Too Many Decisions

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous' started by Amaris, Nov 5, 2010.

  1. PKTrekGirl

    PKTrekGirl Arrogant Niner Thug Admiral

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    J., I was faced with this decision last year. My elderly cocker spaniel was deaf and blind, but otherwise healthy for a long time...and the vet told me that as long as she had me and my other dog to keep her company and was well looked after, petted, and part of the family,she was good. However, last August she started to get sick and after about 2 days of diarrhea, I took her in to the vet. Bottom line - I let the vet make the decision. I trust my vet, and told him that I believed he knew what was best for the dog...and he said that he thought it 'was time'. I accepted that decision and we put her down that day, with me and my other dog right next to her, up against her so she would know we were with her.

    I know how difficult these decisions can be - if it had been up to me, I'd have wanted the dog to live forever.

    But if you have a vet that you really trust, like I did, it can really help you do the right thing. I just decided to relinquish the decision to him - he knows better than I do what dogs are really going through, their probable pain levels, etc....and I felt like his educated decision was the best thing for Annabelle.

    Not sure if that helps...and I really hope your dog is okay. But in my case, it really helped that I had a vet I really trusted.
     
  2. Amaris

    Amaris Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    Thanks, PKTrekGirl. Yeah, I really trust this vet. He's been her vet since the day we brought her in for her first immunizations. That was 15 years ago. Dallie recognizes him and always greets him like an old friend, so yes, I do trust my vet. If he says it's best for her, I know he means it.
     
  3. WillsBabe

    WillsBabe Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Dec 27, 2002
    J, you always have comforting words for others here on the bbs. I just want you to know that I am thinking of you at this time and I know that you have got other good advice here to make the right decision.
     
  4. Niorah

    Niorah Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    Londinium, Britannia
    I am glad your mother came through, I hope she will be feeling better soon and that she'll be back on her feet in no time. Give her my best and my heartfelt wishes. :)

    As for your Dallie, I am sorry but you know what you have to do.
    Just a couple of years ago our beloved cat was suffering because of a tumor himself, and we all agreed that as soon as we could see signs of distress in his everyday life we would ease his pain and let him go. And we did. It's always hard, painful and traumatic to lose a friend, but deep inside you know it would be just egotistical to keep her around in a weak and miserable state because of pain and disease.
    Again, I am very sorry, it's not the first time you talk about Dallie and I do have an idea of how much you love her. Be strong.
     
  5. Amaris

    Amaris Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    Thank you, WillsBabe. It is greatly appreciated. :)

    You bet I will. :D

    Today was a small victory. I gave her some water, she ate a little bit of food, I skritched her behind the ears, and held out the leash and asked her if she wanted to go potty, just to see if she would try to stand up. She did! She stood up, wobbly at first, and slowly stepped out of her bed and walked toward the leash. I hooked it to her collar, slowly and carefully walked her outside, she did her business, and walked inside, right back to her bed. I was ecstatic! The cortisone and anti-biotic is definitely working.

    So, yes, I know what I have to do, and you're right. I know that this is no way for her to live, but it does encourage me that when I have to face that decision, and it will be soon, that she will go with quiet dignity instead of being too far gone to be aware, and I will take solace in that.

    Oh, and to everyone here who has lost a pet, regardless of how it had to be done, you have my most sincere condolences. It really is heartbreaking, and it takes a great deal of courage.
     
  6. TerokNor

    TerokNor Captain Captain

    Joined:
    Mar 26, 2010
    If she still has the chance to pull threw and live some more time without pain, try chicken soup. I got my dog threw an illness, that nearly killed her, where she also did not want to eat anymore with chicken soup.
    The only thing...after this illness, she always wants chicken soup now and we freshly have to cook it for her about 3-4 times a month and freeze portions, so she can have chicken soup every day. But oh well... I´d cook it every day, if she needed me too. *g*

    Terokor
     
  7. Amaris

    Amaris Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    I'm going to try that. Thank you. Let's see if she'll eat a little chicken soup. :D
     
