Abrams' "Revisions" - Things I'm okay with and things I'm not

[T'Aerwynd]

That part in the trailer where the car goes over the cliff and the officer asks his name and he says his full name. It just seemed so tacky to me. I hope I am not alone in that.

I love the idea of James T. Kirk as a freckle-faced, snot-nosed kid who's too big for his britches. The scene would have been a little better, IMO, if the kid had replied to the cop, "James." while crossing his arms and looking like he's got a chip on his shoulder the size of Montana. The officer could have said, "James what?" and the kid could have all but shouted, "James Tiberius Kirk!" in that tone of voice that makes parents everywhere go, "Don't you take that tone with ME, young man." The kid pulled off his line pretty well, I think, but I'd have tweaked it some.

 

[Qonos]

Yeah - they are going to relaunch Star Trek with Captain Kirk groping random women

Spoiler: film spoilers

He chats her up in a bar and gets knocked into her, he doesn't wander up behind her and grab hold of her breasts.

For me the point is more that this is a cheap adolescent attempt at humor. And honestly, if you were knocked into a woman, wouldn't you grab her arms or her shoulders to try to steady yourself? Which kicks the whole thing up another level of dumb.

You'd reach for the part of the body you could get a hold of. Sometimes it's the arm, sometimes it's the chest...

 

[Lapis Exilis]

Yeah - they are going to relaunch Star Trek with Captain Kirk groping random women

Spoiler: film spoilers

He chats her up in a bar and gets knocked into her, he doesn't wander up behind her and grab hold of her breasts.

For me the point is more that this is a cheap adolescent attempt at humor. And honestly, if you were knocked into a woman, wouldn't you grab her arms or her shoulders to try to steady yourself? Which kicks the whole thing up another level of dumb.

You'd reach for the part of the body you could get a hold of. Sometimes it's the arm, sometimes it's the chest...

That's basically saying that you'd grab someone's crotch to steady yourself if it was what you could get a hold of.

The bit sounds like a cheap, crass joke aimed at making twelve year old boys laugh. I just don't see how it can be made to look realistic at all.

 

[Ssosmcin]

You'd reach for the part of the body you could get a hold of. Sometimes it's the arm, sometimes it's the chest...

I will admit, I'm not a wiseass farm boy pissing off cadets. But I have fallen down in front of women and one actually had helped me up. I took the hand she offered. I did not reach for her tits. They would be too far up, and it would be a conscious decision. And, no kidding, if someone's not offering to help you up, you don't start climbing up the person. You look for another handhold within reach, like a chair, ledge or column. Don't tell an old Aberdeen Pub Crawler how to get up off his drunken ass.

I'm not a woman, but I'm married to one. I don't think using her breasts to support my weight while I pull myself up would actually, physically work without:

a) pulling her down with me
b) seriously hurting her fun bags

Now - I have accidentally grabbed a boob or two in my time and it's all a matter of timing: being at the (wrong/right) place at the (wrong/right) time. They could have come up with a more logical reason for Kirk to accidentially grab some mammory without the whole "free climbing el Uhura." He could have been reaching for his beer without looking at where his hand was going. Or gone for a bottle to break as a weapon he knew was there, but misjudged because, again, he wasn't looking.

But, then again, maybe the film will make this seem funny and rational. Won't know until May.

 

[Kirk-Fu]

I'm cool with all of it. Canon changing doesn't bother me in the least. I'll still be able to watch the Trek that's come before.

 

[Qonos]

For me the point is more that this is a cheap adolescent attempt at humor. And honestly, if you were knocked into a woman, wouldn't you grab her arms or her shoulders to try to steady yourself? Which kicks the whole thing up another level of dumb.

You'd reach for the part of the body you could get a hold of. Sometimes it's the arm, sometimes it's the chest...

That's basically saying that you'd grab someone's crotch to steady yourself if it was what you could get a hold of.

The bit sounds like a cheap, crass joke aimed at making twelve year old boys laugh. I just don't see how it can be made to look realistic at all.

Naw usually if your reaching for the crotch it's much too late.

And I work in bars at night and have actually seen it happen... Your point? Of course usually it would be some ones friend and not a complete stranger. I also see it as a silly little thing to get all hung up about. IT'S A MOVIE, if it was an attempt at humor, yeah it will fail, but seeing as in the time I've been a host of Karaoke shows I've actually seen the situation and even though it would be a rare target it's plausable. Me personally would reach for whatever/whoever I could grab on to to keep me from falling, and apologize accordingly later.

 

[Admiral Buzzkill]

Yeah, it's as ridiculous as the choreography of the bar room fight in "The Trouble With Tribbles" - a notoriously disliked episode of TOS.

 

[Lapis Exilis]

You'd reach for the part of the body you could get a hold of. Sometimes it's the arm, sometimes it's the chest...

That's basically saying that you'd grab someone's crotch to steady yourself if it was what you could get a hold of.

The bit sounds like a cheap, crass joke aimed at making twelve year old boys laugh. I just don't see how it can be made to look realistic at all.

Naw usually if your reaching for the crotch it's much too late.

