A Question To The "Involved" Men Of The Board...

[Captain_Nick]

If your very serious girlfriend was casually chatting with a few male friends online every now and then(one of them being almost ten years younger than her, and in a very serious relationship themselves)would you feel threatened by it? Would you accuse her of being unfaithful? Would you basically come out and call her a whore? Would you be willing to lose this person whom you claim to love more than life itself over this situation? Would you get angry and constantly throw in her face that you yourself don't talk to anyone online but said person? Tell me, please, am I really in the wrong here? Because I sit here feeling like absolute shit, feeling utterly useless, feeling that I honestly did something wrong, seconds away from losing the love of my life, and I do not know what to do.

Your post reeks of insecurity.

I thought you should know.

 

[GemHaters]

If your very serious girlfriend was casually chatting with a few male friends online every now and then(one of them being almost ten years younger than her, and in a very serious relationship themselves)would you feel threatened by it? Would you accuse her of being unfaithful? Would you basically come out and call her a whore? Would you be willing to lose this person whom you claim to love more than life itself over this situation? Would you get angry and constantly throw in her face that you yourself don't talk to anyone online but said person? Tell me, please, am I really in the wrong here? Because I sit here feeling like absolute shit, feeling utterly useless, feeling that I honestly did something wrong, seconds away from losing the love of my life, and I do not know what to do.

Your post reeks of insecurity.

I thought you should know.

Do I know you...?

Ugh, either way. Insecurity, huh? Ya think?

 

[Captain_Nick]

I do. I felt compelled to make sure you knew too.

 

[GemHaters]

I do. I felt compelled to make sure you knew too.

Seriously, do I know you? You seem familiar to me.

 

[Sean Aaron]

f you're going to get a "them or me" ultimatum, then you should probably decide what is more important in your life and move on. Your relationship sounds unhealthy from what you've already written: he's clearly insecure and expressing that by being controlling and snogging other people.

Obviously we cannot answer whether or not you feel like you can communicate with him or if you want to try, but despite being a cliche a good relationship has to be built upon trust. If you cannot trust each other then maybe you shouldn't be together.

Oops, missed the post where you've decided to write-off the relationship. Apologies for the late advice.

 

[Captain_Nick]

I do. I felt compelled to make sure you knew too.

Seriously, do I know you? You seem familiar to me.

I don't think so. I post here from time to time then disappear for months or years on end.

 

[GemHaters]

I do. I felt compelled to make sure you knew too.

Seriously, do I know you? You seem familiar to me.

I don't think so. I post here from time to time then disappear for months or years on end.

Oh thank God. Honestly, I thought you were my bf for a second. *phew*

 

[Captain_Nick]

Oh, noo no. Although I can see why you would think that. I can be blunt.

 

[GemHaters]

Oh, noo no. Although I can see why you would think that. I can be blunt.

No, it's your username.

 

[Captain_Nick]

Fascinating

 

[Captain_Nick]

Maybe I have been sleep posting again

 

[GemHaters]

Fascinating

You're Australian, yes?

 

[Captain_Nick]

Yes....

 

[TheBrew]

Remember to see if the next guy likes Chevelle before dating him.

 

[Lonemagpie]

If your very serious girlfriend was casually chatting with a few male friends online every now and then(one of them being almost ten years younger than her, and in a very serious relationship themselves)would you feel threatened by it? Would you accuse her of being unfaithful? Would you basically come out and call her a whore? Would you be willing to lose this person whom you claim to love more than life itself over this situation? Would you get angry and constantly throw in her face that you yourself don't talk to anyone online but said person?

No, I wouldn't, don't, and never have.

 

[SPOCKED]

Because I sit here feeling like absolute shit, feeling utterly useless, feeling that I honestly did something wrong, seconds away from losing the love of my life, and I do not know what to do.

This love of your life sounds defective. It may take a few more loves of your life before the one and only true love of your life emerges

 

[ares93]

If your very serious girlfriend was casually chatting with a few male friends online every now and then(one of them being almost ten years younger than her, and in a very serious relationship themselves)would you feel threatened by it?

It doesn't bother me at all. So just because you and this bloke are together you have to cut every male friend out of your life? Nah, this is bollocks. For the record, I wouldn't out up with this kind of controlling behaviour for a second.

Would you accuse her of being unfaithful? Would you basically come out and call her a whore? Would you be willing to lose this person whom you claim to love more than life itself over this situation? Would you get angry and constantly throw in her face that you yourself don't talk to anyone online but said person?

Luv', if I said those things to my girlfriend, her father would put a bullet in my knee cap. (No, I'm not kidding. I honestly believe he capable of it.) But for the sake of this discussion, if my gf's father didn't scare the living daylights out of me, I'd still wouldn't say those things. A relationship is built on trust and respect, without those two things, you might as well high tail it outta Dodge this moment. From what you've posted now and in the past, I'd say you should cut your losses.

And if he claims he doesn't talk to anyone else online, he's full of it. Ask him when was the last time he used Facebook.

Tell me, please, am I really in the wrong here? Because I sit here feeling like absolute shit, feeling utterly useless, feeling that I honestly did something wrong, seconds away from losing the love of my life, and I do not know what to do.

You are NOT in the wrong here, luv'. And quite frankly, this bloke sounds like a right bastard. And as someone mentioned before, this is the kind of behaviour that escalates into abuse.

Now I'm not saying that this bloke will do the same thing. But the last time I saw a situation like this, and i foolishly let it escalate, it ended with one of my best friends in the hospital with a broken jaw, tree broken ribs, a punctured lung and various cuts and bruises. But thats a whole 'nother story.

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

Luv', if I said those things to my girlfriend, her father would put a bullet in my knee cap.

Don't you mean an arrow? Luv'?

 

[ares93]

Luv', if I said those things to my girlfriend, her father would put a bullet in my knee cap.

Don't you mean an arrow? Luv'?

I hate that game. And no, not an arrow. He carries an M/88. (That would be a Glock 17 for anyone unfamiliar with SAF designations) And he's bloody skilled with it too.

BTW, Luv' or Love is a slang term when your refer to a woman you don't know. The male equivalent would be "mate". Just a silly term I picked up from my girlfriend's grandfather.

 

[Emher]

Seems you've come to the right decision. Trust me, he may seem like "the one" and the last chance and so forth... But trust me, that's just not true. For the longest time I was utterly heartbroken after it ended between my and ex and I. Now I honestly can not imagine what possessed me to propose to that [PASSAGE CENSORED] psycho bitch?

In short, move on. Shit gets a lot better.