I have just thought of one of the worst neighbours one could have - Hyacinth Bucket.
Who would you hate to have as a neighbour?
- Thread starter Miss Chicken
- Start date
If Fred Astaire were my upstairs neighbor, I’m sure he’d be willing to work out an arrangement so his dance practice wouldn’t disturb me. He was a gentleman.
Thank goodness. I was going to make a reference to some real-life, notorious "gardening enthusiasts" (shall we say) with whom some UK posters here will be familiar, but decided not to at the last minute in case it offended anyone.
Instead, my fictional neighbours from hell would have to be the Borg collective.
They'd keep on coming round to my house to ask if they could assimilate my lawn mower, and it would be hard to resist their car boot sales and carrot cakes. If I tried to make excuses to not join in, they'd merely adapt to my excuses or declare them "irrelevant" and try again.
Pretty soon, they'd have the whole neighbourhood under their spell, and might even consider running for local government.
Me. My grass is totally overgrown because as soon as I enter my house I forget it exists and no one else who lives here even notices it. I have too many cats and my cats are assholes. I don't have a car but I let an eccentric person store his trailer full of.. stuff.. in my driveway because it seems like a nice thing to do. Except the stuff is a total eyesore and keeps growing in height. It is currently held down by four enormous tires and looks like an art installation which I enjoy but I am sure no one else does. Last Christmas one of my relatives got extremely drunk and passed out on my neighbors lawn which might have been acceptable (this is the country of booze) except we had Christmas 5 days after the actual date of Christmas so it just looked like they were drunk in the middle of the day without Jesus's birthday as a good reason for it. Try explaining to your neighbor as you drag your drunk relative inside "well you see it's Christmas.." when it isn't.
When my husband and I were separated and I lived with the kids in Canada I let my lawn go to hell because I didn't have the time or energy to...oh, all right; I'm simply couldn't be arsed to maintain it. I'm sure all the neighbours hated me for it, which made it even more fun. I'd mow the lawn about once a month, if that, so the dandelions and thistles (I refuse to use chemicals in my garden) were so bad that I was tempted to put a "Triffid Farm" sign in the front garden. We had wild rabbits living under the deck in our back garden, which wouldn't have happened if I'd maintained the lawn and flower beds.I only had two cats but they roamed freely, while most people there only had indoor cats. No one ever complained to me about them ( of course it's possible that my lawn scared people off), but my cats must have been using other people's gardens as litter boxes because they never did anything in our garden.
Miss Chicken, I'd love to live next door to The Bucket Woman, but that's because I have an evil streak and I'd enjoy driving her nuts.
If I lived next door to "Mrs Bouquet" I would feel so sorry for poor, sweet suffering Richard that I would probably have to do her in.
But I guess Richard actually loves her.
But I guess Richard actually loves her.
No offense intended, but you sound like a Jeff Foxworthy joke.
They were probably scared off by the rabbits.
Do you mean the neighbours, or the cats?
If it's the latter...no. The bigger cat weighs 16 lbs and is seriously foul-tempered . This is a cat that regularly tells our oversized Golden Retriever to get stuffed (in our house toy breed dogs are called "Holly snacks"). She's a big cat with a big territory which requires a lot of marking, and these rabbits were small enough that she could have killed one had she caught it. Thankfully that never happened. She's now 11 years old and slowing down a bit, but she still terrorises every other cat who dares to set a paw in her territory. And I did not see her take a dump in the neighbour's gravelled front garden the other day. 
I'd hate to live next to Marcel Marceau. He'd make ME feel like I was living in a box.
I'd hate to live next to Young Frankenstein's castle what with all the violin playing, the horses whimmying, loud buzzing of Tesla coils and some woman singing "Oh Sweet Mystery Of Life I've Found You" loudly all night.
Also I'd hate to live next to The Blind Guy. He'd insist on dragging me into his house to smash my beverage mug, pour hot soup into my lap and set my thumb on fire.
Robert
Also I'd hate to live next to The Blind Guy. He'd insist on dragging me into his house to smash my beverage mug, pour hot soup into my lap and set my thumb on fire.
Robert
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Okay, characters instead of my original reply: Jem'Hadar.
Plus, I think they're Time Lords. Their house is much bigger on the inside than it is on the outside.
My fun answer would be Charlie Sheen. Yeah it might be fun to party with porn stars and get blind stinking drunk like once a year, but damn, not every day!
Anybody who owns a small dog. I hate those dogs so much. They just never shut up. And pit bulls, I hate those things too. And pugs. The bigger, less-deformed ones I don't mind, Dalmations and Great Danes and such. But the little, white-trash, Paris Hilton ones? Ugh...
There was actually one time my brother and I had been seriously contemplating poisoning the neighbor's dog because they kept letting the thing shit in our yard and chase after our pets, despite multiple complaints to the owner of the trailer park I'd lived in at the time.
There was actually one time my brother and I had been seriously contemplating poisoning the neighbor's dog because they kept letting the thing shit in our yard and chase after our pets, despite multiple complaints to the owner of the trailer park I'd lived in at the time.
My boss.
I would hate to live next to someone with a bunch of loud dogs.
I would hate to live next to someone with a basketball thing right near the road.
I would hate to live with anyone that decides to have their light on all night with a high watt shining throught my curtains. Your not out there then turn off your lights. Christs I can see if it was in the front yard not your freaking backyard!
I hate loud kids
I would hate to live next to someone with a basketball thing right near the road.
I would hate to live with anyone that decides to have their light on all night with a high watt shining throught my curtains. Your not out there then turn off your lights. Christs I can see if it was in the front yard not your freaking backyard!
I hate loud kids
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