TNG Caption This 238: Officers Thinking

[LeadHead]

Happy Saturday to everyone! Sorry about being a little late to getting this up and running. A little busy today. Anyhoo, lets get to some winners!

We had the honor of a guest judge this week, Smellincoffee! So lets see the winners!

First up to the plate, we have the "Student of Humanity" Award, going to:

TROI: Good lord, Will!

PICARD I didnt know that was possible.

DATA: I shall have to update my database of techniques.

Next, we have the "Futuristic doesn't mean Better" Award, going to:

Ro: "Well?"

Geordi: "Bobbing for dilithium just isn't as fun as bobbing for apples. On that note, I'm going to need a dermal regenerator."

Next, we have the "SECURITY!!! KILL THEM ALL!!!" Award, going to:

Worf: "I would like to schedule a battle simulation for this afternoon."

Will: "I have the crew promotion evalutions ready for you review."

Kate: "Selar thinks the away team may have brought aboard a virus that wasn't picked up by the transporter."

Jean Luc: "Oh for the love of.... You'd think on a ship of this size, a guy could find a quiet place for a cat nap."

Next, we have the "Go Short, go really short!" Award, going to:

Even the large Enterprise crew quarters still made it difficult to play indoor football, which Ensign Ro was about to be reminded.

Next, we have the " " Award, going to:

Picard tended to use a limited range of emoticons...

Our Photoshop Award goes to:

Riker: "I don't believe it. 36 hours straight."
Pulaski: "This makes Barclay's transporter psychosis look like a picnic."
Worf: "But at least he was victorious. Look at the score!"

Geordi's success with women continues...

Congrats to all of our winners! Now, there's one person who hasn't claimed their prize yet. Vulpes, who appears to have at least for now, to have fled the TrekBBS some months ago. I may randomly decide to give that prize away, should we not hear anything after awhile.

In any case, new contest!

Enjoy!

 

[LeadHead]

Geordi: I'm sorry Sir, this is the last of the Orange Soda left in the sector.

Worf: Dang! They started without me.

Riker: Yay! You're back! Aw, crap. You brought Wesley back too.

Picard: I..... WILL.... FIGURE.... OUT.......MY........PASSWORD!

Data: You know, you really should transfer to Engineering...

 

[Holdfast]

PICARD: Even after everything, Beverly still looks beautiful in the right light.

EVERYONE: Eeeehhhh, MACARENA!!!

The slow handclap back onto the bridge was the worst thing about Picard's early elimination from the pan-galactic spelling bee.

PICARD: But it's really cool! The blue bird splits into three, the black bird blows up, and the white bird drops egg bombs!
CRUSHER: It's time to step away from the touchscreen, Jean-Luc.

DATA: What's the matter Geordi; can't see which button to press?

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Worf: "Well...this makes it official. 'Cheers' on Earth is now the only bar in history to have never had a barroom brawl."

Worf (thinking): "Gad, what a bunch of suck-ups!"

Picard: "This Fan Fiction.net site has a number of rather racy stories featuring you and me!"
Crusher: "The ones on Adult Fan Fiction.net are racier!"

 

[Velocity]

Picard: On the catwalk--I shake my little tush on the catwalk!

 

[Finn]

*Wesley starts clapping*

*Data whispers into Wesley's ear*

*Wesley stops clapping*

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Picard: "Is this fine Arcturian brandy or an Andorian urine sample? They really should label these things!"

 

[Smellincoffee]

Picard: It says here I 'poked' her. What's that mean?
Crusher: Jean-Luc. Did you really poke Admiral Necheyev?

Picard: Oh, for god's sake. All I did was straighten my tunic.
Worf: But you did it so smoothly.
Riker: Without being obvious about it!
Geordi: You were flawless, captain! You stoodup, and just like that your hands were sliding down --
Wesley: We can call it the Picard Manuever!
Picard: (rolls eyes)

Worf, growling: What is going on here?
Riker: Don't you pay attention to current events, Worf? FA Cup finals today on Earth.

 

[Nerys Myk]

LAFORGE: Its the latest addition to my urine collection.

PICARD: Not really a hit with ladies, are you LaForge?

LAFORGE: What makes you say that?

PICARD: Call it a hunch.

RIKER: Some call the ship a garbage scow again?

It became apparent that Stewart was having trouble transistioning from the stage to the screen,
when he insisted on applause and curtain calls.

PICARD: How did they get a picture of me in assless chaps?

DATA: Have any naked pictures of your girlfriend?

GEORDI: No, of course not!

DATA: Wanna buy some?

 

[KNH]

Picard: So what are those two orion girls going to do with that cup...?

 

[Finn]

Picard: I hate those Facebook polls. I don't even know this Kesley Grammer person.

 

[SilentP]

Picard: When did you record these? I don't remember you setting up the holo-cam.

Beverly: Well I always do with any man, I just thought you'd like to have these for yourself

*pause as Picard contemplates the words 'always do' and 'with any man'*

Picard: Well, we best keep them secret, wouldn't do to have people find out about these kind of things...

Data *whispering*: Hey Geordi, I was hacking through the personnel files, and look what I found in the captain's private folder? Reckon I should forward it to the crew?


LATER

Riker: Nice going there, sir!

Troi: Yes, Captain, who knew you ever had that kind of flexibility?

Worf *thinking*: There are some things that one should really not know about your commanding officer...especially what he likes to do with barbeque sauce and a flannel.

 

[Gary7]

Thanks for the wins, Leadhead!

Picard: "You paid $125,000 credits on an eBay auction for THIS? Juice?"
LaForge: "It's no ordinary juice, sir. It's the last few ounces of Tranya from Captain Kirk's personal effects!"

Worf: "It's looks like we're a little late for the Fight Club meeting, Commander Riker."
Riker: "Darn it. I was supposed to be first, too."

The scene we never saw aired after Vash left the ship.

Picard: "Wesley wrote THAT on my Spacebook wall? I'll kill him, I swear--"
Crusher: "Jean Luc?"
Picard: "Oh, Beverly! Sorry, I didn't see you come in..." *blush*

Data: "I do not understand why you humans do not fall asleep in these reclining lounge chairs. I for one get a bit drowsy, and I am an android!"
LaForge: **snore**

 

[Mysterion]

WORF (thinking): This applauding every time he shows up ain't gonna last for seven seasons, I'll tell you that.

 

[TigerOfDarkness]

Thanks for the win!!

Riker: Another debate on the merits of JJ Trek?

 

[LeadHead]

Worf: As you can see Commander, this is a Holographic representation of TNZ.

 

[JarodRussell]

Picard: You think there's a connection between Riker and this slime?
Geordi: Is the atomic weight of cobalt 58.9?

 

[CorporalCaptain]

Geordi: It's called red matter. It will increase efficiency of the warp engines by a factor of ten billion.

Picard: What? That's the stupidest damn thing I've ever heard.

 

[Finn]

Picard: What is it?

Geordi: I...actually, I'm not sure yet... It's orange.

Picard: *Gibbs slaps Geordi* I need to thank Commander Riker for the NCIS DVDs he got me for Federation Day.

 

[Bob Karo]

Picard: And this is all?

Geordi: Yes, sir. That's the last of the real booze onboard.

Picard: That's it! He has to go. Get him off my ship. I don't care if you have to give him one of the shuttles!