Children in Restaurants.

[Jan]

The instinct to "protect and nurture our young", IMO, doesn't really come out until you actually have kids yourself.

I have a feeling that's true. When I was of childbearing age and would tell people that I didn't want children I was told over and over (mostly by other women) how my feelings would change once I had my own. I'd get horrified looks when I told them that I didn't *want* my feelings to change.

I wonder just how strong the imperrative really would still be to 'save the women and children first' the way things used to be. It's not as if the human species is going to be endangered if they're not given special protection, after all.

Jan

 

[sidious618]

Why is it that one someone says they find kids irritating or that they don't particularly like them people react as if they just threatened to burn down a church?

Genetic human nature to protect and nurture our young. It's in our DNA.

I eat my young. I'm doing it wrong, aren't I?

 

[JonathonWally]

Why is it that one someone says they find kids irritating or that they don't particularly like them people react as if they just threatened to burn down a church?

Genetic human nature to protect and nurture our young. It's in our DNA.

I eat my young. I'm doing it wrong, aren't I?

Saves a trip to the restaurant.

 

[Miss Chicken]

You know if I went to Chuck-E-Cheese's or someplace that caters to kids, I'd have no room to bitch and I wouldn't. That said, what difference does it make where I dine or what they serve? A restaurant is a place to sit down, eat, and enjoy the company of your companions. I'm sure that even the "family friendly" establishment doesn't include: annoying the fuck out of everyone around your table in the definition. And if they do, let me know so I NEVER go there.

If some parents can't be bothered to teach their kids boundaries, manners and social skills, then they don't deserve to eat outside of their homes. Ever. Being "curious" and "a kid" doesn't excuse inappropriate behavior in public or, give parents a pass on not taking responsibility for their offspring.

I do not expect two year olds to have the same manners that one would expect from a 6 year old, or a 10 year old. A two year old is barely more than a baby and it isn't easy to explain manners to them, yet alone expect them to have come anywhere near close to mastering them.

A two year old staring at you should not be an annoyance and I doubt it is to most people.

And I expect to see two year old at 'burger joints' and all though this thread I have stated that I am only talking about burger joints and child-friendly pubs (which I don't think are common in the USA).

WTF? Are you deliberately trying to misunderstand what I'm saying? I'm not talking about a two-year old, who should be seated in a high chair or booster seat anyway, or a kid looking around the restaurant, like any normal person is going to do. I'm talking about a specific set of behaviors that will ruin my dining experience. I know you're not stupid, so stop acting like it. My position on this topic has been made perfectly clear. Accept it or not, but I'm not going to continue to debate this with you.

You haven't been paying attention to the thread.

Elephants graveyard made a comment

My apologies if you've ever been looked at by a two year old in a burger joint. I do let my son climb up and look around, hadn't realised it was that annoying.

to which I answered

If a two-year old was looking at me at a burger joint I would play peek-a-boo with him.

You then quoted both EG's and mine comments. You said

Elephants Graveyard: I hope you never allow your son to annoy someone who doesn't take kindly to that sort of thing.

Miss N Thrope: When I'm in a restaurant, I want to enjoy my meal, whether it's a burger or prime rib, not entertain (or be annoyed by) someone else's rugrat.

From that we, and I think it was understandable that we did, took it that you didn't like being stared at by a two year old. You specifically used the term rugrat - a word that is applied to children who is at the crawling or todding age.

At no time in this thread have I been talking about a child who isn't a toddler, or a child who isn't in a burger joint (or family restaurant).

Also Elephants Graveyard was referring to her 2 year old's behaviour and you commented directly on it.

EDITED TO ADD - BTW many two year olds are too big to put into a highchair and I have never seen a booster seat at a burger joint.

 

[LeahBoBo]

The ignorant fuckers that allow their offspring to stand up in the seat and peer over the booth at the diners behind them. That is the height of rudeness and inconsideration. I will not tolerate that, and all hell will break loose if said ignorant parents don't nip that in the bud STAT. Since I am not a kid friendly person in the first place, I immediately inform the host or hostess that I do not want to be seated near any kids. It's better and safer for everyone.

