VOY Caption This 97; Sense and Sensibility

[Ln X]

The weekend starts here with the latest caption contest!!! In preparation for the 100th VOY caption contest I'm planning something a bit different from the usual format; this caption (100th one) is going to be based around a small story (for example it could be about Janeway's coffee run) using pictures and captions based around the theme of this story.

And now let us reveal the winners!

The dress? Oh, this is just how Mark liked me to dress up.

Neelix: There, there my sweet Kes. We'll get you back into corporeal form before you know it.

My mind to your mind
Your loins to my loins.
What?
My thoughts....

I'm sorry that I don't have diamonds, my dear Seven, but here are a couple of Kim's gallstones that should make very unique earrings.

Captain's log supplemental - never ask the computer to analyze how many potential dates Harry has lost through social awkwardness!

Paris: "This will make everything go away. Save some for me, I don't want to remember our lizard babies."

TUVOK: Lock and load!

SEVEN: What?

TUVOK: I heard that in a movie once.

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And now the special award:

Janeway: I am the Goddess Janeway. Bask in my unholy light.

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I picked these pictures whilst high on Pink Floyd's Echoes, but anyway the theme this week is sense and sensibility (or lack of). Also up for grabs is a 'on theme' award.

Next caption contest is on the 11th of January!

Enjoy!

 

[Ln X]

Chakotay: What you are doing is madness captain!
Janeway: And I thought you were a man of faith...

Chakotay: So did you remember when...
Kellin: You were firing blanks?
Chakotay: Yeah...

Doctor: Now B'Elanna, I ask you to keep your big nasty Klingon temper on ice or please kindly leave this dwelling of happiness and love and-
B'Elanna: I think I'm going to puke...

<B'Elanna thinking> Did he put it in or not?

Paris: It's not what you think captain, I only said this alien man's erm... thingie... was this big!
Kim: He then started making erm... advances and...
Paris: And we're not into that sort of thing but...
Kim: We shouldn't have gone to that orgy in the first place...

 

[JirinPanthosa]

Rick Berman demanded a virgin sacrifice, to appease the network Gods.

KELLIN: I'll be honest. I only made love with you because I thought you were an android.
CHAKOTAY: I get that all the time.

DOCTOR: Do you like it B'elana? This scene is based on a 20th century horror film Tom Paris recommended to me. Just look at my lovely children.
B'ELANA: A horror film huh. Have you been past the first scene?
DOCTOR: No.
B'ELANA: Do you know what a horror film is?
DOCTOR: No.
B'ELANA: Hrm. Well, enjoy.

B'elana thought she was marrying a badboy, but he turned out to be just a giant dork.

PARIS: So I replicated a Risan horgon, and showed it to Seven, and she took it completely the wrong way.

 

[Finn]

B'Elanna: Why do I smell lube on this pillow?

Tom: (OS) Sorry, I was working on the Camaro in the holodeck before coming home last night.

 

[Nerys Myk]

PARIS: Yeah, we were jumped a couple of Nausicaans...

JANEWAY: I heard it was a couple of Brownies.

HARRY: They were Girl Scouts!!!!!

PARIS (whispering): Shut up Harry.

 

[Triskelion]

TFTW Ln x!

Chakotay: I've been urging you for years to join me in spiritual communion. One weekend with some aliens, suddenly you're into tribal tattoos and shaman trances. The hell?

Janeway: This is not about you. It's about me.

Chakotay: Quelle surprise.

Kellin: I'm on a Talaxian diet.
Chakotay: You only eat Leola root?
Kellin: I only eat Talaxians.
Chakotay: You're a week too late.

B'Elanna: This table looks just like the one in my holoprogram "Bondage Babes of Boreth." The monks strap you down and film you from underneath.

Wife: I know.

Kes: What did you say it was called?

I hope father was wrong. There must be a man out there who can stand my Feklar's morning breath!

We were hoping you'd promote one of us to First Officer. Look how wooden we can be!

 

[Finn]

B'Elanna: And Belle, what about you? What do you want to be when you grow up?

Belle: I'm going to become the most famous Starfleet doctor like Daddy. I'll sing to all of my patients and travel to the stars, and save the ship like Daddy has done many times. He is the Wesley Crusher of Starfleet medicine

B'Elanna: Kes?

Kes: Yes?

