To me though this felt like the safe way to go more than something I feel is the most common form of homophobia.
It's not about "safe," because telling a story is not
exclusively about polemic. It's about character. It's about emotions and relationships. Making a moral point can certainly be part of it, but it's bad writing if your characters are
nothing except puppets for a statement about morality. It's fine if you want to tell a story with a message, but I always keep in mind something Gene Roddenberry was known to say (in the original series era, when he still had sensible priorities): if you want the audience to stick around and hear the message, you have to entertain them first. And that means creating multidimensional characters with interestingly complex relationships. It doesn't mean reducing everyone to a stereotype of whatever behavior you want to preach about.
The story about Maggie and Oscar is a story about a relationship between a father and a daughter. There is no way that
can't be extremely complex and multilayered. Even with homophobia as a factor, it wouldn't be the
only factor, and it would be -- again -- bad writing to ignore that human reality just for the sake of moralizing. Fortunately, what we got was good writing, so it was complex.
Besides, the fact that the kind of homophobia you're talking about is more common means people already know about it. You're asking for the obvious, the predictable. Instead, they gave us something more unexpected, more layered, and therefore a lot more interesting.
This feels more like something coming from a concerned father than someone who doesn't want to acknowledge her existence or thinks being gay is just a choice.
It's both. That's just it. Human beings feel more than one thing at a time. You can't reduce an entire person to a single thought or motivation. Oscar feels
both love for his daughter
and an inability to accept or understand her lifestyle, and it's the tension between those things that creates the conflict.
If that was how he really felt i'm not sure if disowning her really jells well with that idea. It feels more like something you would constantly be getting into arguments over but still staying in touch.
Maybe that's what will happen going forward, but keep in mind that he's had a couple of decades to think about what led him to reject her. Maybe it took him that long to understand why he was so angry. Hate is often the flipside of love. Intense love can lead to intense pain, so intense you can't bear to face it so you have to cut yourself off from the person who causes it.