And I work in bars at night and have actually seen it happen... Your point? Of course usually it would be some ones friend and not a complete stranger. I also see it as a silly little thing to get all hung up about. IT'S A MOVIE, if it was an attempt at humor, yeah it will fail, but seeing as in the time I've been a host of Karaoke shows I've actually seen the situation and even though it would be a rare target it's plausable. Me personally would reach for whatever/whoever I could grab on to to keep me from falling, and apologize accordingly later.

Yes, it is a movie - and you could merely shrug at the fact that I think it sounds like an adolescent joke. Must everyone be of the opinion that all the humor in the movie is sophisticated and high brow?

 

[Qonos]

That's basically saying that you'd grab someone's crotch to steady yourself if it was what you could get a hold of.

The bit sounds like a cheap, crass joke aimed at making twelve year old boys laugh. I just don't see how it can be made to look realistic at all.

Naw usually if your reaching for the crotch it's much too late.

And I work in bars at night and have actually seen it happen... Your point? Of course usually it would be some ones friend and not a complete stranger. I also see it as a silly little thing to get all hung up about. IT'S A MOVIE, if it was an attempt at humor, yeah it will fail, but seeing as in the time I've been a host of Karaoke shows I've actually seen the situation and even though it would be a rare target it's plausable. Me personally would reach for whatever/whoever I could grab on to to keep me from falling, and apologize accordingly later.

Yes, it is a movie - and you could merely shrug at the fact that I think it sounds like an adolescent joke. Must everyone be of the opinion that all the humor in the movie is sophisticated and high brow?

No, but why must everyone expect all humor in movies to be sophisticated and High Brow when it's proven time and again that low brow humor has always been more successful.

Benny Hill,
The Three Stooges.
Carlos Mencia
Dave Chapelle

None of these men are High Brow or Sophisticated when it comes to humor, but they made money... and lots of it. There is room for all types of humor in this movie and well I expect to see some clever high brow stuff and some low brow stuff. Like the lubrication scene in Transformers, which I did get a kick out of.

 

[Richard Baker]

IIRC Shatner's humorous contribution to ST-5- The Final Frontier was a Pool Table which was an actual pool. He loves puns.

Star Trek has all sorts of niched humor if you look for it.

.

 

[Eric Cheung]

Benny Hill,
The Three Stooges.
Carlos Mencia
Dave Chapelle

None of these men are High Brow or Sophisticated when it comes to humor, but they made money... and lots of it. There is room for all types of humor in this movie and well I expect to see some clever high brow stuff and some low brow stuff. Like the lubrication scene in Transformers, which I did get a kick out of.

I agree with all of your choices except Dave Chappelle. His comedy was extremely smart and sophisticated. It just happened to feature crassness and vulgarity. Those were just tools of his. He used themes such as race-relations and wish-fulfillment as social commentary and satire.

Carlos Mencia works in the opposite direction by shoehorning free-speech activism as justification for his hate-speech and obnoxiousness.

What little I've seen of Benny Hill hasn't impressed me because it's not even as thought out as that.

As for the Three Stooges, there are far better comics from the late silent-era to the pre-TV era such as Buster Keaton, Harold Lloyd, Hal Langdon, Laurel and Hardy, The Marx Brothers, even cartoons like Felix the Cat work much better as surreal visual humor.

 

[Lapis Exilis]

Naw usually if your reaching for the crotch it's much too late.

And I work in bars at night and have actually seen it happen... Your point? Of course usually it would be some ones friend and not a complete stranger. I also see it as a silly little thing to get all hung up about. IT'S A MOVIE, if it was an attempt at humor, yeah it will fail, but seeing as in the time I've been a host of Karaoke shows I've actually seen the situation and even though it would be a rare target it's plausable. Me personally would reach for whatever/whoever I could grab on to to keep me from falling, and apologize accordingly later.

Yes, it is a movie - and you could merely shrug at the fact that I think it sounds like an adolescent joke. Must everyone be of the opinion that all the humor in the movie is sophisticated and high brow?

No, but why must everyone expect all humor in movies to be sophisticated and High Brow

I never said I did expect it. I simply said I thought the bit sounded like a cheap, adolescent attempt at humor and a few people got all defensive.

when it's proven time and again that low brow humor has always been more successful.

Oh absolutely, because what I'm hoping for is that this film will go for the lowest common denominator of what's "successful".

 

[Dan_Crout]

The bit sounds like a cheap, crass joke aimed at making twelve year old boys laugh. I just don't see how it can be made to look realistic at all.

In the bar fight scrum, Kirk and Uhura (and probably some other cadets/bar patrons) end up in a pile on the floor or against a wall/table/bar. Without realizing is, the scrum's forced them together. Kirk's accidentally ended up with his hand on Uhura's boobie. Both realize it at the same moment, awkward beat, Kirk moves to apologize, Uhura decks him. Humorous, plausible, realistic.

Dan

 

[Eric Cheung]

I think the degree to which that bit of the bar scene is funny depends on how staged it was, and the reaction of those involved. If it was sort of this mistake that happened in filming and JJ decided to keep it then it might be a cute little embarrassing moment. If it's written that way then I don't know, it seems a little gratuitous. Of course that's something we might never know, so we have to rely on actually seeing it and judging for ourselves if it plays as real. More likely than not though it's the latter and probably should have been cut at the script stage.