I'm not sure exactly how much character development we got out of that, maybe Nine but by the third series the Doctor spent more time moping about Wose than he did over murdering billions of people! Plus "I killed all the Timelords" seems kinda flippant to me, and suggests just a bunch of old men and women in silly hats died. It was Moffat who put this into context, who showed us this included children. It was a neat way to get the timelords out of the way when the show returned but carrying the guilt of killing billions of kids, forever? The Doctor has enough guilt, so I don't care that Moffat reversed this.
And I'd argue RTD is as bad at being flippant about loss as Moffat. Rose lost her dad when she was a child, but that's ok, love, have alt universe Pete! And Rose lost the love of her life, but that's ok, love, have metacrisis me with added mortality so he's unlikely to leave you, and Donna lost EVERYTHING but that's ok, love, have a winning lottery ticket, and Jack sacrificed his own grandchild but that's ok, mate, why don't you shag Alonso.
And I'll take Eleven's "We all change" speech over Ten's whiny "I don't want to go" any day but YMMV
"The man who never would!" says Ten in the Doctor's Daughter. Well I mean the man who actually has on numerous occasions, let's be honest here.
He gassed a bunch of Sea Devils but at least he didn't use a gun. He used a cyanide soaked rag to kill Shockeye, but at least he didn't use a gun, and he used a nuclear missile to kill David Bradley in Dinosaurs on a Spaceship but at least he didn't use a gun!
But then the idea of the Doctor is often different to the reality. "No second chances, I'm that kind of a man." Unless you're the Master or Davros in which case you can have as many fucking chances as you want!
And don't get me started on a character who thinks life as a living paving slab is acceptable but life as a cyberman isn't! (and that's within four episodes of each other)
Does the Doctor always seek a non violent solution in the first (and second and third) instance? Yes. Does the Doctor abhor the use of weapons. Yes. Will the Doctor happily use whatever means necessary to prevent the deaths of others. Absolutely.
Is the Doctor in fact a bit of a hypocrite? Yes, but to paraphrase Eight, they are one of the nice ones.