didn't get to see a concert until I was 30. Managed to shake off enough conditioning by then.

If he's really scared he'll txt you again relax and revel in his not-home-ness for a few more hours.

To an extent I have sheltered him ~ if you can call sending him to boarding school at 11 'sheltering' But because I was a single Mum to an only child I was aware I could have become incredibly overprotective. At school he received all the education, direction, motivation and discipline that he needed and I was able to be fun, social, life skills enabler.

He had a wicked 16th party which is still the talk of his 'group', I've encouraged and 'sourced' ways for him to explore his love of Japanese, we've had dinner with Adeline Yen Mah (I know she's Chinese but it's the closest I could get) in London where there was not one adult around the table without an OBE, MBE or other initials ~ showing him that you can do absolutely anything you set your mind to.

He has come back from this weekend, where they pitched their tent in the family area where they thought it would be less manic and got away with it by hiding the security guards beers for him , with new friends names written all over his body to add to facebook who all thought he was so cool ~ which is, as we know, the most important thing to be at 16.

And so much more confidence.

He ran the information tent for 3 hours because the guys had officially clocked off, entitled it 'mis-information desk' and fielded such in-depth questions as 'who got evicted from Big Brother' and 'where are the loos'.

He bargained with a guy flogging a case of beer and got his 'official Sonisphere T-shirt' half price by waiting for the 'sale' price. Was friendly and fun and therefore invited to join BBQs for free food

These are the things that can not be taught, these are the things you have to learn ~ how to be resourceful, how to 'blag' etc. and I am incredibly proud of him that he nailed it, And came back with £10

Ok ~ that's it. I'm going to shut the hell up about it now. Thanks all.

K'eh.
*picking up socks with gloves on and throwing them away already*

Officer, he also got sushi, hot choc cake and the biggest bagel fest in the world. Yep ~ totally spoilt

 

[An Officer]

Sounds like a very like-able young man.

 

[Australis]

Well, I'd say at a guess his mum likes him.

 

[trekkiedane]

So cool K'

 

[trampledamage]

If he starts messing up again - show him this thread and say, "Look! This is what they were recommending I do to you last time!"

 

[Aurian]

Yeah, especially Bonzes tip about picking flowers