24 hours later
The doorbell chimed, startling Commander Lyle to attention. He straightened out his uniform and asked the visitor to enter.
The woman the parting doors revealed was the last person that he expected. Sulhir… Dressed in civvies, instead of a standard issue uniform, she simply stood there. Malcolm had it a figured out, to stand sternly while receiving the mother of all dress downs in Starfleet history. To accept any reprimand that she might have deemed appropriate.
But instead of shouting about how he had disgraced his uniform by putting his own wished ahead of his duty, she spoke softly,
“I’m not disturbing, am I?” Vaz asked taking a few steps inside.
A bit confused, Lyle forced a smile. One that Sulhir didn’t appear to notice. “Not at all Captain. Have a seat. Can I get you anything?”
“No,” she shook her head, “I’m quite fine, thank you. I came to talk.”
His entire demeanor changed. Like a blanket of sadness had enveloped him, “I see…” he trailed off. “If I had known you were conscious, I would have visited.”
She smiled. “It’s perfectly all right, nothing serious. The doc didn’t like my Isoboramine levels so he knocked me out with a hypo. ‘Said that as long I wear this,” she pointed at a small device attached to her neck, “Whatever this is, I can return to duty. How are you?”
“Well, I suppose. Although, I have four weeks I have to catch up with overtime,” he smiled.
She held up a hand to silence him, “Consider it medical leave. I’ve already taken care of the paperwork.”
“You really didn’t need to do that, Captain. And I’m ready to accept any reprimand or punishment you deem appropriate,” he said straightening himself.
She gave him a wry smile, “Reprimand for what? My report to HQ states that you made a miraculous recovery after a severe injury received in the line of duty. And I assume Dr. Cor will say the same in his report. Besides, they should give you a medal. The Cardassians are finally speaking to us again. After all, that’s the important part.”
A wide smile appeared on his face, “I believe a thank you is needed. So, thank you, Captain.” He bowed his head slightly in respect.
“Sully, or Sulhir. We’re off duty, number one. And you’re welcome. You know the way I run this ship, we take care of family.” she smiled broadly.
“Nonetheless, I owe you one.”
“Perhaps, perhaps not. Either way, I came here in case you wanted to talk.”
Lyle rose slowly and approached the window. The Kir’Shara orbited Starbase Delta in a graceful elliptic orbit. The matte grey hull of the starbase camouflaged it among the asteroids now known as New Thalax. “I didn’t want you to see all that. Not exactly one of my finest moments as you might imagine. I would completely understand if you no longer want me as your first officer.”
She walked up next to him. Gazing the stars for a moment before she spoke, “There is an old human saying, Malcolm. ‘To falter is human.’ ”
“But we’re not human. At least, in your case, not entirely.”
“Yes, that is true,” she agreed. “However I believe this is a sentiment that is apt for any species. El Aurians, Trills and Humans alike.”
He said nothing. Several minutes of silence passed before he spoke again.
“I was the equivalent of a thirteen year old human child when I took my father’s shuttle for a joyride. The stupidest thing I ever did,” he smiled, “On my way back, I picked up a distress call from a freighter. Their warp core was going critical. I adjusted my course and went to assist them. By the time I reached them, there was nothing they could do to save the ship so I locked on with the shuttle’s transporter. There were twenty three people aboard, but I could only get a solid lock on three. One of them materialized, a boy close to my own age, but the shock wave knocked out the transporter. By the time I landed, their patterns were too degraded for rematerialization… To this day, I don’t know if they were his parents or not. But I suppose it didn’t really matter.”
“Ke’olan,” Sulhir said kindly, “The boy you saved was Ke’olan. Wasn’t he?”
He nodded, “The universe has a way of balancing itself. I saved him once, and then, decades later, I had to kill him. One hell of an arrangement, isn’t it?”
Sulhir locked eyes with him. “What you did…was his wish. You must know that he would have suffered more than you can imagine if he had been allowed to transform. And I'm sure you would have wanted the same thing in his position. I know I would have.”
“Yes. And I made the right choice.” he replied, “But that doesn’t change the fact that I killed my brother. Because that’s what he was, genetics aside.”
She gave the asteroid belt a fleeting look before turning back towards him. Finding new strength in her words, “We’ve all had to make difficult decisions. I’Nora knows, I’ll never forget that. We will probably never be able to atone for what we did, but that shouldn’t stop us from trying.”
He looked at her quizzically, “You, Captain?” he asked, completely stunned by her statement.
She nodded, “Yes. One of my former hosts, Colonel Fremerin Vaz, had to leave his wife behind in hostile territory. Until the last Vaz host dies, we will remember.”
“I see…” Malcolm nodded slowly, and then he turned back towards the window, appearing thoughtful. “A Mind Meld is a complicated phenomenon, wouldn’t you say? There can be many side effects…”
“Indeed,” Vaz agreed, “Your point?”
“Is that not only memories are transferred, but emotions as well. Feelings.”
Sulhir mood darkened. So this is what he means. Great… she mused. “Malcolm,” she began. But knowing that she wouldn’t be able to finish the sentence, she remained silent.
Malcolm regarded her for a moment, but the rising level of discomfort forced her to leave. She almost did, but ultimately decided that if they didn’t talk it through, they probably wouldn’t be able to work together. So she took a seat in the nearby couch.
Hearing her calling, Malcolm left the window and sat down on the opposite side of the table.
“So…” she trailed off. After a moment of silence, she added, “No, forget it.”
“Very well,” Malcolm rose again. “Was there anything else?” he asked.
“Nope.” she forced a smile. “I’m good.”
“Alright, Captain. See you at oh-nine-hundred.”
“Aye, Commander. Don’t be late,” she smiled, “G’night.”
“Good night, sir.”
She headed for the door. Satisfied with once again managing to dodge the bullet. Everything was fine, her first officer was back on his feet, the ship was running more smoothly than ever, and they had finally gotten a mission that they could be proud of. The constant shipping of equipment was wearing out the crew. And as the captain of fastest ship in the fleet, Sulhir was quite tired of it. Not that she considered equipment and aid shipments unimportant, but it was still immensely boring. At least a diplomatic mission would relieve some tension. Or I will have a mutiny on my hands, she thought with mock fear.
Just as the doors parted, she came to a halt and turned around. “Malcolm?” she called out.
He remained at the window, “Yes, Captain?”
Sulhir took a few steps inside again. The doors closing behind her the moment she was out of sensor range.
“Listen. You’re my first officer. We work together every day. We need to clear the air.”
“Agreed,” he nodded, still with his back towards her.
“Alright. I wasn’t planning on you finding out, but you did. Albeit its technically not against regulation, it’s still inappropriate--”
“How long?” he asked, cutting her off.
“I don’t know,” she pondered the question, “A few months perhaps, but I wasn’t sure until four weeks ago. I understand if you feel uncomfortable around me. I don’t blame you. But I’m dealing with. Alright? I--“
“Don’t.”
“I beg your pardon?” She asked, approaching him.
“While I was…unconscious. I learned something, Sully,” He said, pausing for a moment.
“Not only about you, but about myself. I’m stuck in the past. I was changed by El Auria’s destruction one-hundred-fifty years ago. It’s been keeping me from living. From moving on. Kept me from seeing what was right in front of me. You,”
“Me?”
“Don’t deal with it, Sully,” He turned towards her. Looking straight in her eyes, “Embrace it,”
“Travel to every star in the universe, and return with their secrets.” ~ Vice Admiral Jennifer T’Cha Alasera, Dedication plaque of USS Kir’Shara, NX-93873
), I like the content. 
)
