Star Trek XI Caption Contest #1: Shakedown Cruise

[Shatmandu]

Young Kirk: "How'd I get so fat?"

 

[Rat Boy]

Fanboy: "And why do you have blue eyes?!"

 

[Shatmandu]

Pine, thinking: "Note to self: don't take the last cruller when Nimoy's on set."

 

[Rat Boy]

Pine: "Really? Naked models?"

Nimoy: "Oh, trust me, you'll like them."

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Pine: "Jesus, Wheaton, there's no use bein' pissed at me! I mean, you as Kirk? That was never gonna happen!"


And, inspired by Rat Boy's entry above...

Pine: "I gotta admit, photographing nude chicks? Kewl hobby! But...why do you keep your studio so cold?"

Nimoy: "*sigh* You're not exactly the brightest bulb in the box, are ya, kid."

 

[Rat Boy]

Pine: "Dude, what's up with the get-up?"

Nimoy: "Never been to a convention before, have you?"

Fanboy: "And why does the Enterprise sound like a Cylon raider when she flies by?!"

Pine: "It...wasn't me...it...was Ben Burtt!"

 

[Shatmandu]

Spock: "Uhura? Yes, I would engage in sexual intercourse with her, if the opportunity arose."

Pine: "You play your cards right, prove yourself, I'll get you a guest shot on the next CHiPs reunion TV movie."

 

[Candlelight]

Kirk: "Lets go, this place is dead"
Spock: "I've been to dead before"

Austin Powers: "WHY-WON'T-THIS-WIG-COME-OFF?!?"

 

[Trekker4747]

Kirk: Joe kind of picked some lame screen-grabs for this contest, didn't he?
Spock: Yep. He is most illogical.

Attacker: Why you choking yourself? Huh? Why you choking yourself?

 

[scottydog]

Kirk: "Really? Your Uhura has huge hooters? Mine is flatter than the state of Iowa."

Spock: "But remember that huge ravine in Iowa? Both Uhuras have that."

 

[Nerys Myk]

KIRK: The Kermit snowsuit?

SPOCK: A gift from my mother.

 

[Rat Boy]

KIRK: The Kermit snowsuit?

Spock: "I come from a friggin' desert planet! Fuck, the tips of my ears felt like they were going to snap off in the San Francisco fog."

 

[Trekker4747]

Kirk: So is Chekov just as annoying in your universe as he is mine?

Spock: Unfortuanly he's worse. Mine has Davy Jones' hair.

 

[Rat Boy]

Nero: "James T. Kirk was a great man...but he didn't have blue eyes!"

 

[Skywalker]

KIRK: The Kermit snowsuit?

Spock: "It's not easy being green-blooded."
Kirk:"Oh, gee, that's brilliant, Spock. Did Orci come up with that little zinger?"

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Kirk: The chicken! You're supposed to choke the chicken, not my neck!

 

[Candlelight]

"Pac Man hoodie? Seriously?"
"I'm an old man. Things you think are cool may not appear to be to the younger audience. Now, help me with my copy of Windows Vista"
"Man your universe was seriously flawed"

 

[scottydog]

KIRK: The Kermit snowsuit?

SPOCK: A gift from my mother.

Kirk: "No wonder you let her die on Vulcan."

 

[Shatmandu]

A combo platter:

Kirk: "This time at the urinals, keep your eyes on your own prize, unkay?"

Kirk: "FINE .... YOU ... CAN ... WATCH ... ME ... PEE ..."

 

[scottydog]

Spock: "This long cold tunnel reminds me of pon farr with T'Frigid."

Kirk: "Uncle! Uncle!"

Attacker: "Giving up, eh?"

Kirk: "No... <gasp> just wanted to tell you... <gasp> I enjoyed driving your car ... into the Iowa Grand Canyon, Uncle."