VFWCC #22 There's coffee in these captions!

[Lucy of Nine]

Brilliant work as always, you lot! Waaaay too many funny ones this week! I had such trouble deciding (nearly everyone deserved some sort of award this week)... but luckily someone from the future came back through time and polluted the timeline by telling me who I had chosen as winners... phew! Lucky for time travel hey!

Honourable Mentions go to :


Shatmandu! For his:

Janeway: "Seven's here, with that holographic human-shaped vibrator she pals around with."
Tuvok, in a high pitch: "Girl, you soooo catty."

Laughed out loud at Tuvok's voice!

Also, an honourable mention to Unimatrix for this:

Guy behind the Captain: "God, I hate opening night... All the crazy fanatics in their damn costumes... [About Tuvoc] I think I knew that guy from highschool. He's still a loser."

Photoshop Award - Pure brilliance this week!!!! Well done Nerys! Awesome!

TUVOK: You assured me that others would be in costume for this ritual as well.

And this week, I couldn't chose one winner.... so the prize is split two ways... the Astronomical Phase Invariator Quantum Jibber Jabber Spoon goes to both Captain Crow and Nerys Myk, for their efforts!

(gunshot)

Female voice: What happened?

Male voice: I just shot my foot by accident.

(Cheesy music being played on a cheap Casio keyboard)

Tuvok: Captain, I do not understand the humor of a cat playing a keyboard after someone has done something of an idiotic nature.

TUVOK: So it is the dream of all young human females to become a hooker and marry a millionaire who hired her?

JANEWAY: Gee, when you put it that way it kind of loses the romance.

This week's entry... enjoy!

 

[Unimatrix 01]

Brilliant work as always, you lot! Waaaay too many funny ones this week! I had such trouble deciding (nearly everyone deserved some sort of award this week)... but luckily someone from the future came back through time and polluted the timeline by telling me who I had chosen as winners... phew! Lucky for time travel hey!

So much for the Temporal Prime Directive... You must be friends with Janeway Thanks for the Honourable Mention!

 

[Daneel]

Michael Sullivan quickly realized that using coffee-flavoured rings for the game was a big mistake.

 

[Timelord79 (he/him)]

After nearly seven years without a real boyfriend Janeway was delighted to find the only sex toy market of the Delta Quadrant.

 

[Shatmandu]

Shatmandu! For his:

Janeway: "Seven's here, with that holographic human-shaped vibrator she pals around with."
Tuvok, in a high pitch: "Girl, you soooo catty."

Laughed out loud at Tuvok's voice!

That got me, too. Thanks for the honorable mention. Very nice.

Janeway seals her gift to Tuvok for his upcoming Pon Far.

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

DaVinci offscreen: "Where did I put that IUD prototype that I was working on?"

 

[Shatmandu]

Neelix, offscreen: "Captain, not all species' feces looks the same ..."

 

[Rat Boy]

Sullivan: "For Christ's sake, Katie, I'm a hologram. You dinnae need to wear your diaphragm with me."

 

[Mistral]

Janeway: "Ah, Sully, this pretzel seems a bit stale."

Sullivan: "That's not a pretzel, Katie, that's the ringworm I just had removed."

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

DaVinci offscreen: "Some bits are missing from that horse I was dissecting. Katerina, have you seen the sphincter?"

 

[Captain Crow]

Thanks for choosing me as on of the winner Lucy of Nine.

Janeway: I love chocolate rings. (picks up ring)

B'Elanna: Captain, that's not a chocolate ring.

Janeway: Then what is it? (puts ring in mouth)

B'Elanna: It's a used toilet wax ring.

 

[Shatmandu]

Neelix: "So, how do you like the chocolate donut from Thunderdickia IV?"

 

[nil_jones]

Somehow Captain Janeway got the Cinderella story confused as child, mistaking "glass slipper" for "giant cock ring."

 

[Rat Boy]

Some nights, she pretended it was Chakotay. Other nights, a brick, but there's really not that much of a difference.

 

[Nerys Myk]

JANEWAY: This is the only possesion of Mark's I own. (sighs)

 

[Herkimer Jitty]

DaVinci: "Katerina! You were supposed to throw it in the fires of Mount Doom!"

Janeway: "Fuck off dwarf boy."

 

[Captain Crow]

Janeway: This lip ring isn't to noticeable is it?

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Janeway: "Now all I have to do is insert this, and I'll be able to get into all the Sting concerts I want to for free."

 

[Triskelion]

- "Doctor to Captain. One of Seven's borg breast containment rings has gone missing."
- "Keep looking Doctor. Janeway out." This thing will fetch a fortune on eBay!

 

[Lucy of Nine]

hehe I love you guys!