Good Husband or Emasculated Wuss?

[Tiberius Jim]

BECAUSE IT IS FULL OF SHIT.

Like a lot people's purses/backpacks/bags.

Still, assuming he's holding it for her due to it's weight is just that...an assumption. I brought this up to my wife and she agreed that the solution for her would to be to not put so much stuff in her purse. I would hold it for her if it were too heavy, but after that one time I'd say we should go over her purse-packing priorities. .

So if she inconvenienced you more than once you'd want a say in what she was lugging?

That's not what I said. I meant that I would be concerned as to why her bag is too heavy for her. She's not always going to have me there to hold it for her, so we should see what we could eliminate to make it easier for her in the future.

Seriously, the level of words being put into mouths here is obscene.

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

I said many men, as in "I could go take a poll of straight guys and ask them if they think pink is a feminine color and I'd put money on it that they would think that it is."

Does that make it feminine because some straight guys say so? If a bunch of straight guys got together and called a gay man a "fag", or a "queer", would they be correct in doing so? I don't think you'd say yes, so why is it okay to poll the consensus of like minded guys who seem concerned about other people's masculinity?

To me, what makes it feminine is the same thing that makes us see red as "stop" or "danger" and green as "go". If you have a baby girl, you get pink balloons, if it's a boy, you get blue. Pink, feminine, blue, masculine. I'm not making this stuff up myself, it's just the way the certain colors are typically perceived.

Yes society has assigned gender associations to the colors pink and blue. (Thank god the other colors are free of this).

If you had said, "my friend had a baby boy and they got tons of pink balloons, what's that about?" I wouldn't have had a problem with that. I would have found it quite understandable that you noticed this and that you wondered why.

But you are asking why a man is taking a freaking PHOTO with PINK PHONE!!

To me this reads like you have some weird issues.

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

Still, assuming he's holding it for her due to it's weight is just that...an assumption. I brought this up to my wife and she agreed that the solution for her would to be to not put so much stuff in her purse. I would hold it for her if it were too heavy, but after that one time I'd say we should go over her purse-packing priorities. .

So if she inconvenienced you more than once you'd want a say in what she was lugging?

That's not what I said. I meant that I would be concerned as to why her bag is too heavy for her. She's not always going to have me there to hold it for her, so we should see what we could eliminate to make it easier for her in the future.

Seriously, the level of words being put into mouths here is obscene.

No one looks through my bag and eliminates stuff. That's just an invasion of personal space.

Mind you I try and extend this to others. If I'm hauling someone's crap I don't question them on why they want that crap. People vary.

 

[SeerSGB]

~scratches head~ Soooo...what was so "OMG!" that FC's friend thought it was so funny to post online? Dude's holding a purse and using his wife's phone to take a pic...and? Ooooh, we're suppose to infer something about the nature of his manhood--or lacking in--from the pic. Yeah, the funny not so much with the seeing it.

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

Pink shrinks your balls. Get the word out.

 

[Tiberius Jim]

No one looks through my bag and eliminates stuff. That's just an invasion of personal space.

Mind you I try and extend this to others. If I'm hauling someone's crap I don't question them on why they want that crap. People vary.

I'm not just some random person, I'm her husband. And I wouldn't be going through her bag without her, throwing things out. We would go through it together and get her bag organized so that it doesn't weigh too much for her. It's called problem solving.

Does that make it feminine because some straight guys say so? If a bunch of straight guys got together and called a gay man a "fag", or a "queer", would they be correct in doing so? I don't think you'd say yes, so why is it okay to poll the consensus of like minded guys who seem concerned about other people's masculinity?

To me, what makes it feminine is the same thing that makes us see red as "stop" or "danger" and green as "go". If you have a baby girl, you get pink balloons, if it's a boy, you get blue. Pink, feminine, blue, masculine. I'm not making this stuff up myself, it's just the way the certain colors are typically perceived.

Yes society has assigned gender associations to the colors pink and blue. (Thank god the other colors are free of this).

If you had said, "my friend had a baby boy and they got tons of pink balloons, what's that about?" I wouldn't have had a problem with that. I would have found it quite understandable that you noticed this and that you wondered why.

