Skipping kindergarten

[Neopeius]

I've got a 4 year old, turns 5 next month. Like her parents, she is exceedingly bright and she's had a good pre-school. So she knows virtually everything they teach in kindergarten.

Unfortunately, she turns 5 in mid-March which means she'd have to go to kindergarten next year and then 1st grade.

That just seems a waste of time. I'd like to promote her to 1st as quickly as possible. That's what they did for me and I've always been glad of it (my birthday is in late February).

Anyone else been in this situation?

 

[Alpha Romeo]

I've got a 4 year old, turns 5 next month. Like her parents, she is exceedingly bright and she's had a good pre-school. So she knows virtually everything they teach in kindergarten.

Unfortunately, she turns 5 in mid-March which means she'd have to go to kindergarten next year and then 1st grade.

That just seems a waste of time. I'd like to promote her to 1st as quickly as possible. That's what they did for me and I've always been glad of it (my birthday is in late February).

Anyone else been in this situation?

She may be bright but is she mature?

Besides, keep her in Kindergarten and she'll have her license before her friends and be 21 earlier in college. All recipes for fun and popularity!

 

[Mutai Sho-Rin]

Although the learning in Kindergarten may be minimal, the social orientation may be important. For both of our girls, valuable relational knowledge arose from that first year of formal education. If your kid is very bright, school curriculum will often be below her capability and you will need to augment her learning with more challenging work at home. Such was the case with our older daughter and the balance worked out very well.

 

[JAG]

The most important thing you learn in Kindergarten is socialization. If you are concerned about her being bored, talk to the teacher about the issue so they can keep an eye out for it.

 

[Gertch]

Our girls could have skipped kindergarten since my wife had been teaching them with workbooks for 2 years prior. But the socialization was a big factor for us. There is more time in kindergarten to interact than in first grade. Especially now with the heavy class loads they use to try and get the value up to 30 years ago.

Another consideration is applying for college. There is a competition for spots and if the child is not on the same maturity/development level as those a year ahead, then they might lose out.

I've heard of parents keeping their child back a year so they will have an advantage come college selection time.

 

[Holdfast]

I've got a 4 year old, turns 5 next month. Like her parents, she is exceedingly bright and she's had a good pre-school. So she knows virtually everything they teach in kindergarten.

Unfortunately, she turns 5 in mid-March which means she'd have to go to kindergarten next year and then 1st grade.

That just seems a waste of time. I'd like to promote her to 1st as quickly as possible. That's what they did for me and I've always been glad of it (my birthday is in late February).

Anyone else been in this situation?

I skipped a grade or two myself. Honestly, despite that, I don't think it matters one way or another and I wouldn't let the decision weigh too heavily on you.

Smart kids with smart parents get lots of their education at home anyway. I treated schooltime as a holiday most of time and did more productive work at home in the evenings or whatever.

If she enjoys K, let her stay there. If she's bored and making trouble for herself because of the boredom, promote her.

 

[B.J.]

I agree about the social aspect, but I'm kinda in the same boat here. My daughter will be starting Kindergarten next year too, but she's also been in daycare for the past few years. But as for her skipping K, we've come up against something else - apparently it's *the law* that they have to attend K, no skipping ahead a grade.

 

[John Picard]

Private school.

 

[ThunderAeroI]

I never went to Kindergarten, I went to Monissori for two years prior to 1st grade, so did my brother. You could call it Kindergarten; however, it wasn't.

 

[Hoser]

I agree about the social aspect, but I'm kinda in the same boat here. My daughter will be starting Kindergarten next year too, but she's also been in daycare for the past few years. But as for her skipping K, we've come up against something else - apparently it's *the law* that they have to attend K, no skipping ahead a grade.

That bites. My three year old is already starting to read, can write a lot of words quite well on his own, and does pretty much everything they teach in kindergarten.

 

[Jenee]

My older son was reading Dr. Suess books before kindergarten - but still went to pre-k, developmental K then 1st grade. And, I think he was better off because of it. My brother also thought his daughter (three months younger than mine) was ready for 1st grade without kindergarten and she struggled the entire 12 years.

 

[the 4th hanson bro]

I've heard of parents keeping their child back a year so they will have an advantage come college selection time.

We're keeping ours back a year so that they'll be bigger and stronger than the other kids in their grade and be able to totally dominate on the fields of athletic competition. Long term, multimillion dollar contracts are my wife and my retirement plans.

Should we have a back up plan?

 

[Kirby]

Keep your daughter in kindergarten for a couple of reasons. I skipped 2nd grade and always felt a little out of place since I was always younger than everyone else in my grade, so I was always the last one to get my license, hit puberty, develop athletically, etc. Also I had all these friends that I made in preschool, kindergarten, and 1st grade and then boom, I'm in a completely different class.

My son is now in 1st grade, but he loved kindergarten. The 1/2 day is a good transition, plus his kindergarten was really based on social activities, and fun stuff. Plus it gave him a lot of exposure to the bigger kids, and the general structure of how the school works.

 

[Neopeius]

My daughter has been going to pre-school for a while, full days, so the half-day will be a step back, not forward.

I keep hearing, "Hold her back--school's not for learning anyway."

