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Movie Caption Contest #162: Crisis Management

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PRESIDENT: Why would they want your recipe for jambalaya?

CARWRIGHT: No idea. I don't even cook!


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SCOTTY: How long till the Captain figures out all we been doing back here is playing video games?

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OLD LADY: Weren't you on that Star Track show?
 
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Spock: "Fascinating. It would appear that Mr. Scott's flatulence is in tune with the probe's broadcasts."

Scotty: "So you're saying that I'm not only fat as a whale, I sound like one too? Borgas frat!"
 
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McCoy: "What's your name, darling?"
Andie: "Andie McDowell. I've been aging rapidly since St Elmo's Fire and now I think I'm gonna die. Looks like I'll never achieve my life long dream."
McCoy: "Take these, they'll help. By the way, what if your dream?"
Andie (swallows pill, starts to de-age): "Do anti-wrinkle cream commercials"
 
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President: Time is running out, we have to make a decision soon!

Cartwright: Commander, we need that information!

Commander: We're 4th down and long, we're gonna have to punt.

President: Not again!
 
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President: "This probe must be stopped, I think, we- shit Cartright, what the hell is wrong with your left hand? It looks like you only have fingers up to your first knuckle. What, did you put it in a mechanical rice picker again?"
 
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CARTWRIGHT: It's worse than we thought, Mr. President.

The probe has disabled every starship and science vessel in the solar system...and now I can't microwave my Hot Pockets.


PRESIDENT ROTH: Dear Heavens!!!


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SPOCK: There.

You should be able to pick up Glenn Beck's program now.
 
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Cartwright: So, Lieutenant, tell me. Is it a Shop?



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Scotty: Spock, I hate to tell you this but these Klingon bastards don't have a high-speed connection. You'll have to use dial-up.

Spock: Is now a good time for a colorful metaphor?


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Spock: Dammit, Jim! I told you, no pictures!
Kirk: Hand over the money or this goes on facebook. You'll be seen as a old-person mollestor before you were ever born.
 
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McCoy: A sneezeguard? Why would you put a sneezeguard over an old lady? You only use those things for stuff like salad bars and all you can eat buf... My god Jim! These people are cannibals!

Old Lady: It's an oxygen tent dumdass.
 
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McCoy: What happened to you?

Old Lady: I'm preemptively ill, the way these contests are going, we'll be doing The Final Frontier Next week and Generations 2 weeks after that!
 
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CARTWRIGHT: "Daddy Bear" is not an appropriate form of address for the President!
PRESIDENT: Well, let's not be hasty...


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SCOTTY: Aye...it's worse that I thought. We've got...Okudagrams.


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BONES: What is this? The Spanish Inquisition?
WOMAN: Nobody expects the Spanish Inquistion!
 
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