B'Elanna: Please shoot me

 

[R. Star]

Thanks for the win!

Janeway: Do I know you?
Chakotay: I'm Chakotay.... you know... your first officer... I've been sitting next to you and standing in your shadow for seven years...
Janeway: No.. sorry. Doesn't ring a bell.

Chakotay: You said I'm the love of my life, but everyone who meets you forgets you and you abandoned everything and everyone you know to return to me?
Kellin: That's right
Paris(off-screen): Some life.. bet you wish -you- could forget it.

EMH: What do you think of my family?
Torres: Your wife sets women's rights back 400 years, your son is going to grow up used to the feeling of daily wedgies and your daughter just makes me want to hurl.

Torres: I just had a dream my boyfriend turned into a lizard and had kinky lizard sex with the captain!

Janeway: Gentlemen, these ratings are unacceptable. What do you intend to do about them?
Kim: Well uh...
Paris: Dammit captain, I can't carry this show by myself. Sure I'm an ace pilot, field medic, commando, I can build ships out of scrap parts and the women love me, but you have to get me a better sidekick. He's killing me.

 

[Triskelion]

Paris: It happened like this, Captain. First they called human women ballbusters. Then they called you all space-skanks. And then...

Janeway: Well, what?

Paris: Then they said you all wear combat boots.

Janeway: And then?

Kim: And then B'Elanna put her combat boot up their asses.

 

[Finn]

Paris:...then Harry tried to take one of my pips...

 

[LeadHead]

Janeway: Okay, somebody else do this. I admit it, I need to go back to the gym.

Chakotay: Did either of us pay at the cashier? ...... MOVE IT!

B'Elanna: Maybe next time I tell a date that "I'm going to slip into something more comfortable," I shouldn't do such a mis-lead.

Paris: Captain, we really didn't know that those Phasers were charged...

 

[Triskelion]

Another one, Captain?

I might have to give up on massage school.

 

[Nerys Myk]

CHAKOTAY: Is that Miss Piggy?

JANEWAY: No Leola root tonight, my friend!!!

 

[Antni]

Chakotay: you ready Kathryn? We're already late.
Janeway: yeah just this last body to cremate then I'm all yours.

Kellin: psst chakotay are you going to eat that pudding?

Torres: ....and then I broke his jaw, haha
Family: *sits in silence for a moment*
Wife: err that's nice.
EMH: awkward more like.

Torres: thank god that was only a dream.
EMH: doctor to lt Torres, the wife feels it's best you never come for dinner again.

Paris: so I put my hands around her like this and she lashed out at us captain.
Janeway: that's not he full story mr Paris she was really a he and he was the king of these people.
Kim: err
Paris: well could've fooled me.

 

[Triskelion]

Chakotay: What's wrong with Kes?
Janeway: Neelix's morning breath.
Chakotay: How do you know?
Janeway: What?

 

[LeadHead]

Chakotay: Kathryn, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!

Janeway: Silence, Chakotay! I'll get rid of the body and we'll just tell the crew she evolved into a greater being!

Kellin: So, you could take me to any restaurant in reality or fiction, via the holodeck, and you bring me to the Mess Hall and Neelix's cooking. You really don't want to get lucky, do you?

B'Elanna: And so then, I reprogrammed your father to not speak at the dinner table ever again.

Wife and Children: THANK YOU!

B'Elanna: Okay who did I go home with last night? Oh, no! I smell Leola Root!

 

[Schistocerca]

Janeway: Ensign Wildman...Samantha... what is it?
Wildman: Warn..the...crew... don't ..eat the..chicken
Janeway: What the hell is that smell...OH MY GOD.

Kellin: I thought chicken curry was on the menu today?
Chakotay: apparently there was an issue with food poisoning and explosive diarrhoea...poor Samantha. Still we managed to destroy it all...well apart from one pot we can't account for

Doctor: So I was going to make something from scratch but when I went down to the mess hall there was no one around so I managed to sneak a pot of chicken curry
B'Elanna: Your so bad...but this is delicious!

<B'Elanna thinking> Oh oh!!!

Paris: She was this close to making it to the John then bam...all up the wall and down the back of both legs!

 

[Ln X]

A new contest can be found here in the link below!

http://www.trekbbs.com/showthread.php?p=7522255#post7522255