TOS Caption Contest #124 - 8 Days A Week

[cooleddie74]

TAL:"Excuse me, Captain.

Hello?

NOT NOW, Madeline!!"

 

[cooleddie74]

"I've done all I can, Captain.

Your Dish Network uplink is busted."

 

[Nerys Myk]

CHEKOV: Facemask, 15-yard penalty. First down!

 

[cooleddie74]

CHEKOV: "De WWE...it's getting lamer and lamer vit each passing year!"

 

[cooleddie74]

"Just one suggestion, Captain.

Can we get a SMALLER vodka shaker next time? Making your martinis is getting to be exhausting."

 

[Nerys Myk]

SPOCK: We put it back in the box and regift it. Who'll know?

 

[Toban Kal]

Captain, your new cappuccino machine just arrived.

 

[cooleddie74]

"The first Earth model of a primitive cellular telephone...

HOW did they ever use one?"

 

[Outpost4]

Chekov: He's got a better piece than you, keptain.

Great one, middyseafort. I've been trying to write that joke for a couple of days and couldn't.

"Have YOU ever tried to jerk off an inter-stellar probe?"

 

[cooleddie74]

The forbidden world of Vulcan-coffee maker love.

Often maligned.

Rarely understood.

 

[cooleddie74]

KOENIG CHEKOV:"Can ve turn de channel, keptin?

Dis movie alvays makes me cringe."

 

[Nerys Myk]

SPOCK: The surface is hot enough to melt iron. Luckily my Vulcan physiology includes a vestigial skin layer that insulates against heat.

MCCOY: Umm, no it doesn't

SPOCK: oh, in that case... AAAAAAGH!!!!THIS THING IS MOTHERFUCKING HOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Outpost4]

"Drapes, check."

 

[Shatmandu]

Spock, staccato: "Tan-Ru. Nomad. Klattu. R2. Twiki."

 

[Outpost4]

Spock: But, Jim, I'll never get this agitator back in our washing machine!
Kirk: So, Mr. Spock, this is an outside agitator, protesting?
Spock: That's it. I quit.

 

[Shatmandu]

McCoy, thinking: "See, if I hadn't made her do the nude jumping jacks, I'd have never seen her penis."

McCoy: "Word to the wise, young lady: Mister Spock is hung like a tick."

 

[The Squire of Gothos]

Scotty; "Left a bit, left a bit."
Kirk; "It's still a bit fuzzy."
Spock; "Just buy some damned cable."

 

[Rat Boy]

Spock: "I will let you have the moonshine still back, Mr. Scott. For a price."

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Great one, middyseafort. I've been trying to write that joke for a couple of days and couldn't.

Thanks!

Spock: I believe that I am... stuck.

 

[Nerys Myk]

SPOCK: I'm sensing words: Sexual...Harassment...Lawsuit