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I Was Strangled and Beaten by a Stranger. I'm Injured. I'm Angry.

Every step is a big step, every small success a major accomplishment. You just keep on keeping on, Bears. We're here for you too.

J.

What's good about doing it this way is it saved me from having to meet with the management in person. I'm pissed off that I'm obligated to give them a full month's worth of rent for an apartment that I cannot even physically enter because one of their tenants whom they knew was a danger disabled me. I didn't want to give them a dime, on principle.

But, I don't want to go through eviction proceedings on top of everything else.

So they're getting the money. Good thing its coming in the mail, because if I had to deliver it in person I'd be tempted to spit on them for good measure.
 
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The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step...you did well today.

Monday, after a Sunday with some loving family down time, you will be ready to take some more.

I know what you mean about the little, normally routine things. On way to visit hubby in one of his hospital stays I stopped off to get a soda. Emptied much change on the counter to get rid of some and the guy "bought" most of my change from me. The literal weight reduction in my purse was multiplied so much by the kindness.

May you encounter so many more of these sorts of kindnesses in the days ahead. You have earned them and so much more.
 
This is all so crazy. And I know how much that broken foot had been bothering you to begin with. I am so sorry this has happened to you, and you have every right to be angry. The last year or so has been shitty for you and there's no denying it. Hopefully this year will be one of the worst in your life, so from here on out it will only get better.

First I want to say that being a historic building does NOT exempt you from ADA requirements. They have their own set of slightly different rules to follow, but handicap accessibility is always required. There may be some crappy loophole they are hiding behind, but maybe not. When you get a lawyer I would ask him about this.

Alright. I think that you should look at the positive side of this. For a while now you have been living in a place you don't like, with a job you hate. This is your chance to start a new life. You can do whatever you want from here. This is an opportunity that you have to take. If you need to live with your mom for a while, do so. There is no shame in that, especially if it is because of a situation like this. Don't be afraid to ask for financial help from her either for relocating, the fees that you will face, etc. if she has the resources. It's not ideal, but she is your mom and if you need her to take care of you for a while, that is okay. It does not mean that you are worth any less or that you have no independence. Independence, more than anything, is a state of mind. Everybody needs help sometimes, and one day your mom may need help from you, so you will have a chance to repay the favor.

Now, about relocating...do it! If you really don't want to live with your mother any longer, or you decide to stay with her until you're feeling better and then move, either way you need to get out of L.A. That place is killing you, physically and psychologically. I second the moving to Sacramento suggestion. :D If you want to stay in California there are millions of places to go besides the Bay Area and Southern California. The Sacramento Valley really is a great place, especially since it has a huge variety of settings (urban, suburban, foothills, by the Delta, rural, etc.). It's not THAT far from SoCal. I also think that Arizona would be an awesome choice since you would be closer to a family member. Wherever you go, don't be afraid, just do it! Do you really want to live in L.A. forever? As much as you love your boyfriend and family, you have to be able to come home every day to a place that you enjoy and feel safe and comfortable in.

And along with moving, you abosultely NEED to find a new job. See if you can telecommute with this job you have for now, but figure out fairly soon where you want to move to and start looking for a job there immediately. Honestly I think that ANY job would be better than the one you currently have. And if you are moving to an area with cheaper living expenses then you can afford to take a crappy job at first while you look for something better. It doesn't have to be something you love, it just has to get you away from L.A. as quickly as possible. You can always continue searching for a job once you get there.

It may seem like too much work to do at this time, but I think that if I was in your position I would enjoy having this kind of work to get my mind off of the negative thoughts. I could see myself getting really depressed over a situation like this if I didn't put my energy into turning it into a positive change. I don't know if you will feel the same, but you might.

So stay positive. It is terribly unfair and horrible what happened to you, and you should definitely pursue justice. But how would you feel if you never received justice for what happened AND you were still unhappy in L.A. with your crappy job. That would be devestating on all fronts. But imagine that you were living in a place you loved with a job that was at least acceptable. Losing your case in that instance would be sad and unfair, to be sure, but you would at least have other things in your life to look forward to and be happy about.