  8. TerokNor

    TerokNor Captain Captain

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    Mar 26, 2010
    But dont put as much salt in the soup as you would for a human, just a little. Also I usually do the soup over some oatmeal, though it has still to be quite liquit. The carrots and so on inside their I mash up and the soup should really contain lots of chicken. May not sound tasty with the oatmeal, but my dog loves it.
    Hope she eats some. :)

    TerokNor
     
  9. Amaris

    Amaris Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    ^ Thanks for the suggestion. Unfortunately, she didn't eat any of it, but I did get her to eat a teaspoon of peanut butter, so that's something. But if I can get her appetite up, I'll try again later. :)
     
  10. Captain Ice

    Captain Ice Cookie Constructor Admiral

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    It may not be the hardest thing you'll ever have to do, but it sure is going to feel like it when it happens. As others have said, you have to ask yourself what's best for her and not for yourself. When the time comes trust me, you will know. It will break your heart, but take solace in that it will break your heart to watch her suffer. It sounds like you are getting close to that point (even if not right now) and I don't envy you the decision that you have to make.

    As for your Mom, don't worry about being more concerned about the dog than you are about her. We know you love your Mom and are doing what you can to help her heal faster. The dog is in far more grave a condition and it's right that you are asking yourself where you are going to find the strength to make the decision when the time comes.

    BTW - I agree with you. 2010 needs to end and quickly. This year SUCKS!
     
  11. TerokNor

    TerokNor Captain Captain

    Joined:
    Mar 26, 2010
    Pitty she didn´t eat it. Though seems she is a sweet tooth. ;)
    What helps to raise appitite quite well is CaniBac Gel (normally used for getting the gut flora going again), though try only such things, if you feel sure she still wants to live.
    What we also did was giving her with an injection (without the needle on it) a electrolyte-water stuff in the mouth, around every 30 minutes....though we had to do that mainly, because of the strong diarrhoea she had. No ida if this something also done, when the dog does not eat, but does not has diarrhoea.
    Oh and also good are homeopathic medicines... she got those too and for her that things are helping, though no idea which one would be the right one for your dog in that situation.

    TerokNor
     
  12. Deckerd

    Deckerd Fleet Arse Premium Member

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    the Frozen Wastes
    Sorry John, haven't been on this weekend. As a fellow dog nut if you want to talk just PM me. Nothing makes it easy but sometimes a one-to-one helps. So pleased about your Mum. She sounds like a trooper.
     
  13. The Sneeze Police

    The Sneeze Police Captain Captain

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    East Coast of the US
    Here is another person pulling for you & your family! You are such a kind person, I have to believe that the rest of your family is equally nice. I am sorry you are in such a predicament with your sweet dog...you love her and you recognize the power of healing she represents for your mom.

    Because I am away for irregular periods of time, I only have cats, but I love dogs as well. Although I am hoping your dog will pull through for your mom's sake...but if the time comes that your dog needs peace...can you ask your vet to come to your home? It would be a kindness for her not to have to make that final journey to the vet's office. Some vets are willing to make that final visit to make it easier for the dog (and in my case one of my cats).
     
  14. Australis

    Australis Writer - Australis Admiral

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    Really pleased to hear she's starting to come round, J. It may not be forever, she's not young, but every day is golden, every day.
     
  15. Amaris

    Amaris Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    Thank you all for the kind words, and Captain Ice, thank you so much for your post, I mean it, and I can't wait for this year to go away, either. Yeah ELK, my mom's just as sweet as I am, and stubborn, kind to a fault, and most importantly, humble. :ouch:

    Yes, Australis, each day is a golden day. A minor victory, and I will take each one that I have left. Terok Nor, I got Dallie to drink a little bit of milk last night, so at least that's something. Deckerd, Right now I'm just doing my best to make her comfortable, to make her feel good. Some of my family insists I should try the surgery, but it's such a long shot, and the outcome so uncertain. I don't want to put her through that kind of procedure if it's not going to actually help, and the odds are even more likely, given her advanced age, that she would die on the operating table. What kind of passing is that? If I choose to have her euthanized, it can be done outside, in the warm sun, in the grass, with me right beside her. I would think that would be preferable to going under on a cold operating table surrounded by strangers and never waking up.
     
