That would be so awesome if it was an alien death fleet coming to Earth!
Wait a minute...
Wait a minute...
For a little paranoia building regarding the alien theory, this AP statement from the Vatacan. http://ap.google.com/article/ALeqM5jNDAezCCDKzEJpnyPFSj7IVCvwawD90KSE100
For a little paranoia building regarding the alien theory, this AP statement from the Vatacan. http://ap.google.com/article/ALeqM5jNDAezCCDKzEJpnyPFSj7IVCvwawD90KSE100
So the Scientologists have infiltrated the Vatican now?
PRIEST MAXI
Look, people! I'm just trying to say
that if we don't change the Holy Document
of Vatican Law, then we might lose everyone
to atheism!
FRENCH CARDINAL
What exactly do you suggest we change,
Father Maxi.
PRIEST MAXI
Well, for one, no sex with boys.
ANOTHER CARDINAL
The Holy Document of Vatican Law states
that a priest, bishop, or cardinal cannot
get married, so where are we to get
our sex?
PRIEST MAXI
Uh well then, perhaps we could change
the Holy Document of Vatican Law to
say that... it's okay for a priest or
bishop or cardinal to have sex... with
women.
FRENCH CARDINAL
Women?
GELGAMEK CARDINAL
The Gelgamek vagina is three feet wide
and filled with razor-sharp teeth. Do
you really expect us to have sex with
them?!
PRIEST MAXI
Wuh- okay, m-maybe we just need to forget
about the Gelgameks for a second and
focus-
GELGAMEK CARDINAL
What's that about the Gelgameks?!
PRIEST MAXI
I'm just saying, what works on planet
Gelgamek isn't necessarily goin' ta
work for the rest of us here, on Earth.
You see? That's the problem we're having
here.
ITALIAN CARDINAL
But-a the Holy Document of Vatican Law
cannot be changed!
PRIEST MAXI
Why not?!
ANOTHER CARDINAL
Because we don't know where it is.
ITALIAN CARDINAL
You see, Father, the Holy Document of
Vatican Law has been hidden away deep
in the Catacombs of-a St. Peter's below
us. Hidden away so that it can never
be changed.
PRIEST MAXI
But if we locate it we can make changes
to it?
A BISHOP
HA! Good luck, father! The document
is guarded by water lizards, rattle
snakes and sand traps! The fools who
have tried before to recover it met
their deaths!
PRIEST MAXI
Well we have to try. Our religion is
dying!
Well it's the 14th so whats the announcement?
Well it's the 14th so whats the announcement?
We have to wait for 1 p.m. EDT (US time) remember.
It will be announced that NASA has saved a bundle by switching to Geico.If it was really a "big announcement", they wouldn't just have a telecon on it, there would be a show from HQ...and there isn't one.
I think everyone is going to be let down.
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