DS9 Caption Contest #31: Good Times... Good Times...

[Isis]

Quark thought it made good business sense to be a U.S. presidential candidate...<brief pause>...at least until the birthers caught on.

 

[TiberiusMaximus]

Bashir, thinking: Oh, my, do I always look this ridiculous?
Odo, thinking: Hmph. The only reason they say my face isn't realistic is because they're jealous.
Sisko, thinking: How did I manage to get so good looking?
Goldshirt, thinking: Why exactly did we put a mirror here?

 

[Finn]

Kira: Yep... *taps buttons*

(the [insert technobabble] that Miles is in) *snip snip*

Miles: But I wasn't the one who impregnated you, Major!"

Sisko: Report, Major
Kira: (OS) We found little sign of inverted phi emissions in the Tylan System.
Sisko: Alright, I look forward to the rest of your report at the debriefing.
Kira: And stop it, Odo! You barely have a peach fuzz. You are a shapeshifter and you can't even grow a badass goatee!

Jadzia: I don't care if Curzon did it on Qu'nos!
Worf: But you have his memories. You should be able to...
Jadzia: Stop it. I bet you would expect the next Dax host to do everything I do.

Worf: What happened?
Bashir: I told her that Jadzia would have a difficult time carrying your child.

 

[Isis]

Dusting was Kira's least favorite chore, especially when one of the knickknacks in the room was a Miles O'Brien bobblehead.

Odo: "So Clark Kent and Superman really are one and the same."

 

[Velocity]

So, Q and I were drinking together and I said "You aren't half the man I am" and Q said "oh yeah?"....

Odo: Well, he'll be able to fit through the conduits a lot easier...after he learns to walk on his hands, that is.

 

[Mistral]

O'Brien: "Major-don't open that file!"

Nerys: "What the heck is 'Sissy Girls" anyway?"

 

[Odo]

- All looking on as Jadzia and Worf kiss passionately -

Sisko (thinking): Mm-hm! I wish Starfleet women still wore what they did back in day - the Old Man would look good in a skirt. I'm going have to see about station regulations...

Odo (thinking): They've been there for five minutes already, and they're still blocking the stairway exit. If it gets up to six I'm taking them down. Five-minutes-and-ten-seconds, five-minutes-and eleven-seconds...five-minutes-and-tweleve...

Goldshirt (thinking): Thank God I transfered here. She looks even better in real life than she did in Quark's holosuite program. Maybe I'll tell the misuz I'm working late tonight again...

Bashir (muttering): Must...kill...Worf...

 

[Finn]

Odo.. without the ital. oh ok.

welcome

 

[Captain Zog]

O' Brien: "Christ, me hemorrhoids are after burstin"

Senior DS9 crew-members are entranced by the relatively high production standards of the long-awaited Dukat sex tape.

Mexican Wave fever grips DS9 after the Mexicans conquer the Federation.

Worf: "Can't we just give anal a chance? Pretty please?

Dax: "Ugh, not this again. I have a headache."

Bashir: "Lightspeed Laxative - it does exactly what it says on the tin."

 

[LeadHead]

And we have a new contest! Right this way please...