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My Body Language Is Horrible...

. . . I have known guys to try and pick up like this and persist in the idea that they got game...

"Are you cold? Why are you shivering?"

"Um, a little"

"Its not that cold. I was in Glasgow a week ago, and that was cold. So you should stop shivering."

"Um" *high pitched nervous laughter*

"What are you studying? I'm studying physics. Although they say that physics is just applied mathematics. What do you think?"

"Oh, I'm not..."

"Well they're wrong..after all mathematics is just applied I.T. these days. Which is strange, because I.T. is just applied biology. So, you live around here? We could go out sometime."

"Um..." *leaps from bus*

Hint: Don't be this guy.
At least that line is better than: “Nice weather we've been having, huh? A little dry lately, though. I hear it's raining cats and dogs in Idaho!”

But not much.
 
^If I may interject with a woman's perspective....

I have many guy friends, and I have seen them try their "come hither stare" on females, only to be baffled as to why it does not work.

What a lot of guys don't realize is that there's a fine line between the passionate stare of a potential lover and the psychotic glare of a guy who plans to drag you off into the woods.

Most guys' "Hey, baby" body language is a little too similar to that of a cheetah spotting a wounded gazelle.


Loosen your shoulders. Smile. Lean in while making eye contact but don't STARE.


:guffaw:

I think I love you right now! Thank you for the morning crack-up.

For me, I get the whole "Oh you look angry. What's with the angry look?" when I'm not angry or really thinking of anything at all. Maybe the frown is of concentration as I'm focusing on what's happening behind my eyes... I dunno. People generally aren't slack in the face, there is always some hint of muscle contraction, tightness that may skew your expression one way or another unconsciously. Which is probably why when you are told to relax your face and you do it, you're surprised that you were holding tension in your facial muscles in the first place.
 
People seem to have an unerring ability to subconsciously read your deepest emotional state, and respond to that. During happy states in my life, people seem unusually drawn to me, I get smiles, and above and beyond assistance, and doing most things involving strangers becomes an overall pleasant experience.

However, when I feel a little run-down, the universal response is quite different - I could get argumentativeness, surly expressions, crap service in general. I guess reality is pretty fair, in that in generally responds to your deepest self.

I think there's definitely something to this. How we feel about ourselves is reflected in how we move. If we're feeling positive people will be drawn to us and vice verse.
 
Wouldn't it be nice if we could disregard the illogical and irrelevant practice of reading 'body language' and focus entirely on what the person feels or knows?

I hate those managers who say they'll decide whether or not to hire someone based on the first 15 seconds of body language. Really? How about judging based on their skill set? Abuse of power, much?
 
Body language shouldn't be a standard in itself, but it's certainly useful in understanding people's true feelings and intentions, especially when they are at odds with their words.
 
At the moment, nobody is talking to me because I'm furious with Son's exam results, Man and my work.
It's not just body language but facial expressions (I suppose they're the same) but currently I'm doing a very good K'Ehleyr :klingon:

It's actually quite fun :lol:
 
"...So, you live around here? We could go out sometime."

big mistake by the guy, in this case

he should have said, for example, "let's go out tomorrow night" and not "we could go out sometime." the latter phrase just makes the guy seem indecisive and weak (i.e., not appealing).
 
I don't know what my normal, day-to-day body language conveys, but a few years ago I was in my usual bar one Saturday night, and was chatting with a bartender. He said the reason nobody ever approached me was because I "carry an air of sadness".

Strangely, I think it's kind of a circular process - the reason I'm sad when I'm in there is because nobody ever seems to be interested in me. I see couples together, guys meeting and chatting each other up... and I'm by myself. It's probably one of the main reasons why I've only gone out alone once since my last relationship ended. I still go out from time to time, but only with friends - it's just too depressing to see other guys hooking up and feeling like there must be something wrong with me because nobody ever seems interested. (It doesn't help that I'm about 200 years old in gay years, and as much as I hate to perpetuate stereotypes, if you're not under 25 with a perfect body, you get no attention... at least in Toronto. I don't know what other cities are like in that regard.)

Ironically, I have a very good track record of meeting guys when I make the first move... but I'm ridiculously shy about doing that, mostly because I'm looking for more than what most of them are probably after.
 
he should have said, for example, "let's go out tomorrow night" and not "we could go out sometime." the latter phrase just makes the guy seem indecisive and weak (i.e., not appealing).

It was more his general attitude of overweening arrogance and his inability to let her finish a sentence that was the problem. Also that she was by herself on the bus when he sat down and started to harangue her (effectively penning her in) when there was still many vacant seats around her. She seemed more threatened then flattered, which is probably not what you want your potential date to feel.

Some indecision would have been welcomed by her I think :)

Body langauge gives us the broad strokes of a person's feelings and intentions which can be incredibly useful, although determining employment by applying a scientifically dubious analysis to BL is questionable at best. There are just too many variables, such as a person's cultural background, which may result in different body language 'words' or 'signs' than the ones we expect.

For example, Caucasian people often believe that direct eye contact is a sign of honesty, whereas within certain traditional communities of Australian Aboriginal people, direct eye contact is avoided (particularly with those of higher authority or social standing than yourself) as a sign of respect to the person you are talking to.
 
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