Chakotay: "Thank you all for coming. I'm srue you all know why we're here: UPN hasn't cancelled us yet."
Voyager Caption Contest 123: No, Just No
- Thread starter Captain Kathryn
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Chakotay: "Thank you all for coming. I'm srue you all know why we're here: UPN hasn't cancelled us yet."
Chakotay: What? I am just keeping her seat warm until she gets out of the bathroom. I mean with all the coffee she drinks I am shocked her seat doesn't double a toilet.
Neelix: Mr. Vulcan, uh, I'm not sure what we are looking at.
Paris: Is it the Frank or the beans?
Chakotay: You be Dr. Quinn and I'll be Sully.
Kathryn thinking: Oh no, with only the two of us here he is going to know that was me!
Chakotay: Kathryn!
Kathryn: Yes Chakotay?
Chakotay: Would you like a kite to go with that wind?
After years of searching, the doctor finally tracks down Neelix and B'Ellana's love child.
Kathryn: No, I wouldn't like a kite, Chuckles. But you need a mint, since what you're smelling is just your breath backing up.
Kathryn thinking: Oh no, with only the two of us here he is going to know that was me!
Chakotay: Kathryn!
Kathryn: Yes Chakotay?
Chakotay: Would you like a kite to go with that wind?
Kathryn: No, I wouldn't like a kite, Chuckles. But you need a mint, since what you're smelling is just your breath backing up.
Kathryn thinking: Oh no, with only the two of us here he is going to know that was me!
Chakotay: Kathryn!
Kathryn: Yes Chakotay?
Chakotay: Would you like a kite to go with that wind?
"That was the monkey you fool."
Then why do you avoid me?"
" I didn't want to mention it, my foot unconsciously grazed your thigh."
"Oh good, that was you and not the monkey.
Kathryn: No, I wouldn't like a kite, Chuckles. But you need a mint, since what you're smelling is just your breath backing up.
Kathryn thinking: Oh no, with only the two of us here he is going to know that was me!
Chakotay: Kathryn!
Kathryn: Yes Chakotay?
Chakotay: Would you like a kite to go with that wind?
"That was the monkey you fool."
Then why do you avoid me?"
" I didn't want to mention it, my foot unconsciously grazed your thigh."
"Oh good, that was you and not the monkey.
So that's why you said you wanted me to spank your monkey!!!
Chaks: That was a brilliant idea, Torres - telling the Captain, Seven and the Doctor that the A plot was in the last star system. So, now what do we do?
TP: I've got a great metaphor for a carburator?
Toro: Flashback to getting short-sheeted at summer camp?
Tuvie: I've got something with a pansy-petunia hybrid.
Harr: You could...promote me to Lieutenant?
Kex: Yeast infection?
Neels: Talaxian barefoot disco!
Chaks: We are so screwed.
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Since the topic is No, just No this came to me:
Beltran TPTB had an inspiration off a low budget program referred as a Reality Show where the cast send each other to the chopping block while the brass snicker behind that two way space screen behind me. Kate won the arm wrestle by a boot hooked to the table (cheater) so I was elected to announce the red shit to be eliminated.
Everyone silently Garrett
Wang silently: I suffer good. I am an asset.
Beltran: Garrett-
Beltran: You are often late But more so they thought they were running out of ideas since you refuse to have a bromance with Paris.
Garrett: Uh actually
Beltran: you recently were named a beautiful person on a pop culture magazine so the producers want to exploit you. you are safe. That means the red shirt goes to...
Everyone: "UPN that's messed up."
"Kathryn, now that we're all alone with an entire planet to ourselves, at last my true identity can be revealed ..."
"Who is it, this time? ... BackMan?"
"Did you just say 'BackMan'? There's no 'BackMan.' You mean BATman."
"OK"
"And no, I'm not Batman, so guess again! I only wore those other outfits to prepare you for the truth ... and to see if you could handle it. I'm taking a desperate gamble, here, that maybe you can, so I'll give you a hint, at first - for reals, this time, though: you know me by the big 'S' on my chest ..."
"You mean 'S' as in 'Simpleton' with your 'Stupid Shit'? 'S' as in ..."
"Are you saying 'S' or 'F' this time? Because it sounds like 'F' to me. 'F' as in 'Fun' - as in you are NONE!!!"
Would Mail-Borgder bride not work better!
Chakotay: Commander tuvok when does my Mail Order Borg-Bride get here?
Be'lanna shakes her head.
Chakotay: "I disagree, Mr. Paris. I think the conference table looks like an Orion penis with a 'Mars Attacks!' upward neck collar."
Chakotay Do I look like a knob to you people?
Paris clears throat: Scorey does and so do I.
Chakotay That was a rhetorical question. The Captain and I are in conflict a lot lately but thanks for telling me how you really feel.
Kim in his defence sir, from where neelix is sitting the table looks phallic and need I remind you you're sitting at the head of the table.
Chakotayum, thanks Kim.
Paris clears throat: Scorey does and so do I.
Chakotay That was a rhetorical question. The Captain and I are in conflict a lot lately but thanks for telling me how you really feel.
Kim in his defence sir, from where neelix is sitting the table looks phallic and need I remind you you're sitting at the head of the table.
Chakotayum, thanks Kim.
Chakotay: Meeting adjourned. Now let's get this table back to the miniature golf bay.
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