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2011 NFL Season - A New Game

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If Lane Kiffin were coaching the Bears, I would absolutely expect him to troll the league like that.
 
A few of the hopes and questions for the 2011 season...

Tim Tebow finally shuts the fuck up. Okay, asking too much. How about just taking away his megaphone and shipping him off somewhere remote where he can tell the locals that they should be 100% free to worship exactly as he sees fit.

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Someone will finally explain to me why Phillip Rivers is considered one of ELITE QBs of today, but Tony Romo has the reputation of a an overhyped loser.

Rivers career: QBrate: 97.2, RegSeason: 56-29 Playoffs: 3-4
Romo career: QBrate: 95.2, RegSeason: 38-17 Playoffs: 1-3

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Why do they let Adam Rank continue to write articles on NFL.com?

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Why do the let Adam Schefter continue his swarthy little existence?

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Am I the only NFL fan who actually LIKES Joe Buck and thinks Troy Aikman is a blathering buffoon?

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Will people stop telling me, "Get over it, he served his time" about Michael Vick? Do they not realize I was fully aware of his scummy, pathetic entitlement personality before we ever heard of the dog scandal? Aren't I still allowed to hate him?

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Will the people who think "It ain't football unless you're allowed to do long-term, degenerative brain damage on your opponents and yourself" shut the fuck up and go watch fucking NASCAR or else realize that something can be theatrical and exciting without destroying other people's minds and bodies? Are you really still that bloodthirsty? Do you have to see pain in others to enjoy something? Really, can you not evolve with the rest of us?

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What do you want to bet that what Shapiro is saying about the former Miami players turns out to be 98.3% total fucking.... TRUTH!
 
Am I the only NFL fan who actually LIKES Joe Buck and thinks Troy Aikman is a blathering buffoon?

I agree with half of this.

Will people stop telling me, "Get over it, he served his time" about Michael Vick? Do they not realize I was fully aware of his scummy, pathetic entitlement personality before we ever heard of the dog scandal? Aren't I still allowed to hate him?

You're free to hate him all you want. The "he served his time" argument usually relates to whether he should be playing in the NFL at all.
 
Well, if we didn't allow criminals to play in the NFL... you can figure out the rest :)

And why do you hate Joe Buck? I swear, I'm the only person I've ever met who actually likes him in the booth.
 
Joe Buck is fundamentally incapable of shutting the fuck up, and instead of actually calling the action on the field, he feels compelled to inject his own personal commentary into every single fucking thing that happens ever, even if it's something as pointless as a waterboy filling cups.

Much like Thom Brennaman, he's a classic example of a guy who has a job simply because of who his sperm donor was.
 
Well you don't sound like you can't stand him, it just sounds like he doesn't excite you. I can buy that. I meet so many people who just can't tolerate him.

And he's not a hooper and hollerer (I'm sure there must be a better way to spell those), but I'm fine w/that.

Summeral wasn't either and he's beloved.
 
Joe Buck is fundamentally incapable of shutting the fuck up, and instead of actually calling the action on the field, he feels compelled to inject his own personal commentary into every single fucking thing that happens ever, even if it's something as pointless as a waterboy filling cups.

Much like Thom Brennaman, he's a classic example of a guy who has a job simply because of who his sperm donor was.

Yeah, you just described John Fucking Madden who everyone wants to blow.
 
No, I'm pretty sure that the vast majority of football fans grew to hate John Madden after 1998 or so.

Summeral wasn't either and he's beloved.

Even in his later years, Pat Summerall actually focused on calling the on-field action, and letting Madden tell the story. Buck tries to be play-by-play, color and judge all in one, and it's fucking awful.
 
No, I'm pretty sure that the vast majority of football fans grew to hate John Madden after 1998 or so.

Summeral wasn't either and he's beloved.

Even in his later years, Pat Summerall actually focused on calling the on-field action, and letting Madden tell the story. Buck tries to be play-by-play, color and judge all in one, and it's fucking awful.

Perhaps he realizes he has a peawit for a partner. The man brought my team three Superbowl wins, and I think he'd lose a brain-wrestling contest with Dexter Manley.
 
Right. There's a reason Madden and his telestrator pen became a laughingstock several years ago.
 
Well, now that he's been signed, I'm hoping that Gus Johnson suddenly bursts into the booth during the first minute of FOX's A-game of Week 1, slits the throat of Buck, and assumes his rightful place.
 
Heading to the Ravens/Chiefs game tonight. Hoping Flacco doesn't get actually murdered dead behind the patch-work O-line...
 
Someone will finally explain to me why Phillip Rivers is considered one of ELITE QBs of today, but Tony Romo has the reputation of a an overhyped loser.

Rivers career: QBrate: 97.2, RegSeason: 56-29 Playoffs: 3-4
Romo career: QBrate: 95.2, RegSeason: 38-17 Playoffs: 1-3

He'll never live down dropping the field goal snap in a playoff game. Plus I've never found him particularly effective in crunch time.

Will the people who think "It ain't football unless you're allowed to do long-term, degenerative brain damage on your opponents and yourself" shut the fuck up and go watch fucking NASCAR or else realize that something can be theatrical and exciting without destroying other people's minds and bodies? Are you really still that bloodthirsty? Do you have to see pain in others to enjoy something? Really, can you not evolve with the rest of us?

That is football though. The whole point of the game is for one man to stop another man from advancing the ball and separating it from him in the progress if possible. It has been and always will be a violent game.

How much of the violence can you take out of the game and it still be that at its' core? The kid from Tampa will probably get fined for the hit on the Patriots Ochocinco. A perfectly clean hit where he led with the shoulder and separated the ball from the receiver, yet he got penalized on the field as well. Are we going to say you can't hit the receivers in the process of a catch? Not leading with your head should be common sense for most and I'm glad that they took that on.

But what I mentioned above is still an incredibly violent exchange. Many exchanges are going to be violent when the point of the game is for one man to bring another man to the ground against his will.
 
No, I'm pretty sure that the vast majority of football fans grew to hate John Madden after 1998 or so.

I've hated him since 1976 or so when he was coaching the Raiders. Maybe I was ahead of the curve.

In other news, Brady Quinn will be the Broncos' second QB tonight. Picking between Tebow and Quinn for your backup is like choosing between a turd and a booger. And Orton's not much better.

Thanks Josh McDouchebag. You left the team in great shape.
 
Larry Fitzgerald has signed for 8 years, $120 million, with roughly $50 million guaranteed.

Um, holy shit. I think we just guaranteed that Megatron will get at least $150 million.
 
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