High Heels Are, Quite Literally, For Morons

[Amaris]

And yet another BBS thread devolves into horrible puns. I swear, I'll boot the next person who makes one!

They're like a bunch of cantankerous old mules. To be fair, though, at the end of the day, we're all just a bunch of loafers with interesting zories.

Also, everyone look:

A properly fitted show is like a godsend on one's feet. I only have one pair of actual fitted shoes, and they're just terrific.

I made a spelling error by miskey. Take note, it rarely happens. Frame it, love it, show it to your friends.

 

[Tora Ziyal]

And yet another BBS thread devolves into horrible puns. I swear, I'll boot the next person who makes one!

They're like a bunch of cantankerous old mules. To be fair, though, at the end of the day, we're all just a bunch of loafers with interesting zories.

You're really on the ball... keeping us on our toes...

 

[thestrangequark]

The puns are corny, but I suppose they're at least moving us away from the callous tone of some of the earlier posts in this thread.

 

[Tora Ziyal]

Between the photos of cool shoes -- in total contradiction of the OP's intent for this thread -- and the puns, this is a shoe-in for the most fun thread of the month.

 

[Nerys Myk]

[yt]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fKhiPgCKiN8[/yt]

 

[scotpens]

^^ Ah, classic ZZ Top. I’m still in love with that strutting blonde in the red shirt.

As Irving Berlin wrote, there’s no business like shoe business!

The tone of this thread is becoming rather arch, wouldn’t you say?

 

[Data Holmes]

As Irving Berlin wrote, there’s no business like shoe business!

The tone of this thread is becoming rather arch, wouldn’t you say?

I don't know, I think it's starting to fall a little flats myself.

 

[FPAlpha]

^Yeah, it's the straps that look like they hurt like a bitch more than anything else.

High Heels are one of the most effective ways to amp up the sex of a woman.

If she knows how to walk in them it's a sure head turner.. i've seen women with fantastic bodies in normal streetwear and they do look fine but slap some heels on them and it's an entirely different thing.

I know they are hugely damaging to the body and i'd never demand a woman wear them for me but they do make a woman near irresistible.

I think the damage heels do is somewhat overstated, and caused more often by misuse than anything else. Those women with horribly twisted feet and bunions don't have feet like that because they wore heels for years, they have feet like that because they wore heels that were too small or too narrow for their feet for years. While I wouldn't walk 8 miles in those 5.5 inch stilettos I posted, nor wear something like that more than occasionally, they're actually not so uncomfortable as one would imagine, for the simple reason that they fit me properly.

It's not about the fit of the shoe but the unnatural position of the foot in them that causes the damage. I've seen enough reports by orthopedists who said that prolonged usage of high heels will damage the foot, tendons and can cause back pains because the entire movement apparatus of the human is changed for the worse (it may look sexy to the men but it's not healthy).

I don#t believe there's a problem if a woman wears them occasionally for a party or on the weekends when going out but wear them the whole time (such as with businesswomen) and you better expect some issues at a later age.

 

[thestrangequark]

^That's exactly what I meant by misuse...

 

[Tora Ziyal]

So is the tendency to break out in puns the strength of this board, or the Achilles' heel?

 

[captcalhoun]

i'd only want a woman to wear high heels long enough to get me from the front door to the bedroom...

 

[Balrog]

Puns, you say?!

The game's afoot!

 

[Tora Ziyal]

^

i'd only want a woman to wear high heels long enough to get me from the front door to the bedroom...

That sounds like a booty call.

 

[Mary Ann]

Oh, lordy, not puns again.

I'm 5'2" and wish I could wear high heels. I have a weak ankle and it continually collapses even when I walk in low heels. After literally falling on my ass in busy public places a few times (because these things never happen without an appreciative audience, do they?) I've given up and wear flats. I can wear solid boots with heels because they support my ankles, but I also do a lot of walking, and with my flat feet and extra weight my feet get sore in even low heels. On the bright side there are a lot of cute ballet pumps out this season.

 

[scotpens]

. . . I can wear solid boots with heels because they support my ankles, but I also do a lot of walking, and with my flat feet and extra weight my feet get sore in even low heels.

Hey, short women in boots rock!

 

[Mary Ann]

Erm, I appreciate the thought, but let's just say I don't quite look like that in boots.

BTW is that Pat Benetar in the bottom photo?

 

[scotpens]

Erm, I appreciate the thought, but let's just say I don't quite look like that in boots.

Not that many women look like that, period!

BTW is that Pat Benetar in the bottom photo?

Yeah, that’s Pat Benatar. Loved her back in the ’80s. Great voice.

I like Kylie and Avril too.

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

I could not even stand in Kylie's boots much less take a step. I would fall over and probably break something.

 

[Amaris]

I can stand in high heel boots, but my calf muscles are huge, so it's very uncomfortable to compress them further.

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

As long as the heel is chunky I can do it. It's those stilettos like chopsticks that are impossible.

Why are your calf muscles huge, do you type with your feet?