My apologies if you've ever been looked at by a two year old in a burger joint. I do let my son climb up and look around, hadn't realised it was that annoying.

I've reprinted this for your enlightenment, it includes my first post on this topic, to which EG responded and brought in her bit about two-year-olds and burger joints. At no point did I ever run with that scenario, and I can't help it that you two did. It was a bad assumption on your part to think (1) I was talking about toddlers because you were, and (2) think that rugrat only applies to toddlers. All kids under the age of 13 are rugrats to me.

EDITED TO ADD - BTW many two year olds are too big to put into a highchair and I have never seen a booster seat at a burger joint.

Please, please, please give it a rest. I DON'T CARE.

 

[Miss Chicken]

How come after EGs first comment and my reply to her didn't you make it plain that you weren't speaking about children as young as her son? One such comment early on by you would have stopped any confusion.

Definitions of a rugrat (from three different sources)

Small child, usually still at the crawling stage.

a child not yet old enough for school

a very young child especially one that has started to crawl

If you use a definition of the word that is nowhere near its true meaning you shouldn't be surprised if other people get confused.

 

[LeahBoBo]

How come after EGs first comment and my reply to her didn't you make it plain that you weren't speaking about children as young as her son? One such comment early on by you would have stopped any confusion.

It's not my responsibility to correct projecting. If you didn't understand what I was talking about, either one or both of you could have asked instead of assuming we were on the same page.

 

[Miss Chicken]

How come after EGs first comment and my reply to her didn't you make it plain that you weren't speaking about children as young as her son? One such comment early on by you would have stopped any confusion.

It's not my responsibility to correct projecting. If you didn't understand what I was talking about, either one or both of you could have asked instead of assuming we were on the same page.

If you are not willing to correct projecting don't bitch when people continue to misunderstand you meaning,

 

[LeahBoBo]

How come after EGs first comment and my reply to her didn't you make it plain that you weren't speaking about children as young as her son? One such comment early on by you would have stopped any confusion.

It's not my responsibility to correct projecting. If you didn't understand what I was talking about, either one or both of you could have asked instead of assuming we were on the same page.

If you are not willing to correct projecting don't bitch when people continue to misunderstand you meaning,

(1) I'll bitch about whatever I want, whenever I want. It's a woman's perogative. Deal.
(2) Projecting. The cause for a lot of the world's problems. You might want to rethink that.

 

[LeahBoBo]

How come after EGs first comment and my reply to her didn't you make it plain that you weren't speaking about children as young as her son?

Because I was never talking about children as young as her son. The thought never crossed my mind. Sorry, but I'm not kid-focused or myopic on the subject of kids. She introduced that particular. I didn't. You ran with it and kept on running with it because I think you like to see yourself in print.

One such comment early on by you would have stopped any confusion.

You were confused because you wanted to be. If you had read my original post, you might have had a better understanding. Otherwise, it's your responsibility to ask, not assume.

Definitions of a rugrat (from three different sources)

Small child, usually still at the crawling stage.

a child not yet old enough for school

a very young child especially one that has started to crawl

If you use a definition of the word that is nowhere near its true meaning you shouldn't be surprised if other people get confused.

Thanks for the tip. Now you have a 4th definition. Mine.

 

[Ward Fowler]

Why is it that one someone says they find kids irritating or that they don't particularly like them people react as if they just threatened to burn down a church?

Genetic human nature to protect and nurture our young. It's in our DNA.

I eat my young. I'm doing it wrong, aren't I?

Only if you're disemboweling them first.

 

[Tulin]

Here's the solution.

The next time a snotty nosed little bastard starts peering through the bars or partitions, get up REALLY close and start doing the same thing back. Play peek-a-boo REALLY close and peer over the top of the chair at the family, as well.

See how long that goes on for before THEY move or register THEIR discomfort.

Little fuckers.

 

[Tulin]

Maybe some of you should try to be more like my Grandpa Ken and smile at a little kid looking out at his world.

Your grandfather lived in a different world.

These days the bitch of a mother would probably scream "PEDAPHILE!!!!!!!"

