Worst lines of dialogue in Trek?

Discussion in 'General Trek Discussion' started by BlueStuff, Jun 3, 2020.

  1. Tim Thomason

    Tim Thomason Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    The Great Bird of the Galaxy demands the blood of the ignorant!
     
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  2. oldtrekkie

    oldtrekkie Captain Red Shirt

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    T'Pol: You lost the Klingon.

    Archer: I didn't lose the Klingon. He was taken.

    :guffaw:

    What did he think she meant? That he misplaced him.:D
     
  3. Ryan Thomas Riddle

    Ryan Thomas Riddle Writer and occasional starship commander Premium Member

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    I despise this Spock line from “The Conscience of the King”:

    “Even in this corner of the galaxy, two plus two still equals four.”

    Umm… no shit. In what circumstances will it equal anything else?! It’s a dumb line. Especially dumb coming outta Spock’s mouth.
     
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  4. CorporalCaptain

    CorporalCaptain Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    It's a clumsy line. There are quite a few clumsy lines in that scene. Another is "[—i]s my personal business when it might interfere with the smooth operation of this ship." Personal business? No, professional business. Smooth operation? Ugh, how about when the crew is threatened? And then, in reply, Kirk continues to question that the smooth operation of the ship has been interfered with, when there's clearly an assassin aboard? Double ugh.

    With respect to the two plus two line, I think the idea is that Spock's rhetorically saying that Jim is being illogical about nothing have been proven. He's not saying that two plus two could equal anything else. He's telling Jim that it's a virtual certainty that someone's going to try to kill him, to Spock it's as certain as 2+2=4, and, in the context of the point he's made with the other line about "personal business," it's correct from him to be getting himself involved; heck, he's making the point that Jim should have involved him from the get-go.

    A good line in that scene: "Can we predict the same for you, Captain?" [http://www.chakoteya.net/StarTrek/13.htm]
     
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  5. perceval

    perceval Cadet Newbie

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    "Brain, brain, what is brain?"
     
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  6. Gul Sengosts

    Gul Sengosts Lieutenant Commander Red Shirt

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    TNG: The Outrageous Okona

    Okona: Now, that's sex appeal.
    Data: Sexual attraction in this context is not a part of my programming. I am an android.
    Okona: Well then, have you seen any good looking computers lately?
    (awkward silence)
    Okona: That's a joke. It's funny.
    Data: Oh. Of course it is. Ahahahahaha. [literally my response]

    Same episode:

    Guinan: You're a droid and I'm a 'noid.
    Data: Humanoid.
    Guinan: Yes.
    Data: You told a joke?
    Guinan: Yes!
    Data: I am not laughing.
    Guinan: Yes!
    Data: Perhaps the joke was not funny.
    Guinan: No, the joke was funny. It's you, Data.
    Data: Are you sure?
    Guinan: Yes.

    This has to be the worst advice Guinan has given in her hundreds of years.

    Later, Data: A guy walks into the doctor's office. The doctor tells him, "you need an operation". The guy says, "I want a second opinion". The doctor says, "Okay, you're ugly, too". Ba-doom-boom.
    (silence)
    ...was I funny?
    Guinan: No.

    Seriously... that was ten times as funny as the "jokes" Okona and Guinan told him, awkwardly adding that "it's funny".
     
    Last edited: Sep 29, 2021
  7. at Quark's

    at Quark's Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Not actually one of the very worst lines, but still a significant overestimation of own capabilities: Troi in Where no one has gone before:

    "With most life forms I can usually feel something. I may not be able to understand or interpret it, but I feel something, if only a presence. "

    I think that should have read:

    "With most life forms I can usually feel something. I'll typically not be able to understand or interpret it, but I feel something, if only a presence. "
     
  8. Oddish

    Oddish Rear Admiral Commodore

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    True enough. However, if Troi could sense more than something vague, like "he's hiding something", she'd be like a "WIN" button.
     
  9. at Quark's

    at Quark's Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Yeah, I've commented on this BBS multiple times about that. ... she's a halfblood Betazoid, making her only an empath rather than a full telepath as the rest of the Betazoids are. Her other qualifications must be truly exceptional for Picard to pick her over a full telepath. I mean, he could essentially choose between:

    'Captain, I sense he's up to something but I don't know what. Please be careful!',

    and

    'Captain, he's thinking about contacting the Romulans the second you close communications, and arranging to meet with them on the third moon of Xanados VI, surface coordinates 71.234 by 65.715 , in exactly 72 hours, to finalize the deal of the unobtainium he stole, the compound they need to finish their superweapon. Please be careful!"
     
