Sexy or Creepy?

[thestrangequark]

Here is what happened:

I was walking home to Brooklyn from Manhattan over the Williamsburg bridge, laden with heavy winter attire and groceries, and completely lost in my music. It was sunset, and just warm enough for me to have my wool coat unbuttoned to let in some air while I walked.

A man, not unattractive, and walking in the other direction stopped me and asked me in French if I'd studied at some university or other in Paris.
"I'm sorry," I said, "My French is really rusty, did you ask me if I went to school in Paris?"
"Yes," in a thick Parisien accent.
"No, I'm sorry, you must be thinking of someone else," I replied.
"You look very much like someone I know," he said, "You are very beautiful, may I walk with you?"
"All the way back to Brooklyn?"
"I may never see you again, I'm in New York only a week."
I say yes, we walk for five minutes exactly...the time it takes to reach the top of the bridge where the low sun is painting everything an almost bloody orange. He's here on business, what is the key I wear around my neck? have I ever been to Paris? Brooklyn is lovely, it's his first time seeing it, why am I laughing so much? Can he kiss me?
"No, I don't know you," I say.
"But we may never see eachother again," says he, all French-accented and charming.
"We're at the top of the bridge," I say, "Bijou bijou, and then you go to Manhattan and I go to Brooklyn."
He agrees.
bijou
bijou

bi-BAM! He Frenches me. Full on, tongue in mouth, hand over breast, other hand on hip, sunset illuminated kiss.

Okay, crazy Parisien man I met 5 minutes ago is Frenching me on the top of the Williamsburg bridge, I think, What do I do?
Now, my usual inclination towards men who decide to kiss me full tongue after 5 minutes idle chit-chat would be a slap in the face. Instead, I kissed him back.

Then he asked for coffee, I said maybe, he gave me his number, and turned back to Manhattan while I turned back to Brooklyn.

So, I'm replaying the scene in my head deciding whether it's sexy or creepy. It's like one of those movie trailers that's recut to different music, to make a romantic comedy look like a thriller or an adventure flick look like a gay drama.
I'm still not sure, and wondering what others think: sexy or creepy?

 

[auntiehill]

Not to sound like a mother hen, but to me, it sounds like you got assaulted by a stranger, while on your way home. He not only Frenched you but he also (if I reading this correctly) copped a feel? I think my first inclination would be to kick him where it counts and get away, while checking to see if my wallet was still in my possession.

I think the more important question is how you felt afterwards. Were you smiling? Rushing to get home and gargle? Were you shaken or flattered?

What may look creepy to me may feel flattering or romantic to you in that moment, so how YOU felt is the important thing.

 

[think]

ahhhh the romantic meeting of tongues just simialre to that movie aaaa room with a view where the kiss that changed the events of everything

or so it was portrayed heartache or not move to pairs now go with him - life is to short for these things to make sense because love is a blinding light that is never turned off.

 

[thestrangequark]

^I'm not sure...but I think that you're expressing an opinion opposite to auntiehill's?
That's the thing...I was so taken aback I didn't know what to feel! And I'm still not sure how I feel about it. Furthermore, when I texted my sisters about it, one replied, "OMG! Total rom-com moment!" while the other wrote, "OMG! Are you okay???"

I mean, I can take care of myself. I've been assaulted by strangers before and they've gotten a piece of my mind loud enough for the whole city to hear for their trouble. This wasn't like that...but I'm not really sure what it was like. It was such a strange non-sequitur moment for me, so I'm curious to hear what others think, and what they would've done in my place.

 

[Emher]

I...creepy...? Maybe...? Leaning towards creepy, voted that, but there's...something in there making it sexy as well.

I think a big factor is the fact that you found this Frenchman attractive. If this was a man you did not find attractive, surely your reaction would be different.

 

[thestrangequark]

^Indeed...my shallow nature has been exposed!

 

[Amaris]

I think it came off a tiny bit creepy, though he seems to have meant for it to be very romantic. I don't think there was any malice intended, and I think you know that, at least subconsciously, or you would have read a more dangerous "vibe" from him. Just my two cents. In all honesty, it could be very sweet. I know this much, being non-french, non-charming but all heart, if I would have tried that on a lovely lady walking home, I'd have likely ended up in jail.

So, boiled down to gravy, I think it comes off just a tad bit creepy, but ends up being much more sexy and romantic.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

^ "Boiled down to gravy"?

I agree with J. Allen/Santa Claus/Daniel Schlereth here. Seems both sexy and creepy.

 

[Emher]

^Indeed...my shallow nature has been exposed!

Perhaps so!

As for my own perception of this...I'm not really used to attention. I avoided all kinds of attention for so long that I'm not used to any kind of it. To the point that I get generally baffled when someone actually flirts with me in real life. From what I'm gathered this isn't the case for you, and you get quite a bit of attention.

