TNG Caption This #170 Under New Management

[LeadHead]

Hello all, at present time it appears that Canuck69 is no longer posting regularly at the BBS, with Holdfast's permission, I will now be running the TNG Caption This.

The new way we'll be doing things, I'll aim to keep this weekly. Right now, it'll be Tuesday-Tuesday. We're getting an early start this week, this contest will run through next Tuesday.

Since the last contest went on a long time, each picture has 2 winners!

First up, for showing that Worf has always been popular with the ladies:

Worf: "I'm really sorry, man. I know you have a major crush on Christie Henshaw, but what could I do? She wouldn't take 'no' for an answer! Look, if it makes you feel any better, she really wasn't all that great in the sack."

And for reminding us all that Ten Forward insists on cleanliness:

WORF: By the way, that's Windex. Guinan uses it to clean the bar.

For Coming In Too Fast Striker:

Riker: Looks like I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue!

For proving that some sentiments can cross over between TV Series:

Riker: "Beverly... it's working. I've had a vision, about the future. I can see it so clearly. I'm gonna kill Worf. I'm gonna kill Worf. That's what I'm gonna do. I can see it clearly now, I'm going to kill... him... Kill Worf... Kill Worf."

And the ever important PhotoShop Award:

And now, how bout some new Pictures to Caption?

 

[LeadHead]

Picard: To Captain Jean-Luc Picard, Stardate 46342.3 You are hereby requested and required to give your ship to Jellico so that The TrekBBS can debate on whether or not he was a good Captain or not.

Worf: (over comm) Worf to Riker, he's almost back, get outta there!

It was rough for Data, having to stand in for the ships computer every time someone downloaded Spyware.

 

[DGCatAniSiri]

Riker: Guess that's one way to get ahead, huh Data?
Data: Commander, that joke was not funny the previous 4,945 times you told it, it is not funny now.

 

[Nerys Myk]

STEWART: "Apple's Way"?

COX: A gig's a gig.

RIKER: Deanna, you ever see "Basic Instinct"?

PICARD: Not quite what I had in mind when I requested a little head in my ready room.

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Picard: "And now presenting..." to Jellico "Are you sure this is safe?"
Jellico: "Look it's been 200 years, I'm sure they've ironed out the bugs."
Picard: "Hmm, still, I think it's better if Wesley conducts the demonstration... And now presenting the future of law enforcement, ED 2009!"

Riker mumbling: "I know there's no such regulation. I know it. 375-A-Baker, The first officer's secondary role as Captain's seat warmer can be invoked at the Captain's discretion. That has to be bull."
Jellico on intercom "37.5 Celsius, Commander. I'm bringing a thermometer to make sure."
Riker: "Shit!"

Data: "Lieutenant, I apologise for trying to choke you with a rolled up magazine. Could you please reattach... Lieutenant? What are you doing with that phaser? Lieutenant Ripley?"

 

[Isis]

Picard: "Somehow, I don't feel I'm the right choice to sing 'I Feel Pretty.'"

Data: "This should work out OK. It's not like they're gonna use my head for batting practice."

Ted Williams (OS): "I wouldn't be so sure about that."

 

[Holdfast]

Great to see the thread up & running again! If you find weekly too short a time to get lots of entries, you might find that every 2 weeks works better. I leave it entirely up to you!

<Data thinking> No-one will ever love me; I'm always the one left on the shelf. </Data thinking>

 

[Isis]

Data realized only too late that when Captain Picard said "Heads will roll," he meant it.

 

[Celcius]

Data: I wonder which button I should press

 

[Subcommander R.]

PUT ME IN DETENTION? Damn you Picard...

 

[Rat Boy]

Picard: "It's a note from someone named Mr. Quaid. It says, 'GIVE DEEZ PEOPLE AIR!'"

*fart*

Riker: "Heh, heh. Couple more of these and even Data won't be able to breathe in here."

Data (singing): "Ain't got no body..."

Jellico: "And just how in the hell did you get here?"

Cloud William: "Always in episodes with guest captains who are dicks. In contract."

 

[Mojochi]

Picard: Dear Jean-Luc, don't worry if I fall asleep before you finish. I'll be up in time to piss everyone off
​

Love, Capt. Edward Jellico, Commanding U.S.S. Enterprise

Riker: *Sigh* Why must you haunt my every waking moment, image of naked Q?

Galaxy Class prototype design for the new standard ship's blender, just insert ingredients

 

[LeadHead]

Picard: Will the owner of Blue Type 6 Shuttlecraft, registry; NCC 1701-D, please report to Shuttebay 2, your phasers are on.

 

[Nerys Myk]

PICARD (reading): "101 Ways To Withstand Cardassian Torture". Thanks Captain, but I can't see how I'd need this.

 

[Mistral]

Picard: "...and so we lay to rest Chuckles the Clown."

Jellico: (thinking) "I won't laugh, I mustn't laugh..."

 

[Mistral]

Norman Bates's secret-revealed!

 

[Nerys Myk]

PICARD: Owlnight-Sechs, Party of five. The Owlnight-Sech Party...

JELLICO: chuckles

PICARD: I hate you.

 

[LeadHead]

Picard: This was just handed to me by Captain Jellico. Amanda HugandKiss, please come up here. Amanda HugandKiss? We need Amanda HugandKiss!

 

[Locutus of Board]

Picard: Why is it called an iPad?
Jellico: I wish iknew

Thinking: The chair, the room, the lionfish and the iPad,. What do I have? The beard.

Thinking: The chair, the room, the lionfish and the iPad. At least Riker has a beard. What do I have? A head.

 

[Skywalker]

Spiner: "Why the hell am I stuck in the janitor's closet when Frakes gets the front goddamn row?! This future sucks!"