Also, I think that a family where a child dies is more realistic than a family in which everybody keeps smiling for apparently no reason.
I'm not sure I agree with that. Yeah there might be family tragedy, but there has to be a middle ground. I think my issue was Torres made it a big deal about how unrealistic the positive family was, but when we see the negative family, I think it's equally unrealistic. You can have issues in a family, (I do almost every day) but there is still love there. Other than the scene with the Doctor and Belle, which amounted to a goodbye scene, there wasn't really a love factor there.
Take Tom, e.g. You'd think of him as the emotionally immature womanizer (remember he says at the beginning of the show he has five girlfriends at home?) who is not capable of deeper emotions. Then you watch the series and you realize how much he changes in this (and other) respect(s). One of the stations on his way of personal development is this episode. It's him, the guy who's never thought of himself as a family guy who makes the Doctor understand what a family is really for:
"Well, think about what's happened to us here on Voyager. Everyone left people behind, and everyone suffered a loss, but look how it's brought us all closer together. We found support here, and friendship, and we've become a family in part because of the pain we shared. If you turn your back on this programme you'll always be stuck at this point. You'll never have the chance to say goodbye to your daughter, or to be there for your wife and son when they need you, and you'll be cheating yourself of the chance to have their love and support. In the long run you'll miss the whole point of what it means to have a family."
I love this scene. Janeway says something similar at the end of Year of Hell, but to hear it come from Paris was quite something considering how he was treated in Caretaker. He's come a long way in 3 years.