But you are asking why a man is taking a freaking PHOTO with PINK PHONE!!

To me this reads like you have some weird issues.

I was primarily playing Devil's Advocate here passing on my friend's view on the topic. The question as to why a pink phone seems feminine was posed and I gave my opinion. Never was I "freaking out" over it. I was simply posing the question.

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

The Devil's always had shit PR.

 

[JoeZhang]

He seems very manly to me - he's not concerned about what other men will think - that by definition would make make him more manly (sorry FC) than Flux Capacitor who seems absolutely worried to death about what makes up being a man and the views of other men.

 

[Kestra]

I wish more people cared less about things like this. It's great to have a partner in life where you can rely on each other, even for trivial things like purse-holding. He probably didn't give it a second thought which would be awesome.

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

I don't get why it would even register with someone. This is not some radical gender bending act.

 

[SeerSGB]

I wish more people cared less about things like this. It's great to have a partner in life where you can rely on each other, even for trivial things like purse-holding. He probably didn't give it a second thought which would be awesome.

It's like I say: once you've been through a couple of child birth's together, there isn't really a whole lot ya' get to be squeamish about with each other

I don't get why it would even register with someone. This is not some radical gender bending act.

Kinda of says more about the person that not only notices but has to stop what they're doing, take a pic, then put it online than it does the man holding the purse.

 

[Tiberius Jim]

He seems very manly to me - he's not concerned about what other men will think - that by definition would make make him more manly (sorry FC) than Flux Capacitor who seems absolutely worried to death about what makes up being a man and the views of other men.

How again has this become about me? I was just posing the damn question...

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

Koi or coy?

 

[Kestra]

He seems very manly to me - he's not concerned about what other men will think - that by definition would make make him more manly (sorry FC) than Flux Capacitor who seems absolutely worried to death about what makes up being a man and the views of other men.

How again has this become about me? I was just posing the damn question...

Well I only saw the thread after you had posted several times, but I did develop a certain impression because your comments were striking. You found this interesting or questionable enough to bring it here and post a thread about it. You seem to think that a guy holding a purse is somehow being subservient, and you have cited things about yourself and your wife while discussing points.

Which really is fine, and you think the way that you think. If nothing else, it seems that you and your wife are on the same page and I think that's really more important than anything else being discussed here. But you do come off as seeing the guy as inferior in some way, which isn't great. If I've read that incorrectly then I do apologize.

 

[Tiberius Jim]

Like I said, I was playing Devil's Advocate so when I described the guy as being subservient that was more of a projection of the photo taker's view than my own. Sorry if I didn't make that more clear. I posted her because there was an interesting debate going on in the photo post (some of her friends saying similar things as are being said here, others agreeing with her) and was curious as to how such a debate might play out with a wider group of people.

 

[Deckerd]

OH will carry my bag if necessary. Mind you he does treat it like radioactive waste.

 

[Kestra]

Like I said, I was playing Devil's Advocate so when I described the guy as being subservient that was more of a projection of the photo taker's view than my own. Sorry if I didn't make that more clear. I posted her because there was an interesting debate going on in the photo post (some of her friends saying similar things as are being said here, others agreeing with her) and was curious as to how such a debate might play out with a wider group of people.

Well why don't you tell us what you think? That might make discussion easier.

 

[trekkiedane]

No one looks through my bag and eliminates stuff. That's just an invasion of personal space.

Whenever a woman asks me to get her something from her handbag -'it's just over there where you're standing', oftentimes being the reason, I'll get her the entire bag -even if I'll have to haul it back again afterwards. There's just no way I'd ever consider even looking into the bag -I would feel like invading her personal space.








Plus: I'm horrified of what I might find in there

 

[MacLeod]

How do we know it's not the wifes phone?

He might not have a mobile.
If he has a mobile, it might not have a camera.
His Mobile could be out of power.
He could have left his mobile in the car.

And so on.

So what we appear to have in the absence of other information appears to be a good husband.

 

[Roger Wilco]

Plus: I'm horrified of what I might find in there

Double plus: you won't find whatever it is you're supposed to be looking for anyway.