Facts About Captain Robau

[Islander]

Robau can kill two stones with one bird.

 

[Nick Ryder]

And you wouldn't want Robau to give you... the BIRD. :SHOCK: You may really... ahem... yourself!

 

[Voyagerian]

The Kelvin doesn't need shields. Robau's awesome presence is protection enough.

 

[Trekker56]

Faran Tahir's latest interview:

http://insidemovies.moviefone.com/2009/11/17/faran-tahir-star-trek-iron-man-interview/

 

[6079SmithW]

Captain Robau has such badass willpower that he can watch "two girls and a cup" without even flinching.

 

[Islander]

Who do you think was holding the camera?

 

[cooleddie74]

Robau filmed the JFK assassination like Abraham Zapruder but ROBAU caught the real killers on camera.

 

[Hartzilla2007]

Robau filmed the JFK assassination like Abraham Zapruder but ROBAU caught the real killers on camera.

And then he destroyed them.

 

[cooleddie74]

Robau filmed the JFK assassination like Abraham Zapruder but ROBAU caught the real killers on camera.

And then he destroyed them.

By strangling them to death with yards and yards of undeveloped 8mm celluloid film.

 

[6079SmithW]

On page 5 of the "Star Trek" novel it says, "Captain Pierre Robau..." WTF?! His first name is Richard. Are they implying that Captain Badass Motherfrakking Robau is a descendant of French wussies? How dare they! Robau will track down every copy of this book and glare at it until it bursts into flames.

 

[cooleddie74]

Robau used time travel and eliminated the initial first-draft copies of the TREK script from existence after finding out he was initially called "Pierre."

 

[Jon1701]

Captain Robau doesn't need a digital copy.

 

[Yeoman Randi]

Nor does he need any "stinkin' badges"

 

[Islander]

Robau's cellphone minutes carry over the next month even when he does use them all.

 

[6079SmithW]

Captain Robau's boots are "one size fits all." This refers to the fact that after he is done kicking your ass his boot is lodged in it not matter what size or shape your ass is.

 

[Klingon Empire]

I'll bet Robau doesn't have a Sombrero Klingon!

 

[6079SmithW]

Fool! Do you know how Klingons got their hideously mangled foreheads? Robau personally headbutted each one of those bastards, causing their skulls to deform. Robau's head was unscathed, naturally, because it is bald and badass, unlike Klingons.

 

[Klingon Empire]

So True.

The Narada turned tail and ran at the sight of Robau.

 

[6079SmithW]

But Robau caught up to it, breached the hull with his bare hands, and then pummeled Nero until he was reduced to child-like whimpering. Robau then ORDERED Nero to attack the Kelvin and "kill" him so that the plot could continue.

 

[Islander]

But Robau caught up to it, breached the hull with his bare hands, and then pummeled Nero until he was reduced to child-like whimpering. Robau then ORDERED Nero to attack the Kelvin and "kill" him so that the plot could continue.

That, somehow, still took 246 takes.