TNG Caption This! #437: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Hello everyone! New Contest time!




First up to the plate, we have the "Protective Garments" Award, going to:

Next, we have the "Unlimited Data Plan" Award, going to:

Next, we have the "Illogical Locations" Award, going to:

Next, we have the "Some learn from history, some don't" Award, going to:

Next, we have the "Fairly Warned" Award, going to:

Next, something we don't have too often, but is really a pleasure to see when it happens!



It's such a joy to see that the competitors here don't work in a vacuum, but play off of each other and every once and awhile make some great running gags together. The Award goes to:

Great entries to this running gag include (but are not limited to)

And...

Our Photoshop Award, goes to:

Many thanks to everyone who participated and congrats to our winners!

Once again, many thanks to shivkala for the contest idea and image suggestions!

Before we go on, my original plan was to have this weeks contest be "Sweeps Part II: Action!" However, due to the recent attacks in Paris and elsewhere, I didn't think it was appropriate for that kind of contest.

It was suggested to me that we should have the same contest regardless, but to me, this is a safe place, where everyone can come to see something funny and make someone laugh.

I don't know where everyone who posts here is from, and I know even less about those who just read the contests, but today and this week, I think it's most important that no matter where you are or where you call home, that people feel comfortable and can enjoy the creativity and humor of the fine caption competitors I am proud to see here every week.

My heart goes out to all those affected by these terrible events and if the horror of them has touched you, I wish you the very best.

And now, lets get the captioning started!











Enjoy!

 

Picard: I can do this too, Number One.



Data: According to Lieutenant Worf's personal logs, he is quite upset that Ambassador K'Ehleyr has not returned his subspace calls in the last 3 months.

Worf: (thinking) Must they do that here?!



Troi: Anyway, I know you have a crush on me, but I just have to tell you about this new guy I'm dating.

Barclay cries.



Picard: Wait... Wait....Now!

Yar: Hailing frequencies open.

First Officer's Log: I may have to let the Captain lead some Away missions, he's starting to over-dramatize everything again.



K'Ehleyr: So anyway, Worf brought me flowers and wrote the sweetest love poems...

Worf: Oh, please stop.

 

Thanks for the win



Troi: You need to stop this. You need to accept that we aren't friends. I wouldn't drop by your place for ice cream or leave the Enterprise for help with one of your holograms.

Barclay cries.

 

Picard: "Yes ... yes ... almost thereee aaaaannnd GOT IT. Will, activate the view screen in the subspace communication. Tasha, it is imperitive yopu don't move or it won't look like I have my finger on your right boob."




Barclay: "Oh God!" (sobs)

Troi: "There, there, Reg, it's not so bad. You'll only be in about a dozen episodes of Voyager. If it makes you feel any better, me and Will will do the series finale."


OR...

"I'm not saying you don't get to have sex with me, but ... well, actually, I am saying that. And you're weird."

 

STEWART: So I can get rid of one of them?

CROSBY: You could at least pretend to give it some thought!

 

Deanna: Look, Reg, I had to let Will cook us breakfast at least once. Now shall I get a bucket?

 

Counselor Troi is on vacation. I'm her replacement. My name is Matt Foley and I am a motivational speaker. So, let me give you a little bit of a scenario of what my life is all about. First up, I am 35 years old. I am divorced and I live in a van down by the river.

 

Picard: The riker lean isn't exclusive to you!


Picard: Worf ... you lucky dog *Wolf Whistle*

 

T4TW LeadHead!

Radio: - And now stay tuned for an uninterrupted hundred and eighty minute block of Ressikan Flute music!
Picard: Give the people what they want, Will.
Data: Switching off hearing chip now.
Riker: There are times, Mister Data, when I envy you.




Picard: I still say your skin is green, Data.
Troi: Neon Avocado would be my guess.
Riker: Regardless, Soong's original spec sheet should tell us what color the manufacturer used.
Data: Here it is..."Ghost Turd Pantone 47-3689."
Picard: "Discontinued by the manufacturer." Interesting.




Troi: I'm sorry Reg, I can't do therapy in my cowboy outfit. The other therapists will laugh me out of the Catsuit Association.




Picard: I've told you, Number One. You have to wait until I've started the stream before you can talk to me.




Troi: I sensed that...!

 

Thanks for the KBLA!



Picard: ...as you can see from the video, 'Bob Wheeler' appears 6 times in court. We know your head was around in the 20th Century. Explain yourself Mr. Data.

 

RIKER: ...and then say, "Do you want a little Captain in you?"

PICARD: This works?

DATA: 100% failure rate by all estimations.

 

Picard: Mr. Worf, you are truly a man of many talents.

Worf: Struck out twice, sir.

Picard: Really? I find that very hard to believe.

Worf: Bah! E-harmony has no honor!

 

Picard: Do you know the difference between me and you, Number 1? I make this look goooooood.

 

WINNER!

 

First Officer's Log: If it wasn't for the moving furniture injury from my first year at the Academy, I'd put up my foot on this end of the Ops station.

 

Thanks for the win, Leadhead.



Worf: Don't tell me, this is one of those mind-swap things again, isn't it?

Geordi: Ship's chronometer says it's Tuesday...so, yeah, mind-swap again.



Riker: Sir, I'm sensing Troi has to sneeze.



Troi: I don't think of you that way, Reg. You're like a brother to me!

Reg cries...



Picard: Wesley has entered the shuttlebay. Open the doors on my mark...MARK!



Picard: I hate seeing them go, but I love watching them leave. Am I right, Lt. Worf?!

RIKER: They've done studies, you know. 60% of the time, it works every time.

 

Allow me to introduce tits....




...and ass.

 

Science Officer: ``Hey ... where is everybody?''




Dr Crusher: ``Hey ... where is everybody?''




Troi: ``I'm sensing that you feel like the stomach flu is making everything in your stomach rush out through your mouth. Is that right?''
Barclay: ``MmmMMWooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRAAARGH!''




Picard: ``Before we fire phasers, and I know this is going to sound a little crazy, but let's try a transmission of ska music. And have some rocksteady for after that first volley.''




Picard: ``You let them take your lunch money, Worf?''
Worf: ``I did not let them. I just could not stop them.''

 

Picard: And that, Number One, is how it's done.

 

Picard: "Mr. Worf, I bet I hit that before you do."