Well, hell. More reason to get her through the damned thing faster.

 

[trampledamage]

School's definitely for learning - the problem is balancing academic skills with social skills.

It's a pity you didn't think of this last year - if your daughter is currently in preschool all day every day, then the best solution would have been to put her in kindergarten last year, so she's already transitioned into the school system.

There's no hard and fast correct answer - you have to judge your child, if she's as socially and emotionally mature as she is smart then yeah, skip kindergarten. If she still needs development time socially then suck up the fact that she'll be coasting through the learning and give her that space to learn the social skills she'll need to survive the rest of school.

I'm going through a similar decision process with my daughter at the moment - in that I'm trying to decide whether to move her to kindergarten early or let her stay in pre-school for another year.

 

[thestrangequark]

Private school.

Public, private, charter, or montessori, it depends on the individual school as to the quality of education children will receive. The variation between public schools is extreme, depending on the curriculum, the administration, the teachers, the funding, and parent involvement. I've worked at public schools that were of a vastly higher quality in regards to student achievement, teacher quality, and enrichment than many private schools.

My recommendation would be to look into the curricula being taught at the school -- it's more important than the grade level.

Kindergarten these days is not like it was when most of us were kids. Gone are the centers, the blocks, play time, and nap time. The schools are being forced to implement curricula that are so intently focused on reading, writing, and math, that the students have no time to learn what is important in kindergarten -- the social skills that others have mentioned. At least in New York, kindergarteners don't have time to play, and that's how children of that age really learn. As a result, there is a general lack of cooperation and communication skills that result in confrontations and violence.

But I digress; dependent upon your school's curricula, your daughter may not see much of a difference between kindergarten and first grade in regards to social development, so you might as well skip her.

 

[Spot's Meow]

I had a couple of acquaintances in elementary, middle, and high school that were a year younger because of skipping Kindergarten, and it was always kind of weird...they didn't fit in well with the other kids, developed later, and were sometimes even made fun of for being "too smart." Plus it caused some issues when entering college. They were only 17 and couldn't sign papers, couldn't get their own documents, had to have their parents sign everything and get everything for them since they weren't 18 yet. It was hard for them to be admitted to the dorms as well.

It seems like the world is built for the way the current system is, K-12, graduate at 18 or very close to it, then go on to college. It all fits together a certain way and taking one piece out of the puzzle can screw some things up. It's not a huge deal in life, but why bother with it when you can just put her in Kindergarten? What is most important is learning at home and having great teachers who are willing to challenge you, and that's true at any grade level.

ETA: Also, check your state requirements, some don't let you skip. In California you have to enter Kindergarten and let your child be in it for a certain number of weeks before they will consider moving them up (which the parent has to request). They would likely get moved up, but it sort of messes up their schedule to be switching in the middle of the school year.

 

[Alidar Jarok]

I've got a 4 year old, turns 5 next month. Like her parents, she is exceedingly bright and she's had a good pre-school. So she knows virtually everything they teach in kindergarten.

Unfortunately, she turns 5 in mid-March which means she'd have to go to kindergarten next year and then 1st grade.

That just seems a waste of time. I'd like to promote her to 1st as quickly as possible. That's what they did for me and I've always been glad of it (my birthday is in late February).

Anyone else been in this situation?

Honestly, going to class and being with kids the same age is just as important as not wasting time getting started on that learning thing. Also, although don't make it a focus, she might some day be interested in sports and being the youngest always gives you an unfair advantage playing and kills all enthusiasm (if she doesn't want to play sports, at least that option was on the table, which it couldn't be otherwise).

Sure some years of school will suck for the kid, but it'll help in the long run in ways that'll never show up in grades. It's not making everyone uniform, but a shared experience like this would prevent lots of hardships by being "off."

 

[TGTheodore]

A long time ago, when I was actually smart, I was the youngest in my first grade class. Back then, a buddy of mine and I were sent up two grades for Reading and Math, but returned to our class for most of the day.

While it kept us from getting bored, it was really weird being the smallest "eggheads" in the upper classes.

I enjoyed the social part of kindergarten a great deal, and bonded with kids who are still friends to this day. As others have said, it's much more for socialization for most kids, and a chance for others to get up to speed on knowledge.

Let her try kindergarten, and wait until at least first grade before considering skipping her up a grade or two. There's a BIG social difference being two or three years younger than your classmates -- especially in grade school.

--Ted

 

[Neopeius]

That's the thing, though--she's essentially *in* kindergarten now. Another year of it seems pointless just to make her the *oldest* kid in her class.

I did the half in, half out thing as a kid. They put me in 4th grade at age 5 which was fun because I was the class mascot and I got two recesses

I essentially stayed in 4th grade until 4th grade, but I was still half a year ahead because of my late birthday. It never ever hindered my social interactions. I wasn't good at athletics, but that's just because I sucked at athletics, not because I was a runt.

Anyway, I asked my daughter what she wanted, outlining the pros and cons. She said she wanted to go straight to 1st grade so she could become friends with big kids. We'll see what she says in 7 months, but if she still wants to, I plan to push her.

It's skipping half a grade for freak's sake. Is that so traumatic?