    Last edited: Sep 29, 2021
  10. Orphalesion

    Orphalesion Commodore Commodore

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    Again, not really. I know I do that everytime this comes up, but there are media that have full telepaths as characters that don't turn them into walking lie detectors/"win" buttons.
    It's all about how you portray telepathy. And with Troi they went the worst possible way: she passively picks up emotions without any effort from her at all (she's like an empathic filter feeder) AND she often states the obvious or is conveniently incapable of passively picking up the emotions of the weird glowy space thing of the week. They made her powers the same time too powerful and useless.
     
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  11. krsplat

    krsplat Lieutenant Red Shirt

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    "To boldly go where no man has gone before,"​
    could have been replaced with:​
    [COLOR=rgb(20, 20, 20)]"Out through the castle walls, and into the forest shire,[/COLOR]
    [COLOR=rgb(20, 20, 20)]Over the hills we go, to start theeeeee show"[/COLOR]
    To the tune and melody of All Things Considered on NPR.
    Actually nevermind. similar theme, different mood. wrong element and ambience.​
     
  12. DonIago

    DonIago Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Beyond not knowing how many full telepaths serve in Starfleet (Vulcan telepathy doesn't seem as though it would be more effective than Troi's empathy given the role in question), we have no idea whether Picard even had the option of picking a full telepath. It may have been the choice between an empath and people without any psi abilities.

    Unless I've forgotten a point in the series where Picard said he had the option of having a counselor who was a full telepath?
     
  13. at Quark's

    at Quark's Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Agreed,. but then she's not the only telepathic Betazoid on the show. Take her own mother, for example, she looks like she could be that 'walking lie detector/ win button' very much if only she wanted to use her gifts that way (for example look at the way she rattles Picard's cage for his naughty thoughts, for example. ) So they could have avoided that trap by carefully portraying the full telepaths as still not being able -or willing- to do that, for some reason. They could for example have made some moral code of conduct for Betazoids restricting their use of telepathy to such ends. But AFAIK, they did nothing of the sort.


    Given that Betazoid is a Federation planet, and we see multiple Betazoids in Federation service (from the top of my head I'm mentioning Deanna, her mother as a diplomat, Lon Suder, the Betazoid counselor on the other ship in Night Terrors), and there are more, and the fact that we never hear a remark of 'one of the few Betazoids that ever joined Starfleet!' I'm tempted to conclude that they aren't exactly rare. And given that there are also other fully telepathic species it would be hard for me to believe that Picard couldn't have chosen a full telepath, had he really insisted on one. We're talking about the flagship, after all - it would get priority in getting the 'best' candidates.
     
  14. Orphalesion

    Orphalesion Commodore Commodore

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    Personally I would have made it so that reading somebody's mind 1) takes considerable concentration and active effort, and 2) is very difficult to do without the person who's mind they are reading noticing.
    So in that version, Troi reading somebody's mind would have been comparable in effort and skill as breaking into a well guarded house.
     
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  15. Oddish

    Oddish Rear Admiral Commodore

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    I think that if Betazoid mind reading was that powerful, every ship would have to have one. And a Ferengi negotiator, to counter other ship's Betazoids.
     
  16. Bork359

    Bork359 Lieutenant Newbie

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    anything out of Troi's mouth
     
  17. Oddish

    Oddish Rear Admiral Commodore

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    I liked it when she said "Muzzle it!" to the goddess of empathy.
     
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  18. Annorax849

    Annorax849 Commander Red Shirt

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    "To fear death is not logical"

    Yeah it set up McCoy's response, but it was still a dumb line, especially for Spock, imo
     
  19. XCV330

    XCV330 Premium Member

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    Spock was completely correct. Fearing death isn't logical. Death is a given. Fearing it is like fearing gravity, breathing or the color green. You will almost certainly encounter all of them. Fearing it is an emotional response, not a logical one. To be wary of things that can cause death is a different matter.
     
  20. at Quark's

    at Quark's Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Voyager, Renaissance Man

    I'd say the opposite is true. Suppose they lose Janeway. A sad loss, but Chakotay or Tuvok takes her place as captain (they should be prepared for that eventuality anyway) and Voyager will go on fine. Lose the warp core, especially in deep space, and it means they're stranded, at least as long as they can't obtain or manufacture a new warp core, which isn't going to be easy.
     
    Last edited: Oct 11, 2021