Decker does not try to "bone" the Probe. He's just trying to reach the part of Ilia which is in it. Why do people always have to take that to be sex? The film, admittedly, does a poor job of selling the idea that Decker becomes intrigued by V'ger (Collins even addressed this in the interviews which appear in Return to Tomorrow), but it's not about space-schtupping.
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