"After Earth" - Trailer (M. Night Shyamalan, Will & Jayden Smith)
- Thread starter Flying Spaghetti Monster
- Start date
Well his Dad may not have been in the Karate Kid, but both of his parents produced the movie to be a leading role for their son.
At least Aaron Spelling knew Tori wasn't good enough to be the lead character of 90210.
Well the box office receipts for Karate Kid disprove that. As for After Earth it will likely go down in flames in the US, but it might do well overseas. Where this could all lead for Jaden Smith's career I have no clue.
The Onion piece (I know it's not serious) claims the movie has no soul. It's not the greatest piece of acting in the world but I thought it was heartfelt enough, or at least attempted to be, and it didn't come across as soulless to me. It is a simple story about a father and son connecting and the son coming into his own. It's a story about a son stepping out of from under his father's shadow, the claim many make that the Smiths have actually done by making this film together.
The Onion piece (I know it's not serious) claims the movie has no soul. It's not the greatest piece of acting in the world but I thought it was heartfelt enough, or at least attempted to be, and it didn't come across as soulless to me. It is a simple story about a father and son connecting and the son coming into his own. It's a story about a son stepping out of from under his father's shadow, the claim many make that the Smiths have actually done by making this film together.
25 minutes in, and I am really not feeling it.
After Oblivion, I'm really expecting a twist.
The villains are badly armed, it has to be a ruse.
After Oblivion, I'm really expecting a twist.
The villains are badly armed, it has to be a ruse.
As far as I'm concerned, it's their money and their kid, and they can do whatever they want with it. There's no reason why there can't be family businesses in the film industry. As with normal businesses, the customer, meaning you, decides if the new kid is worth the ticket.
But it's my 2 hours.
This movie has the wrong name.
A more accurate name would have been...
After Man.
Back to Earth.
Return to Earth.
(0r)
Cadet Jayden's Homecoming.
....
The colony world is called Nova Prime?
New One?
What world are you from?
The New One.
No sir.
I don't think I'm giving away any spoilers?
Although I thought of Enterprise when I heard the name of the colony.
Terra Nova in season one and Terra Prime in season four.
A more accurate name would have been...
After Man.
Back to Earth.
Return to Earth.
(0r)
Cadet Jayden's Homecoming.
....
The colony world is called Nova Prime?
New One?
What world are you from?
The New One.
No sir.
I don't think I'm giving away any spoilers?
Although I thought of Enterprise when I heard the name of the colony.
Terra Nova in season one and Terra Prime in season four.
It's like Jurassic park.
You paid to see a movie about monsters eating annoying children, and then... They all hop into a helicopter and fly away exacting no resolutions whatsofuckingever.
I just wanted to see Kirsten Dunst bisected.
Is that too much to ask?
You paid to see a movie about monsters eating annoying children, and then... They all hop into a helicopter and fly away exacting no resolutions whatsofuckingever.
I just wanted to see Kirsten Dunst bisected.
Is that too much to ask?
Third place in the U.S. for it's opening weekend - could this film be bombing any bigger?
Umm, yes, by being in fourth place, fifth place, sixth place...
I'll woo Kirsten into a time machine cleverly at some point.
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000611/?ref_=tt_cl_t8
Ariana Richards. Child star. Escaped. Has a real life. Good for her.
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000611/?ref_=tt_cl_t8
Ariana Richards. Child star. Escaped. Has a real life. Good for her.
I'll probably see it. if I do it's when it's on cable.
I actually do not like theaters so I either rent or buy movies but I will still rent this movie, just might not buy it.
I only go to the cinema a few times a year, most of the time I'll wait to see it by other means. i.e. Blu-ray, TV. The trailer hasn't enticed me to want to spend almost £15 (when I've factored into cost of ticket, drink, diesel to get to the cinema etc..) on going to see on the big screen. My nexxt film I'll be doing that for is "Man of Steel"
What would have made this movie, is that if after Will crashed, that the villain, if the villain could talk and it wasn't a dumb senseless animal, had punched him in the face and said "WELCOME TO EARTH!"
How likely would it have been that the Independence Day lawyer scum would sue?
Seriously.
These things have been hunting humans for a thousand years and no one has figured out how to genetically alter or flavour the sweat glands? or wear bubble suits or hermetically sealed armour? or even the fuck toss in a hand full of stink bombs before you walk right up to the bastard and kill it. Seriously, flood the camp, or the whole damn planet in sulphur.
That's why I assumed there was a twist at the end because this foe is so fucking stupid that man had to have been letting it slaughter it's citizens for the last thousand years and what the fuck is it with all the creatures on Earth being so large? Did man reduce his dimensions to make space travel easier?
That was a sabertooth tiger.
Which had me wondering if this was the past, but it can't be the past if the kids are reading Moby Dick, unless they went through a time... Nope... No explanations. Just a shitty ending where they kill a dog and the ambulance arrives after the boy dials 911.
Shiiiiit.
How likely would it have been that the Independence Day lawyer scum would sue?
Seriously.
These things have been hunting humans for a thousand years and no one has figured out how to genetically alter or flavour the sweat glands? or wear bubble suits or hermetically sealed armour? or even the fuck toss in a hand full of stink bombs before you walk right up to the bastard and kill it. Seriously, flood the camp, or the whole damn planet in sulphur.
That's why I assumed there was a twist at the end because this foe is so fucking stupid that man had to have been letting it slaughter it's citizens for the last thousand years and what the fuck is it with all the creatures on Earth being so large? Did man reduce his dimensions to make space travel easier?
That was a sabertooth tiger.
Which had me wondering if this was the past, but it can't be the past if the kids are reading Moby Dick, unless they went through a time... Nope... No explanations. Just a shitty ending where they kill a dog and the ambulance arrives after the boy dials 911.
Shiiiiit.
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A Scientology expert de-bunks the Scientology propaganda angle-- "After Earth is just a shitty movie, not Scientology proaganda."
And people are going to say "Nice try, Scientologists!"