TNG Caption This #133 - "Habitual Theft"

Geordi: "Yes, this is Lieutenant Commander Data, a unique Soong type android, operating at a couple of quadrillion operations a second, possessing a positronic brain and certified by Starfleet as possessing full sentience and free will. He's the Enterprise's 2nd Officer, Chief Operations officer, Science officer, a leader in the field of positronics himself, and flycatcher."

Data: "I have captured another one Geordi."

 

Data: "For all the Klingon bluster, their testicles are actually quite small."





Picard: "Going up against the Borg, we need more cannon fodder ...

Riker: "Mister Worf, contact the Klingon High Command ..."

 

Worf: "But, Commander, this 'game' does not accurately simulate the hunting of ducks."

 

Riker: So our target is a black cat in a closet with the light off?

 

Metathesis is one of the most common of pronunciation errors, sir... a reversal of vowel and consonant, "bark" to "broc"... Oh, this? Just a coincidence, sir.



Riker: Man, I wish Noonien Soong had seen these guys.

 

Grignak, the fish-looking coffee asswipe: "Blend you name, money I name, otherwise tea nooooooooooo."

Riker: "I hate drive-through."

 

I have transported one of Counselor Troi's pubic hairs as ordered, Captain.


See Captain?
Sexy...NOT sexy.
People like...People don't like.
Good...Not good. Not...good...at...all.

 

Data: "Heeere.."

 

Data: "No sir. I have no knowledge of who has been painting mustaches on the crew."

 

First:
Data: Unfortunately, this is the actual amount of engineering skill Geordi possesses.

Second:
Riker: See! Work walks more like a striptease queen!

 

RIKER: Hey Worf, since you're up can you change the channel? I lost the remote.

 

I am fully functional. Case in point: a booger. QED.


Waiter! Sometime today please.



A little more shut the hell up, Picard.

 

"See, Commander Riker?

Geordi does have lice. And they are spreading!"




"Quick, Mister Worf...Photoshop something horribly inappropriate onto that screen!! NOW, dammit!!!"

 

Spiner indicates his own chances of having a career after TNG ends.

 

^ Multiplied by Burton's remaining credibility from Roots.

EDIT: Or maybe here's that joke. I've been trying to write it ever since I saw this pic:



Burton: I was a star after Roots. Now here I am, squinting through a hair clip with a prancing Stan Laurel behind me. Motherfuck!

 

Terrell: "Oh, too slow! Looks like you're just Number Two now!"

 

Riker: Fuck the Borg! Come on, who's going to join me? Fuck the Borg! Everyone, now give them the salute, Fuck the Borg!