Because Uhura, McCoy and the others are NOT the protagonists (Kirk and Spock are) it's completely, well, logical that narrative-vise you will see more of these secondary characters ONLY if they have some sort of bond or personal connection with the protagonists.
It actually was like that in tos too for
Spock and Bones but people ignore that and the fact that reboot Uhura is no more reduced to Spock's girlfriend than McCoy
is reduced to being just Kirk's best friend (they should actually have a scene together where they commiserate about K/S driving them insane). I ask myself why people don't have a problem with that, yet they need Uhura to 'prove' that she's more than a love interest even though, well, she is more than that already. She has a much active role in the story than McCoy and shows and uses her skills as an officer more.
It seems that secondary female characters always have to prove their worth more than secondary male characters. Why? Sexism is an issue, yes, but the audience holding women to (an unreasonable) double standard compared to the male characters just because they assume all the writers are sexist is the problem too. When you compare Uhura to the other secondary characters she's much more developed than them, so any issue about the lack of character development seems to be more generic for all the characters who are not Kirk or Spock, than something
exclusive to the female character just because she's a girl.
Besides, Kirk and Spock (and the male characters in general, including Nero!) are more defined by their relationships than Uhura is by her relationship with Spock.
I think, honestly, you know more about Uhura through her relationship with Spock in the last movies, than you ever did about tos Uhura in 3 seasons and all the tos movies. These people are more than officers and for once they are showing that with her too and she has a personal life and, basically, she is part of the narrative that, before, was an exclusive to Kirk, Spock and McCoy only.
also, define 'strong' because someone who is in a relationship with a vulcan (lol), faces a group of klingons alone just to try to give a change to her crew mates well knowing these guys would torture her and kill her, beams down to stun
Khan just to save the man she loves AND her friend and captain whose life relied on her chance to stop Spock before he killed the man whose blood could have saved him -- seems to be a very strong character to me.
Want to go back when she did the fandance and used a dictionary to speak klingon?
And from the vibes I get from Pegg, I wonder if Uhura's role will also be severely scaled back to make it all about the boys. He's too biased about the guys and him admitting he doesn't know how to write 'for women' gives me 'guilty conscience' vibes as if he already knows people won't like the way the female characters are written in his movie.
I guess I have to wait and see.
I suspect he will be trying hard to address his weakness in this respect. At least I hope he writes her better then Orci and Kurtzman. I wasn't keen on her character in either of the first two. Particularly ITD - it felt like she was being written primarily as Spock's girlfriend rather than the strong independent woman that I feel Uhura should be.
I'm starting to utterly despise the whole
'strong independent woman' thing that people bring up every time a female character who is not the protagonist has a relationship.
and IDK if some people are even aware of that but this argument had always been used with women of color to deny them, basically, some lovin' in a world where mainstream interracial/poc couples still make some people uncomfortable.
(it's used for queer women too for similar reasons)
Truthfully, Uhura was a 'strong independent woman who doesn't need no man' in tos because of racism (and sexism) not because the writers were being feminist.
Having her in a relationship with Spock in the reboot is, essentially, a sign that, perhaps, in our time we can handle Uhura being portrayed in a mutual loving relationship with one of the leads without anyone having a nervous breakdown because she wasn't, well, forced to kiss him by some crazy mofo messing up with both of them (cue the Kirk/Uhura 'groundbreaking' kiss). In other words, her being a love interest is progressive. Hello 2009-2015, bye bye 1960.
Tl dr: that's intersectionality man. When judging a female character that is part of an underrepresented minority (woc, queer women, transgender women etc etc) it cannot be ignored that what you might consider as a 'cliché' for a cis white female character could be the opposite thing for other characters (
this essay about Uhura explains this issue and the different perspective very well)