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Jayson

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I want to see who does the best job of being me. I want see if someone can capture my wierd thoughts, my horniness that leads to bad decesion making. Not to mention my inhumane amount of typo's. But also my kindness and my ability to be respectful to all.

JAson
 
I was aroused by a monkey. I followed her home, but she just wants to be friends.


That's a good headline but you got to make the complete thread. :) Plus it's kind of unrealistc in that a monkey couldn't find it's way home, nor do I think a stray monkey would be out on the streets. Don't forget that I never lie. Everything I say I do is the truth. Sometimes I will bring up intresting scenario's in a "What if" type of way but when I talk about myself it's always the truth.

Jason
 
Title--A Girl just sneezed and the expelled snot formed my name. Is it love?

Body--It most definitely is love, or else why would she have sneezed? But even though I know she loves me, I still don't have the cajones to ask her out....

Any thoughts?
 
Topic: Sentient Monkey Girl Who Sneezes In My Direction Claims I Gave Her Herpes.


Message: For the past two weeks I've been ultra-horny. So horny in fact I've got blisters hand but that's not important. There is this girl in the lab I work at who is half human and half monkey. Every day I walk past her cage and she sneezes at me. I was thinking about doing her but she wants to be friends first. Whatever. Now she's claiming that I gave her herpes, which is totally untrue, I injected her with swine flu. Right now she's threatening to take me to court over this, which I find strangely arousing. What should I do?
 
Ive been looking in my hot neighbours bans, and ive noticed she has photos of me, and has attached my face to pictures of girls wearing pink dresses.

I think I might be in with a shot to finally loose my virginity, plus this suggests she is a sexual deviant, so she might dominate me, force me to wear pink dresses and suck her strap on.
 
Ive been looking in my hot neighbours bans, and ive noticed she has photos of me, and has attached my face to pictures of girls wearing pink dresses.

I think I might be in with a shot to finally loose my virginity, plus this suggests she is a sexual deviant, so she might dominate me, force me to wear pink dresses and suck her strap on.


Pretty acurate! I love how you gotten down my, broken english speak, that happens sometimes because I type to fast and don't pay attention, until after I make a post.

Jason
 
I NEED ATTENTION!!!

Good idea for a thread, but you need to fill it out, more but not to much. If I made this thread I would make the headline "I need Attention" and the thread would then be something like. Give it to me! Any attention will do.


Jason
 
Topic: Sentient Monkey Girl Who Sneezes In My Direction Claims I Gave Her Herpes.


Message: For the past two weeks I've been ultra-horny. So horny in fact I've got blisters hand but that's not important. There is this girl in the lab I work at who is half human and half monkey. Every day I walk past her cage and she sneezes at me. I was thinking about doing her but she wants to be friends first. Whatever. Now she's claiming that I gave her herpes, which is totally untrue, I injected her with swine flu. Right now she's threatening to take me to court over this, which I find strangely arousing. What should I do?

A seintent monkey girl, who has herpes isn't realisitc. Like I said above, I never lie, so I could never make this thread. Remember, even though some of the things I do or say, seem wierd, they are all based in the reality of my life or my mindset.

Jason
 
Jayson, do you use manatees to conjure up thread topics, by the way?

;)

Nope I let my OCD do all the thinking for me! :) You would be amazed at the type of things, can pop into your head, when you alone in a truck and not 100% mentally stable.

Jason
 
Title--A Girl just sneezed and the expelled snot formed my name. Is it love?

Body--It most definitely is love, or else why would she have sneezed? But even though I know she loves me, I still don't have the cajones to ask her out....

Any thoughts?


Pretty acurate, except I would proably go into more detail on why the sneeze, forming my name would make me think it's love.

Jason
 
What If Having Sex with a Monkey Cured Baldness?

I mean you get to be on top if you want. And you could chose a boy or girl monkey, so that would be good. What kind of foreplay would a monkey need? Do you give her a banana when you're done?
 
What If Having Sex with a Monkey Cured Baldness?

I mean you get to be on top if you want. And you could chose a boy or girl monkey, so that would be good. What kind of foreplay would a monkey need? Do you give her a banana when you're done?

Works for the most part,but I have done monkeys so much it's almost a cliche. I am still waiting for inspiration to come up with a monkey thread, that's truly unique. Also I have a thick head of hair, so baldness isn't a issue for me, so i'm not sure if i will even consider that, as the possible problem that monkey sex would cure. this is in essence more of a Jayson thread, crica-2003.

Jason
 
What If Having Sex with a Monkey Cured Baldness?

I mean you get to be on top if you want. And you could chose a boy or girl monkey, so that would be good. What kind of foreplay would a monkey need? Do you give her a banana when you're done?

Works for the most part,but I have done monkeys so much it's almost a cliche. I am still waiting for inspiration to come up with a monkey thread, that's truly unique. Also I have a thick head of hair, so baldness isn't a issue for me, so i'm not sure if i will even consider that, as the possible problem that monkey sex would cure. this is in essence more of a Jayson thread, crica-2003.

Jason

What can I say?

I'm a sucker for the classics.

;)
 
I NEED ATTENTION!!!

Good idea for a thread, but you need to fill it out, more but not to much. If I made this thread I would make the headline "I need Attention" and the thread would then be something like. Give it to me! Any attention will do.


Jason


Hmmm.....the best I can come up with now is:

Thread title: I NEED ATTENTION!!

Post: I feel horny and have been watching a girl down the street and I really want to date her and get laid. I am hoping she's like a dominatrix and not a transexual. I am going out to buy some sex toys so I can be a kinky boy tonight.

What are you guys gonna do when I get laid?


.....it's a quick, rough copy. I can do better, haha.
 
I NEED ATTENTION!!!

Good idea for a thread, but you need to fill it out, more but not to much. If I made this thread I would make the headline "I need Attention" and the thread would then be something like. Give it to me! Any attention will do.


Jason


Hmmm.....the best I can come up with now is:

Thread title: I NEED ATTENTION!!

Post: I feel horny and have been watching a girl down the street and I really want to date her and get laid. I am hoping she's like a dominatrix and not a transexual. I am going out to buy some sex toys so I can be a kinky boy tonight.

What are you guys gonna do when I get laid?


.....it's a quick, rough copy. I can do better, haha.

It works but I would change the part about me buying sex toys. I'm broke right now, and my hope is the girl will already have some. I think I have a dog lease, though and I wonder if I could pass that off as a sex toy. My biggest worry though is if we do female crossdressing, is that I might have to use some of my mom's cloths, since i'm not prepared for crossdressing.

Jason
 
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