Look to the future, to where you want to be, and change your life for the better. If something like this doesn't compel you to do that, nothing will. Get better soon, good luck with your legal battles, with moving and finding a new job, and STAY POSITIVE!
 
You've already taken so much of this incident on your own shoulders, Bears. Passing off a little bit of responsibility to the United States Post Office sounds like an excellent move.
 
Bears, you don't know me from Adam (neither does the rest of the board for that matter, since I'm a lurker of the first degree), but I'm going to risk looking foolish and say a few words anyway. When faced with such an unspeakable act of random hatred it feels absolutely immoral not to respond with a random act of kindness. I almost didn't, to tell you the truth. I clicked away from the thread and came back when I thought of the people who saw your plight and did nothing. How many times in our lives do we walk on by or stay silent because we don't think our small acts of kindness will make a difference? We never know what effect we will have in bettering the world unless we try.

So with that in mind, I hope you'll accept the thoughts and prayers of a stranger. I wish you a speedy recovery and successful legal proceedings. And though I can...Well not understand, because I don't think anyone could truly understand what you've been through without having been there themselves...But I can imagine the anger and the fear you feel. Despite all of that I hope you can see there is more in the world than the hatred that hurt you. One only needs to look at the outpouring of support for you in the preceding pages to see that there is love and compassion out there, and that it is stronger than the evil you encountered. It may sound trite, but I believe it's true.

Good luck.

That is all.
 
What would happen if this guy were to suddenly "disappear"?

Not that this has to do with my upcoming visit in socal next weekend, just asking.
 
Every step is a big step, every small success a major accomplishment. You just keep on keeping on, Bears. We're here for you too.

J.
What's good about doing it this way is it saved me from having to meet with the management in person. I'm pissed off that I'm obligated to give them a full month's worth of rent for an apartment that I cannot even physically enter because one of their tenants whom they knew was a danger disabled me. I didn't want to give them a dime, on principle.

But, I don't want to go through eviction proceedings on top of everything else.

So they're getting the money. Good thing its coming in the mail, because if I had to deliver it in person I'd be tempted to spit on them for good measure.

I wouldn't blame you one bit for doing it, either.

J.
 
Well, here's a silver lining.

Rent in LA and greater LA has dropped like a rock, even in the mere 4 months since I last moved.

I've spent a good chunk of my day hunting on CL for a new place. Whether work will let me telecommute remains to be seen, so I'm taking an eye to the Greater LA area just in case they say no.

Speaking of work, the person who is covering for me is frakking up in a bad way. I work for a website that does adult advertising (yeah shit job but it is a paycheck). Another coworker, who is telling a very different story than management about how well work is faring without me, let me know that this guy is direct linking our competitor to our site, and giving our competitor tons of free traffic!

If I did that, I would be fired immediately. I am also ultimately responsible for what gets direct linked to our site, so they could construe this as my fault, even though I've been out for nearly 7 full working days.

I've had it up with bullshit. I just don't give a crap about being polite anymore, not after this week. So I sent a very angry email to the guy and told him to remove the direct links immediately. CC'ed it to my boss. I hope they fire his ass. He's a product of nepotism. He's the sales manager's friend. They hired him against my recommendation as a favor to the sale manager's family, and he's been nothing but a fuck up and dead weight since day one. I hope he's nailing his own coffin shut.

Gawd, I do not need this stress on top of everything else.
 
Well, here's a silver lining.

Rent in LA and greater LA has dropped like a rock, even in the mere 4 months since I last moved.

I've spent a good chunk of my day hunting on CL for a new place. Whether work will let me telecommute remains to be seen, so I'm taking an eye to the Greater LA area just in case they say no.

Speaking of work, the person who is covering for me is frakking up in a bad way. I work for a website that does adult advertising (yeah shit job but it is a paycheck). Another coworker, who is telling a very different story than management about how well work is faring without me, let me know that this guy is direct linking our competitor to our site, and giving our competitor tons of free traffic!

If I did that, I would be fired immediately. I am also ultimately responsible for what gets direct linked to our site, so they could construe this as my fault, even though I've been out for nearly 7 full working days.