And no, I am NOT joking.


The world is FUCKED up.

 

[Tulin]

Why is it that one someone says they find kids irritating or that they don't particularly like them people react as if they just threatened to burn down a church?

Genetic human nature to protect and nurture our young. It's in our DNA.

People who find kids irritating or don't particularly like them kind of defeat your argument.

I don't "hate" kids.

I don't like to be around annoying, obnoxious, indulged children, however.

My neice and nephew are cases in point. They are bratty, indulged, spoiled little shits. I don't want to be around them and will avoid family gatherings largely because of this. What makes the situation more puzzling is that neither of us were raised to get our own way all the time and when we were out in public we were quiet and well behaved(mum told us on numerous occassions she got compliments).

I cannot understand why my sister has raised two children so opposite to how she was reared.

 

[Nerys Ghemor]

Tulin, you should use the multiquote function if you need to answer more than one person at the same time--the mods get pretty strict about people doing multiple posts in a row like that. Just push "multiquote" on each post you want to reply to, and then "quote" on the last post, and it ought to work.

 

[Tulin]

Actually, if you check the times I posted they are all several minutes apart. They are three separate posts for a reason and that is, I replied as I was reading through the thread. As for the multiple posts, I understood(unless this has changed)that you can post a maximum of three posts in a row before it becomes an issue. I post in this fashion because I don't trust my memory to go back and actually find the offending posts I wish to reply to.

Thank you for your concern but I have been on here since 2001 and am aware of the protocols.

 

[Alpinemaps]

My neice and nephew are cases in point. They are bratty, indulged, spoiled little shits. I don't want to be around them and will avoid family gatherings largely because of this. What makes the situation more puzzling is that neither of us were raised to get our own way all the time and when we were out in public we were quiet and well behaved(mum told us on numerous occassions she got compliments).

I cannot understand why my sister has raised two children so opposite to how she was reared.

I'd swear you were me posting about my sister. Because my niece and nephew could be described the same way, and my sister and I were not raised like that either. Weird.

Well, I have a 20 month old. Any 9 times out of 10, she is fantastic at a restaurant. She's very quiet, we entertain and engage her, and we make sure that she behaves appropriately.

Recently, though, we stopped by a Red Robin (a family sit down restaurant) for dinner. Little Miss Alpinemaps saw a balloon, and became desperate for it, as soon as we walked it. We immediately asked to be seated on the patio (to not disturb the inside patrons - there was only one another family on the patio), and they obliged (and got us a balloon quickly).

We were sitting down for about 2 minutes - long enough for the waitress to take our order - when LMA saw the balloon that the other toddler had, on the other side of the patio. She became desperate for that one, too. Mrs. Alpinemaps and I looked at each other, I grabbed LMA, and I left the restaurant. Mrs. Alpinemaps tracked down our waitress, and asked her to change it to a to-go order. We ate dinner at home that night (and yes, we tipped the waitress as if we had eaten there).

We didn't want to subject everyone else to our child not having a good day. So that's why we took off.

There are lots of rude people on both sides of the equation - parents that ignore their kids (letting them scream for example) and adults who can't just relax (kid staring at them, etc).

 

[May 20]

You did the right thing, AM. And you've already established a foundation for public behavior -- control yourself or we will leave. It's a good lesson for a little one to learn.

OT -- Your baby is already 20 months old?!? Good grief, that doesn't seem possible.

 

[Flibble]

I went to a restaurant on Sunday for lunch, which was quite upmarket, and I was amazed to see a little girl on her scooter in the restaurant whizzing about without a care in the world. Her even smaller sister was trying to reach up to the counter where the staff were collecting the meals from on very hot plates. The parents of these two kids were not paying attention to them at all, just drinking their wine. If one of the kids had caused an accident, I am sure that the parents would have been blaming the restaurant staff, rather than their own inadequate parenting skills. JMHO!

 

[Tulin]

I HATE those kinds of parents - the ones who think everybody else should be their demon spawn's unpaid babysitter, while they sit and wile away the evening.

As you said - these are the same oxygen thieves who will then turn around and sue the establishment.