TNG Caption This #173: A little help from my friends

[LeadHead]

It's that time again, ladies and gents! Time for a new TNG Caption Contest, but first our winners from the last round!

First for thinking outside of the box of Flatulence, our winner is:

Troi: "I'm sensing... great... pain. Such... terrible... pain... Captain, have you by any chance sat on your 'nads again?"

Picard: "Gnnngghh! No shit Sherlock!"

Next, for telling the world that working with Data can be hazardous, our winner is:

Picard and Data practice their trust exercises...

and for showing that Worf is in favor of a balanced breakfast, our winner is:

Worf: Must get in there to get those two scoops of rasins!

And for still finding funny places for Bitsy Picard to show up, Our PhotoShop winner is:

BITSY: It's okay, Papa. I still poop my pants sometimes, too.

And now, on the next round!

On with the contest!

 

[LeadHead]

Q: You know since Riker turned me down for being a Q...

Picard: Oh hell NO!

Riker: C'mon, can't you be a brunette just for my birthday?

Data: We've been watching previews for 20 minutes, when does the movie start?

Dorn: This is great! Most of this episode I'm the calm, voice of reason. I hope they make me that for the rest of the series!

 

[Finn]

Q: About Bitsy... Vash's kid..right?

Riker:

Data: Um.Tasha...Why did you cross your legs? I liked how you played Mozart with that little violin.

(offscreen) Riker smirks as he steps off the turbolift

Data: I think I have a thing for security officers

Worf: Thank Kahless I'm not one

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Picard: "Alright, Q, you've made your point! Chang and Eng did have it pretty rough! Now, if you don't mind..."

Riker: "Don't take that attitude with me! Don't forget, I've got Pulaski's number on speed dial!"

Data: "Mr. Worf, I can see your reflection in the viewscreen...and I would appreciate it if you would stop making that jerking-off motion whenever I'm explaining something to the captain."

Data: "...and this one is called 'Leaning on an Invisible Box.'"
Worf: "I am reminded of an old Klingon saying: 'The only good mime is a dead mime'!"

 

[Isis]

Riker: "Cheer up, Beverly. At least you didn't have twins."

 

[26138]

Q: Is that a phaser in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

 

[Nerys Myk]

Q : I think we might be stuck this way.

RIKER: You actualy paid for that haircut?

DATA: Bridge cleared. Lights dimmed. Barry White on the sound system.

Tasha Yar, please report to the bridge...

DATA: (shakes head) Humans! Am I right right or am I right, Worf ol' buddy?

 

[Boxyno1]

Both: It's multi-racial siamese Captain

Picard: Bite please?

*Q let's him have a bite of his burger*

Q: Mmmm, that's headed right to our joint colon

 

[Alrik]

Q: "Together at last."

Picard: "Together forever."

Q: "We're tying a knot."

Picard: "They never can sever.
I don't need sunshine now to turn my skys at blue."

Q & Picard: "I don't need anything but you."

Crusher (os): "Not bad, but I think the curly red wig would sell it better Q."

 

[Mojochi]

Q: This day has been such fun. Want me to show you the inside of your colon again?

RIKER: C'mon! She said it would bring the three of us closer together. You think she's never noticed you checking her out in the gym? She's an empath

 

[Herkimer Jitty]

Q: "Congratulations, Jean Luc! We're going to guest-star on Voyager!"

Riker: "You're under arrest for that god-awful episode with that ghost in the stupid lantern."

Computer: "WARNING! LIFE SUPPORT FAILURE IN 30 SECONDS."

Data: "Okeydoke. Won't push that button again."

Worf: "I swear, if there are wacky hijinks going on behind me..."

 

[Smellincoffee]

Oh, come, Jean Luc! Tell me I'm your Number One!

Remember. Not a word about my prostate exam to ANYONE.

 

[FormerLurker]

Picard(thinking)Damn. He went there.

Riker: I won't tell if you won't.

Worf: (sees Data reflected in viewer, thinking)Is he using me as his shelf for balancing?

 

[Rat Boy]

Q: "Someone needs a hug."

Picard: "And someone needs to learn a lesson about personal space!"

Riker: "Look, I know what you and Odan were doing with my body. You owe me!"

Data: "Initiating romance program Delta Six."

*disco globe descends, Marvin Gaye's "Let's Get It On" starts playing*

Worf: "You do know that Klingons hate mimes more than tribbles, don't you?"

 

[Subcommander R.]

Picard: He has a third hand on my ass...

Riker: So then you jump out of the cake and- what? Its Picard's birthday, come on.

Data: But why would it take three Ferengi to replace a lighting unit?

Worf: God. I think he's river dancing behind me again.

 

[Mojochi]

Tactical: Why do we have to shut off all the damn lights on night shift anyway? It's fucking demeaning.

Worf: It's time I faced the truth. There is no place for me in Sto'Vo'Kor

 

[cooleddie74]

DATA: Curious.

The power went offline just as Commander Riker began mentioning a "jewel heist."

WORF: Don't lean on the chair, sir.

It took me DAYS to get this thing adjusted to the right comfort position.

 

[cooleddie74]

Q: Just because my kind is omnipotent doesn't mean we don't see the good value of SWINGING BOTH WAYS.

Come here, Jean-Luc.

Gimme some sugar.

WILL: Come on, Beverly.

Give me just FIFTEEN minutes.


I'll show you things Jack never even THOUGHT of doing!!

 

[Isis]

Picard: "I thought you said you got us a double date with two Vorta, not two Horta."

Data: "Where's the lensflare when you need it?"

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

"If you say 'croissant' ONE MORE TIME, I break an arm."