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How to make friends?

Captain alex

Lieutenant
Red Shirt
Umm... does anyone on here have any real life friends (outside of work)? :alienblush:

The last time I had friends was at university. :eek:

From my experience, the types of people I like to be friends (thoughtful self-conscious interesting types or on the other end of the spectrum, interesting funny types) with are either hermits, hard to meet, rare, or live scattered hundreds of miles apart.

When I meet people I like, it's like fireworks, I'm so happy. I've tried making friends with non like minded types but have come to the unfortunate realisation that they just make me feel more lonely. And that covers 90% of people. :shrug:

Even after I get to know non-like minded types well & give them a chance, it feels almost more lonely than being in my own company alone 24/7. (Which I now am)
 
That's a tough one! For me, friendships just happen and sometimes they last for years and sometimes they fade away. I'm not the most gregarious or sociable person either... I can't remember when I last made a new friend... Most of my current friends are people I met in high school or at uni, and I got my degree 20 years ago.
Also, making friends is a bit like dating in that if you appear too desperate, people will give you a wide berth. I wish you luck in meeting new people and making friends.
 
As an introvert they're more trouble than they're worth. Just learn to enjoy your own company. That doesn't mean sitting in the house on your own all the time, find a bar/other places that play music or do something else you like.
 
All my RL friends began as work friends in various jobs over the years. I'm lucky to have had friendships that ran super deep, but unfortunately life takes people in different directions and my nearest and dearest friends have moved on or are soon to.

Some people I've become close with are nothing like me and some share few common interests. It's amazing how despite that you can still click with a person. I guess shared suffering in the workplace can do that:lol:
 
LOLzibob, sorry, I should have explained myself better. I find it easy to make friends & I'm a likeable person (as is everyone!), but meeting people whose company I personally actually enjoy is relatively rare. I think this is partly what I'm on about..
 
As an introvert they're more trouble than they're worth.
OOH prey tell! Why are they more trouble than they're worth? What dark secrets are there :devil:

Go to a Star Trek convention and strike up a conversation.
I had that idea too. As Star Trek's no. 1 fan, could you believe I've never been to a convention?! Never! Ever!! I always seem to find out about them when it's too late, or when I plan to go, something happens in my life to stop me going (cosmic events e.g. asteroid-hitting-my-house-scale of things).

All my RL friends began as work friends in various jobs over the years. I'm lucky to have had friendships that ran super deep.
I need super deep friendships! :devil:

Some people I've become close with are nothing like me and some share few common interests. It's amazing how despite that you can still click with a person. I guess shared suffering in the workplace can do that:lol:

I've had the same experience! But it doesn't make it any less rare for me :crazy: I once stayed at an Air B n B place and the host was so much on my wavelength I wanted to say "hey lets be friends" hahaha but I'd have sounded too desperate. She actually wanted me to move in she liked me so much! But we live so far away from each other. That kinda person is the type you meet once in a blue moon (e.g. once in 5 years). You know the type who gets your quirkiness & whom you can tell anything & know they won't judge but will laugh with u & who understands life is too short for ego.

Might. I. just. add..

I LOVE THIS AUTO MULTI QUOTE SYSTEM!! :p

I wish more forums had this system. It makes it so much easier :D
 
Sure, though we met through our common interest of Sci-Fi and whilst I don't perhaps see them as often as I would like due to distance.
 
Best thing to do in here, and I do mean well, is relax, get a feel for the different sorts about and don't get too hung up on the squabbles.

By and large it's fair to say there's a wide mix of people in here from different backgrounds, although there's a clear left wing bias in our politics.
 
LOLzibob, sorry, I should have explained myself better. I find it easy to make friends & I'm a likeable person (as is everyone!), but meeting people whose company I personally actually enjoy is relatively rare. I think this is partly what I'm on about..
So, do you include a bunch of people whose company you don't actually enjoy in your circle of friends? Because you say it's easy to make friends but then finding people whose company you enjoy is rare, which is either a contradictory statement or using a completely different definition of friendship than I have ever heard.
 
Different cities and towns have different "personalities". For example, where I live, people are super cliquey and introverted in general and it's extremely hard and near impossible to make new friends if you don't go join some sort of social or hobby club.

That said, when I lived in another city, I could literally go out on the night and end up with 15 new people on my Facebook friends group because people would just come over and start talking and I made literally more friends in a week in that city, than I did in a decade in another city.

Basically I find the best way to make friends is through music scenes, people are generally way more open and friendly at music events than pretty much everywhere else (the drugs and alcohol probably help). Anything to do with Hippies, you're going to make friends at pretty much, while I can't stand the hippy anti-science ideology, I've always found hippies to be the most nicest, friendly and open people in general.
 
Different cities and towns have different "personalities". For example, where I live, people are super cliquey and introverted in general and it's extremely hard and near impossible to make new friends if you don't go join some sort of social or hobby club.

That said, when I lived in another city, I could literally go out on the night and end up with 15 new people on my Facebook friends group because people would just come over and start talking and I made literally more friends in a week in that city, than I did in a decade in another city.

Basically I find the best way to make friends is through music scenes, people are generally way more open and friendly at music events than pretty much everywhere else (the drugs and alcohol probably help). Anything to do with Hippies, you're going to make friends at pretty much, while I can't stand the hippy anti-science ideology, I've always found hippies to be the most nicest, friendly and open people in general.

agreed! with everything u said
 
Meetup.com

I’ve made friends through a group I found there.

Conventions are a good way of meeting people and making friends too.
 
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