I've had it up with bullshit. I just don't give a crap about being polite anymore, not after this week. So I sent a very angry email to the guy and told him to remove the direct links immediately. CC'ed it to my boss. I hope they fire his ass. He's a product of nepotism. He's the sales manager's friend. They hired him against my recommendation as a favor to the sale manager's family, and he's been nothing but a fuck up and dead weight since day one. I hope he's nailing his own coffin shut.

Gawd, I do not need this stress on top of everything else.

sounds like alot of ass needs to be kicked out in L.A....just say the word
 
Sounds like the attacker is on a lot of shit lists right now...

Bears, I could call up a friend or 2 in the USAF..call in some favors and get a precision guided munition "accidently" hitting the pencil necked homicidal maniac's apartment...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HmGxKYM2KyI

Though a lawsuit will make him suffer for a much longer period.
 
Bears, you don't know me from Adam (neither does the rest of the board for that matter, since I'm a lurker of the first degree), but I'm going to risk looking foolish and say a few words anyway. When faced with such an unspeakable act of random hatred it feels absolutely immoral not to respond with a random act of kindness. I almost didn't, to tell you the truth. I clicked away from the thread and came back when I thought of the people who saw your plight and did nothing. How many times in our lives do we walk on by or stay silent because we don't think our small acts of kindness will make a difference? We never know what effect we will have in bettering the world unless we try.

So with that in mind, I hope you'll accept the thoughts and prayers of a stranger. I wish you a speedy recovery and successful legal proceedings. And though I can...Well not understand, because I don't think anyone could truly understand what you've been through without having been there themselves...But I can imagine the anger and the fear you feel. Despite all of that I hope you can see there is more in the world than the hatred that hurt you. One only needs to look at the outpouring of support for you in the preceding pages to see that there is love and compassion out there, and that it is stronger than the evil you encountered. It may sound trite, but I believe it's true.

Good luck.

That is all.

Your "random act of kindness" means the world to me, seriously. :)

Thank you so much for responding with this lovely note, and it was not trite of you to respond at all.

To call this experience life-changing is an understatement; I think the ultimate change to come from this will be for the better.

Apathy is my new enemy. I realize that I have been very self-absorbed and insular most of my life. I have to change that, because I don't want anyone else to go through what I've gone through this week.

Maybe, if nothing else, this experience will give me some sort of focus I've lacked up until now. Maybe rage, stress and indignation are talking right now, but I feel like I have a purpose for the first time in my life. The realization came upon me the day before yesterday and it was the closest thing to a spiritual awakening I've ever experienced. I almost feel a zen calm realizing that no matter what happens, even if I never get justice, I will be alright because I've been given a gift and a lesson. Delivered in an especially crappy way, but a gift nonetheless. :lol:

I did unto others and this is what I got: an eyeopening crash course in the need to keep doing unto others. The more apathy and dismissiveness I come up against, the more I know I did the right thing and I have to keep doing the right thing. I can never be like the people who looked the other way while this happened, or are looking me in the eye now and deciding not to bother.
 
Maybe rage, stress and indignation are talking right now, but I feel like I have a purpose for the first time in my life.

When you feel that you have a purpose, that is never evidence of rage or indignation talking. It's evidence of strength, intelligence and compassion, which you have in abundance. Keep it up! :techman:
 
Like i said earlier dear, give me the word and i'll drop what i'm doing and come help you with anything, even if it's just a ride somewhere.
 
I did unto others and this is what I got: an eyeopening crash course in the need to keep doing unto others. The more apathy and dismissiveness I come up against, the more I know I did the right thing and I have to keep doing the right thing. I can never be like the people who looked the other way while this happened, or are looking me in the eye now and deciding not to bother.

With all the shit you've been dealing with recently, it would have been very easy to say "f* everything" and retreat into yourself and insulate yourself against the world so that you wouldn't have the possibility of getting hurt again.

That you have gone the other way speaks to the strength of your character.

That strength will get you through this and you will be a better person on the other side.

If more people had the strength of character that you've shown, I daresay the world would be a better place.

I will join in on any convoy to "teach the guy a lesson".

Stay strong.
 
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