Star Trek XI Caption Contest #17: Busted

[Rat Boy]

Well, everything's back to normal, so it's time for another caption contest. First, let's maybe throw up on...

Our three winners made me wonder if we shouldn't ride to the Enterprise. It is a silly place...

Kirk: "Wow, look at that. It's the Enterprise!"
McCoy: "It's only a model."

Other cadet: "SSHH!!"

Kirk: Cadets, I bid you welcome to your new home. Let us ride to The Enterprise!

And for moving on, our winner is...

SPOCK: What were you doing in Perrin's quarters?

SAREK: I've moved on Spock...

SPOCK: It's been ten minutes!!!!!

And for not heeding sound advice, our winner is...

KIRK: "I told you this would happen to you if you kept going to Exotica to see Naked Mandy in her schoolgirl outfit, but you wouldn't listen to me."

PIKE: "It was worth it."

And our Photoshop winner hopefully puts a certain fad to bed once and for all...

"Congratulations, Captain. Your father would be–"

"BZZZZZZZZTHTHTHTHBTHTHZZZZZZZBZZZZZZZZTHTHTHTHBTHTHZZZZZZZ
BZZZZZZZZTHTHTHTHBTHTHZZZZZZZBZZZZZZZZTHTHTHTHBTHTHZZZZZZZ
BZZZZZZZZTHTHTHTHBTHTHZZZZZZZBZZZZZZZZTHTHTHTHBTHTHZZZZZZZ...."

"...This is worse than those Goddamn sombreros."

Congratulations to the winners. Since we're running behind, no time for the set-up. See you all in three weeks-ish:

 

[Rat Boy]

Cop: "Did you download that song legally?"

Kirk: "Uh oh."

Proctor: "Gaila, why are there naked pictures of Cadet Kirk on your station?"

Gaila (off camera): "Uh oh."

Kirk: "Well, I suppose we could always abandon ship."

Spock: "You used the only escape pod."

Scotty: "Uh oh."

Uncontrollable Diarrhea McCoy (off camera): "UH OH!"

 

[Captain Crow]

Kirk: You must have lots of money because there's no way those tiny things could satisfy Uhura.

 

[bullethead]

Robocop: YOU! RIDICULOUS BLOND CHILD! PULL OVER RIGHT NOW!
Kirk: You mad?
Robocop: WHAT? (smashes into a random pole in the middle of nowhere)
Kirk: That was... weird.

Proctor: Some kid is mouthing off about how awesome he is...
Technician: So?
Proctor: We need someone to kick his ass. No one beats the Kobayashi Maru... ever! MUWAHAHAHA!
Technician: Fuck my life.

Kirk: I'm sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of how awesome I am.
Spock: Your attempts to incite an emotional reaction are childish and immature.
Kirk: I had sex with Uhura last night.
Spock: I'M GOING TO KILL YOU (starts strangling Kirk)

 

[LeadHead]

Cop: Fear me! I can fly!
Kirk: You're not flying, you're on the back of a Semi!
Cop: Don't change the subject.

Proctor: How did that kid beat your test?

Spock: He used the cheat codes. Kirk doesn't care about achievement points.

Kirk: I was so sure I'd win the staring contest.

Sarek: Well, we Vulcans have an inner eyelid-

Spock: Silence Father!

 

[Nerys Myk]

COP: Didnt I see you with my daughter last night?

KIRK: Maybe I date a lot of cop's daughters...

wait, that didn't come out right.

SPOCK: We found the bones of a small canine.....

SCOTTY: Wasn't me!!!!!

 

[Aragorn]

"You! You ARE dangerous. You can be my wingman anytime!"

Being the only one there dressed in black and constantly looking around with shifty eyes wasn't the most inconspicuous way for Charlie to walk out of there with the Starfleet plans he intended to sell to the Klingons.

Scotty tried as hard as he could to ignore that Spock forgot to put on his pants that day. Kirk, on the other hand, simply gave in.

 

[Nerys Myk]

PROCTOR: The simulation is canceled. This bridge is not canon!!!!

 

[LeadHead]

Kirk: Anything else?

Proctor: Load the new "Xindi/Romulans/Tholians Really Angry" Expansion Pack.

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Kirk: "Man-boobs? At your age? That doesn't bode too well for your future, does it."

 

[M'Sharak]

"I can't stand it! I know you planned it!"

"How did he get an apple in here, huh?! I've been all over this damn building and the closest thing to food I
ever found was in the sub-sub-basement in a broken vending machine. Flippin' thing was filled with nothin'
but packs of stale Cheetos, too, and here's this smartass punk, taunting me with fresh fruit?!"

Scotty tried as hard as he could to ignore that Spock forgot to put on his pants that day. Kirk, on the other hand, simply gave in.

 

[LeadHead]

"I can't stand it! I know you planned it!"

Cop: Be careful, I heard the car might have been Sabotaged.

 

[Sanji Himura]

Cop: Kirk.... I am your Fath...

(cop hits a telephone pole)

Cop: Damn you 20th Century Foxxxxx!

Proctor: How did that kid manage to sneak in fresh fruit?

Spock(off screen): I don't know

[last night]

Unknown woman: Oh, baby. Give me some of that fresh fruit...

Kirk: Well, I don't know, Captain... Oh my god, put on some pants.

Spock: I'll have you know that this is the traditional vulcan dress for someone in mourning.

 

[Skywalker]

Thanks for the co-win!

Kirk: Well, I don't know, Captain... Oh my god, put on some pants.

Spock: I'll have you know that this is the traditional vulcan dress for someone in mourning.

Scotty: "So, on Vulcan, it's full mast for mourning, then?"

 

[LeadHead]

Proctor: How did that kid sneak in an apple?

Spock: He brought it in his lunchbox. He had fruit roll ups and a juice box too.

 

[Nerys Myk]

 

[Rat Boy]

Proctor: "How did that kid sneak in an apple?"

Gaila: "From the Craft Services table, you twit."

 

[Captain Crow]

Kirk: Pardon me, would you have any Grey Poupon?

 

[Nerys Myk]

PICARD: That poor kid, doesn't he know including a car chase scene in a Trek movie is the kiss of death?

 

[cooleddie74]

HOVERCOP: Dammit, Mister Gibson!!

ENOUGH drunken racist and anti-Semitic remarks!! Step out of the vehicle...and Put your hands behind your back !!

(Whispering to self)

I'm almost Reg Barclay...

I'm almost Reg Barclay...

KIRK: You expect to command a starship THIS large and advanced with a penis THAT tiny?

You're out of your league, Spock.

Step aside.