If an attractive Frenchwoman did this something similar to me I'd be delighted, but as said, not really used to the attention. So I'd honestly check too see if I still had my wallet as soon as she turned her back

In the end, it's what you yourself think this was.

 

[thestrangequark]

^Interesting that you should bring up gender. Men, if an attractive woman did that would you find it romantic/sexy or creepy/scary? Does it make a difference that I am a woman? It's so funny how different people's perceptions are.

I think the milieu has a lot to do with it too. If this had happened in a dead street amongst warehouses and panel vans at 11 at night as opposed to on top of the Williamsburg bridge amongst cyclists and joggers at 4 in the afternoon things would have looked a lot different.

I don't feel taken advantage of...it was a fun kiss and I could have stopped it as soon as it started had I wanted to... but I'm still not sure what to think of the whole thing!

 

[Jetfire]

If this were a movie...
In real life...

Anyway as long as you are cool with it...

[edit] I wish there was a third option...I am not gonna vote.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Men, if an attractive woman did that would you find it romantic/sexy or creepy/scary?

I would have to say, 3/4 sexy, 1/4 creepy. And that 1/4 would mainly be due to the fact that, like Emher here, I'd wonder if she's just nicked my wallet, I mean what other reason would a hot chick do that to a total stranger?

 

[Amaris]

^ "Boiled down to gravy"?

I agree with J. Allen/Santa Claus/Daniel Schlereth here. Seems both sexy and creepy.

What can I say? I like my use of classic colloquialisms.

^Interesting that you should bring up gender. Men, if an attractive woman did that would you find it romantic/sexy or creepy/scary? Does it make a difference that I am a woman? It's so funny how different people's perceptions are.

I think the milieu has a lot to do with it too. If this had happened in a dead street amongst warehouses and panel vans at 11 at night as opposed to on top of the Williamsburg bridge amongst cyclists and joggers at 4 in the afternoon things would have looked a lot different.

Oh, I most definitely agree. This wasn't so much a moment of opportunistic assault, as it was a flash of romantic flair taken to the hilt. It's a "the stars aligned for just a moment" moment, and if it were me in your place, I would have taken it as an extraordinary compliment.

I don't feel taken advantage of...it was a fun kiss and I could have stopped it as soon as it started had I wanted to... but I'm still not sure what to think of the whole thing!

It sounds like it was a fun kiss, because you sound (as much as one can via text) as if it swept you off your feet just a bit.

 

[CorporalCaptain]

Creepy.

 

[thestrangequark]

I wonder what I'd say to all those who vote creepy if he ends up calling me for that coffee and we wind up married or something!

 

[Thestral]

^ "Boiled down to gravy"?

How do you think you get gravy?

Anyway... it sounds like such a weird romcom-esque thing that I wouldn't presume to interpret. My first reaction would probably be "creepy" but if the woman appeared to appreciate/enjoy it, that totally changes things. Really, I think J. puts it well.

As to if it happened to me from an attractive woman (which it never would )? I'd probably be confused as much as anything, but would probably go with it and enjoy it.

Didn't vote because, well, I don't honestly know.

ETA: Also, I think J. makes a good point (he does that a lot!) about you sounding a bit swept off your feet IMO.

 

[Amaris]

I wonder what I'd say to all those who vote creepy if he ends up calling me for that coffee and we wind up married or something!

I would go with something along the lines of "Ha!".

 

[Emher]

^Interesting that you should bring up gender. Men, if an attractive woman did that would you find it romantic/sexy or creepy/scary? Does it make a difference that I am a woman? It's so funny how different people's perceptions are.

I didn't really mean my comment to be a statement on gender differences, it was more of a personal difference, and you and I happen to be of opposite sexes.

That being said, it's not a totally invalid question. I can't really say my gender specific response would be much different then my personal one though.

I wonder what I'd say to all those who vote creepy if he ends up calling me for that coffee and we wind up married or something!

Well, then this is all part of the "getting together" story!

 

[thestrangequark]

^huh?
Perhaps I was a little swept off my feet. Maybe all the doubters could take some tips. Then again, maybe I'm acting a giddy schoolgirl...either way, I've not made up my mind yet what to say should he call for coffee. Though I've decided as he's already stolen a kiss, I'm not going to make it so easy as to be the one who calls him.

 

[CorporalCaptain]

he's already stolen a kiss

Well, this is precisely why I went to creepy. The fact that you are conflicted about it makes you vulnerable. In fact, I think he took advantage of your vulnerability. But I'm not going to go on and on about it. That's really all I have to say on the subject, you know, take it or leave it. Ain't my life.