Her archetype is kind of ironic though, when you think about it. Back before Deanna was born, she was the quintessential Star Trek sexy alien ambassadorial goddess from the nudie telepathy love planet, not unlike the countless alien babes Kirk encountered, who were all too happy to jump into a valiant young Starfleet officer's bed
Which is what she got. She married a Starfleet officer, who probably came to her planet & swept her off her feet like a swashbuckling Kirk might've done. Except, it didn't work out to be any happily ever after for her. He died in the line of duty, after having lost a child, & now she's getting old, & it gets harder to hold onto that alien goddess identity, & she retreats into this overbearing persona as a defense mechanism
Of course she's a bit of a snob. She was a telepathic royal sexpot. Ironically, as hard as the character might be to tolerate, it kind of works realistically, once you have the whole story.