Movie Caption Contest #98: Frustrations

[Shatmandu]

Ru'afo: "What do you mean your Federation governor was missing for a week over Father's Day, was supposedly hiking, but was really in Argentina?"

 

[Diesel Micky Dolenz]

Ru'afo: "Captain, why do I get the feeling that I don't have your full attention?"

Picard: "I have no idea." <types: "LOL. Son'a dickbag thinks he's the shit.">

 

[Triskelion]

Ru'afo: So, you guys wanna start a gang or what?
Picard: Yeah, the Dixon Hill Gang.
Dougherty: I like the Doughboys?
Ru'afo: Whatever, I just wanna wear Members-Only jackets.

Kirk: Spock, by now the whole crew knows about Vulcan Fart Ventriloquism.

 

[Turd Ferguson]

"I read your Tweet, Captain. I found your comment about how my face looks like the Borg Queen's vagina to be quite hurtful."

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Picard: I'm sorry. But you just reminded me that I have to manscape my balls this afternoon.

Wes Craven presents A Nightmare on The Enterprise.

 

[Shatmandu]

Picard: "Oh, how threatening. All the best villains have a paunch. <turns> And you, Admiral, why are you wearing a trucker belt buckle?"

 

[Alrik]

Ru'afo: "A little too much?"

Picard: "No, not yet. You still have a ways to go to catch up with Joan Rivers."

 

[Shatmandu]

The 'F' in F. Murray Abraham stand for 'Fudge.'"

 

[Shatmandu]

Scotty, offscreen: "I just wanna know who keeps pooping in the locker room shower, is all."

 

[Rat Boy]

Scotty, offscreen: "I just wanna know who keeps pooping in the locker room shower, is all."

Play her off, Keyboard Kzinti.

 

[Shatmandu]

Mark Sanford, on speaker: "We met eight years ago, and exchanged e-mails ..."

 

[Rat Boy]

Mark Sanford, on speaker: "We met eight years ago, and exchanged e-mails ..."

Never fails that Shatmandu is always the first to chime in on a gubernatorial sex scandal.

 

[Shatmandu]

There's so many!

Worst State Fair booth ever: The "Have Spock Guess Your Penis Length" game.

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Worst State Fair booth ever: The "Have Spock Guess Your Penis Length" game.

Which isn't half as bad as "Have Chekov Guess Your Clitoral Length."

 

[cooleddie74]

Uhura could never make it through an entire Jim Kirk lecture on the nobility of Starfleet and its mission.

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Chekov (off-camera): ...if shoe fits, vear it!
Spock: <Ahem> Mr. Chekov, you have a string of toilet paper on your right boot...
Uhura: ...again. Russian whiz-kid, my black ass!

 

[cooleddie74]

The lines for the buffet at the new shipboard CiCi's Pizza was insane.

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Laundry day always ended in a meticulous underwear inspection by Mr. Spock.

Spock: Now turn. Okay, that's good. Now dance sexy. Yes. Yes. Right there.

 

[cooleddie74]

UHURA:"Shhhhheeeeesh...


All I wanted to do was renew my driver's license and LEAVE..."

 

[Daneel]

Just to add on to my earlier entry...

SPOCK: "Good morning cadets, and welcome to 4th year advanced biology. The topic of today's lecture is 'Intimate Inter-species Relations'. As members of Starfleet, you will encounter many new alien species on your missions, and if any of you took Captain Kirk's leadership skills course, you will probably end up having sex with them. It is important to note, however, that not all species have sexual relations in the same way, and if you do not educate yourself on their mating habits prior to attempting a physical relationship with them, you will most likely find yourself in an awkward and problematic situation -- like the one that can be seen in this recording of Commander Uhura and I during our Academy days. Witness her struggle and frustration over being unable to 'turn me on' in the manner she expected. Now, are there any questions?"

CADET BEHIND SPOCK: "Yeah... why are there only two chairs in this entire classroom?"

SPOCK: "The rest don't arrive until Tuesday, so suck it up cadet."