  16. propita

    propita Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    fresno, ca, us
    My parents had a dog (Buttons) that had gotten on in years and was not doing well. The vet said the same thing ... try some food, see if he’ll eat and bring him in in 4 days. Mom very little cooked up some hamburger (people food), so it would be soft for Buttons. He ate for a couple of days, not much, and the vet was amazed that he was alive 4 days later, but then Buttons stopped eating and started avoiding us--from a dog who would always be in the room people were in. The vet said he was going away to die and that we should bring him in. Buttons was a good dog. He was a black poodle, around 25 pounds and annoyingly smart; smart enough to try and trick us on occasion.
     
  17. RJDiogenes

    RJDiogenes Idealistic Cynic and Canon Champion Premium Member

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    ^^ One of the great injustices of life is that our Pets live such a short time compared to our own lives. :(

    J, I'm glad to hear Dallie is doing a bit better. I hope she continues to improve. Remember Mallory-- anything is possible. :mallory:
     
  18. MANT!

    MANT! Vice Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Mar 14, 2005
    Location:
    in Atomo-vision

    My middle son, at 8 years of age had a dog named "Bingo".

    One day we came home and Bingo couldn't walk...

    We went to the local vet, some X-rays were taken, some tests made, and we were given the verdict, Bingo had stomach cancer, probably malignant, and the only thing that could be done was surgery, at approx $5000.00 . My budget couldn't afford such a huge hit..So I told my little boy that his dog would be put down. He looked up at me and asked that he could be there with Bingo..because "I don't want him to die with stranger's around.."


    And my 8 year old bravely did just that...


    Don't let the poor animal suffer anymore than you have to...
     
  19. ancientone51

    ancientone51 Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Apr 27, 2001
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    Texas, USA
    J Allen I am so sorry about your dog. have had that problem myself. The choice is never easy, but you will know what to do when it has to be done.

    Glad there is good news with your mom. She sounds like a truly lovely lady.

    I also vote for a quick end to 2010.
     
  20. Amaris

    Amaris Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    United States
    Thanks everybody. I mean it. For a while this evening, I was very depressed, because she wouldn't take her medicines, and she wouldn't even move. You had to lean down to hear her breathing. About half an hour ago, though, she got up, and went in my room where her second bed is, and laid on that! That was the first time she had done that in over a week! Then, she ate a whole slice of cheese, and a small piece of burger! I cried like a little baby and hugged her for a good ten minutes! :lol:

    So regardless of what happens ahead, and what must happen, her demeanor is improving, and that heartens me.

    So a while ago, I went up to the hospital to visit my mom. I will say this, I'm annoyed with some of the nurses in that hospital. When I went in there, she had been calling them for 20 minutes because she was cold, and was also in a poor position on her bed (she can't stand up yet) where she was in danger of falling off. After I got her righted and comfortable again, I went to the linen room, got her a blanket myself, covered her up, turned up the thermostat a degree or two, and tucked her in. She had stains on her pillows where they had changed IVs and didn't clean it up, so I switched out her pillows. Her IV unit started beeping because it was nearly empty, and after 15 minutes of no nurse showing up, I called the button for the nurses. 10 minutes pass, no one answers. I walk down to the nurse's station, no one's there. I walk all about that hallway, no one in sight. Finally, 45 minutes later, someone arrives and presses the IV button and leaves. Comes back 10 minutes later with a new bag. I was fuming.

    I was upset because she can't eat, she can't drink water, and so depends upon that IV to keep her hydrated. These people don't get in any hurry. I was getting ready to leave for the night, around 10 PM, and I could hear this little old lady calling out for help in her room. She kept saying "I need some help, please!". I went to find a nurse to let them know the lady needed help (her call signal was beeping so it's not like they didn't know), and they said they'd take care of it. I certainly hope they did.

    I'm thinking about writing a letter.